God is dead and no one cares
If there is a hell, I will see you there

Heresy - Nine Inch Nails

DAY ONE

Julian Subatoi Bashir's thoughts, day 1

They gave us PADDs. I still can't get over that. Why? They dragged us through god alone knows how many levels of dark and filthy corridors until my head spun, they locked us up inside a room that I think shares the dimensions of my bathroom, and yet they found it in their hearts to give us PADDs to allow us to record this lovely experience.

Bastards. I still don't know what we did wrong. One minute we were collecting sample readings, the other we were captured, prosecuted and jailed. And I haven't heard one charge brought against us either. But then that's how Cardassians do things, I suppose.

Garak is here. I don't know why, but it makes me feel a little safer being with him, even though I know he should be the last person in here with us. Some Starfleet officer I am. Still, I'm wise to think he has experience in this. I think he was also the only one to really struggle to the last. I tried to heal that wound as best I can, but the Cardassians took away my medical kit. I can't say I'm in better shape either, mind you. I mean, since when do I ever act logically? I just had to jump into the fire and hope everything would settle accordingly. I guess I might have to start thinking this is real life, and not some fairy tale where all will be well at the end. Father was right. I don't know why I'm thinking about this, but I can remember him telling me that I had to stop treating life like a game. And I have to. Lives are now in jeopardy, and if I don't start thinking straight, I might just get all of us killed.

Yeah, like a doctor could make that much of a difference. God it's sooo cold in here. How come it's become so cold in such a small amount of time? Garak is sitting by himself in a corner while Dax and Kira are moving about and inspecting our cell. I want to join them, but I feel so tired. And cold. Maybe if I ask him politely I could sit with him. Share some heat with him. I know the cold in here must be that much more unbearable to him. I just hope the Cardassians don't keep us in here, or at the very least I hope they bring us food. I'm getting scared. I've never felt so scared before. I don't know. Maybe it was the screams I heard while we were being dragged here. Maybe it was the darkness.

Maybe it was the smell of death.

End of Entry

DAY TWO

There were few things in the universe that managed to irritate Commander Jadzia Dax to the point of annoyance. How unfortunate for Major Kira that nervous pacing was one of them. Yet the Bajoran didn't seem to notice when Dax buried her face in her hands to hide the rankled look on her face. She simply kept going, shaking her head and muttering to herself. "I don't like this one bit," she breathed. "Why haven't they contacted us yet? What do they want with us?"

Dax finally sighed. "I don't know," she replied, her fingers curling into rigid claws as she added, "but will you please stop doing that? You're driving me crazy."

Kira kept going, now glaring at her friend. "Sorry, but I don't like being imprisoned in small cells, starving to death."

"Well pacing around won't solve anything," protested the Trill, her shapely eyebrows drawn inward. "You're just expending energy for nothing!"

Kira turned her focus on the floor, still walking. "It keeps me busy."

"Well find something else to keep you busy!"

So it begins, Julian thought from his corner, shivering inside Garak's arms. The Cardassian was pressed against the stone wall, dozing off at moments, breathing hoarsely when awake. In his arms Julian was curled up, using the tailor's warmth to keep him alive. A dark, slowly healing wound had stained his uniform at his shoulder, and he had started to lose feeling in his arm a few hours ago. Garak had also suffered under the hands of the Cardassians, his chest a host to a wound that was not looking very well. Kira and Dax had equally fallen prey to the guards' brutal manners, though both had twisted aside at the right moment and taken only the lightest end of their punishment.

Julian shifted, then moaned at the pain the act engendered. "Will you two stop bickering?" he snapped angrily. "This is no time to get ourselves angry at each other.

Against the wall Garak rumbled acquiescently, his eyes still closed. "The Doctor is right. We will not be brought food until tomorrow." An old tactic which I'm far too familiar with, he thought. "Why don't we all sit down and meditate?" He wasn't even trying to sound enthusiastic. Their situation had eroded well beyond the point of cheerful words of motivation.

Kira snorted, her face grim as she redirected her anger at the tailor. "Meditate," she spat the word like an insult. "Since when do Cardassians meditate? That's a spiritual thing to do."

The clear blue eyes opened, serenely, and fixed the Major with a ruthless stare. "I won't even bother answering that particular remark Major. But if you must know, meditating is an effective way of keeping your bodily functions at a minimum." He closed his eyes and shifted his back against the wall, trying to get comfortable as he added in a low mutter, "You might want to consider it if you wish to survive under our present conditions. And on the same token, you might also try to uncover the way out of here."

Dax spun her head at him. "Why don't you? You're the expert."

He sighed exasperatly, entwining his arms more tightly around his shivering charge. "That's precisely what I was doing before your irritating dialogue disturbed my thoughts. And keep in mind Commander; I've never been in the prisoner's role before. As a simple files clerk, the thought never crossed my mind to waste my time verifying the possible escape roots the Order's cells could potentially offer. Those were the soldiers' chores."

