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Needed: Honest Drummer.  Age unimportant.  Reply to Ad 09487-C.
Having trouble recording just the right answering machine messages?   Try our pre-recorded messages that are guaranteed to delight your friends and family alike.  And, who knows, they might even keep your marriage together! Ad 09488-D Sappho Slugger Summer Schedule

July 1 [Home] Rileys' Cowgirls
July 6 [Away] SuperCharged Gal Pals
July 9 [Home] TBA
July 14 [Home] White Sox
July 20 [Home] Damsels in Distress
July 23 [Away] Dame Consort
July 27 [Home] TBA

 

Has the head of your axe flown off?  Do you find yourself chopping with too much zest?  Scaring the neighbors?  With our "Happy Hatchet" you will find that folks regard you with a much better attitude.  Stop scaring off potential victims.  Get the "Happy Hatchet" today for only six easy installments of $19.95.  Ad 09489-A

Rooster Boy

See him shake his stuff tonight at the
KABOOM ROOM!

 

Special at the 7-11 This Week Only!

Get a free Happiness Pie with each fill up of Premium Gasoline.

555-Jerk

Call today and find out what it's all about!

 

Are you a businessman?  Are you bored in your current position?   Do you lack the get up and go that you need to get and stay ahead? 

Join us for one of the following:
Warrior Within Weekends!
$4,500/each

July 4-5 Toronto
July 10-11 Montreal
July 18-19 Quebec
July 25-26 Winnipeg

Coming to Calgary and Vancouver in August.  Dates TBA.

Sick of going to that same old 9-5 everyday?

Come to work for us today and earn the highest pay and best benefits!

Temps R Us

We've placed thousands and we can place you!

"It seems sometimes that all my life has been one big temp."
    -Satisfied Temp, Tanya

 

Father's Day Special!

Does your daddy drink?  Why not get him a present he can use and enjoy instead of those foolish socks your mom said for you to get?

Come by Lame Liquors today and get your daddy a gift certificate.  We have them in $10, $20 and $50.

You've read Green Eggs & Ham and Horton Hears a Who...Now you can enjoy another Dr. Seuss books that's destine to be a classic:

The Dr. Seuss Bible

If he's the only author who speaks to your soul and you need salvation, pick up a copy at any store today for $24.95!

You'll thank God you did...