Julian bucked in his arms and Garak released him with a startled look. "All right, enough!" the young doctor cried, glaring at them all, not even bothering to comment wryly on Garak's profession of the month. "Everyone, just shut the hell up! We've been here 16 hours and not one of us has been able to catch one hour of sleep. So I suggest you all find a corner, get as comfortable as you can get and try to rest!" He muttered under his breath and snaked back into Garak's arms, his hands naturally circling the thick, powerful waist, seeking warmth.

"He's right," Dax replied to the outburst softly. She turned to Kira and pursed her lips. "I'm sorry, I'm just not really thinking clearly. And the implant they gave us is making me nervous."

Kira nodded her ascent, touching the skin just under her ear. "I know." She looked at the doctor and asked, "What do you suppose it's for?"

He shrugged weakly. "Without a tricorder I couldn't tell you. So far I haven't seen any blatant changes in any of us."

Garak let out a humourless chuckle. "I don't need a tricorder to tell you what they gave us Doctor. They used telepathic links. Whatever their intentions are, they intend on making us travel a long way with minimal supervision. That or they want to insure that we do not escape them so easily."

Kira crumpled her nose. "Telepathic links? I never heard of those particular implants."

Garak continued smoothly, his eyes closed as he tried to slow his breathing at the same time. His speech became slurred and somewhat languid as a result. "It creates a mental link between two people," he said slowly. "Whatever happens, one or the other can't escape without feeling violent stirrings in his body. Usually this is done between a prisoner and a guard with an implant that works uni-directional, so I can't possibly divine why they've linked us together."

Julian raised an eyebrow. "So who's linked with who?"

Garak shrugged lightly. "The only way we'll know that is in time."

"What happens?" From Dax, who now sat opposite Kira in her corner.

The tailor's voice turned a notch impatient. "You'll know when it does."

This time, Kira chimed in with annoyance. "Garak, I don't like surprises."

Finally he hissed and opened his eyes to glare. "Look, I'm trying to conserve as much energy as I can right now if ever we're to force our way out of this, so I suggest you leave me be. It won't be an unpleasant surprise, I assure you. Of course it won't be pleasant either. You'll just ... get used to it."

Both Kira and Dax grudgingly accepted defeat and settled as comfortably as they could, sighing and grunting unpleasantly. Against his chest, Julian whispered, "How do you know about all this?"

"I read a lot of books," the Cardassian answered stiffly. His hand curled over Bashir's head and pushed it against him with almost violent force. "Now sleep Doctor. You need to recuperate as well."

Nodding, finding Garak's embrace oddly comforting, Julian dozed into what he hoped was a rallying sleep.

Elim Garak's thoughts, day 2

If I could somehow make this incessant cold go away, perhaps I could think more clearly. Gul, why did I have to insist on accompanying the good doctor on this trip? Those bolts of fabric on Ruhah IV would have still been there had I chosen to take a public transport tomorrow or the day after. But of course, I had to borrow the doctor's good intentions and accompany his away team to Cardassia, knowing they would kindly wait for me at Ruhah IV upon our return. That's because I'm an old fool. I went against the provisions of my exile and followed him into this foolish excursion which he assured me was all perfectly legal.

Yet why would I detest myself for wanting such a thing? I've spent Gul knows how many hours rankling over this very subject. My ... attraction to him. My desire. My inability to stay away from him for too long. Gul, if only he knew how much I desired him, there, in my arms, shivering and placing all of his trust into me as such his soul allows him.

But I have tamed these desires, along with that glimmer of hope that perhaps he feels the same way. And besides, the time is not right. We must first uncover the way to escape, not whether or not the good doctor will accept my advances. I keep wondering, idly, to whom our captors have linked me. Some part of me wars with the rest of me; I keep hoping I will be linked with Dr. Bashir, so that he may sense what I feel, instead of me detailing it to him with small, frightened words. Then again, the coward in me wishes the opposite. After all, why would I not contend with the way our relationship is right now? It is no use in wishing for something that will never be after all.

You should know tailor. You've learnt it by Dukat's hand.

End of Entry

DAY THREE

Julian dozed lightly against the thin, flimsy mattress they had brought in, trying to beckon sleep. Somewhere in the cell he heard the faint snores of someone already entrenched in deep sleep, and he suddenly longed for it. He turned onto his back, feeling nauseous at the foul reek emanating from his mattress. He curled his arm over his forehead and contemplated the ceiling thoughtfully, disturbed that he could not distinguish it from where he lay. He was about to sit up and narrow his eyes to sharpen his view when Dax's light voice broke his thoughts. He turned to where he knew she had placed her makeshift bed and frowned at the darkness, hearing her words as though through a dream. And just when he thought he was himself dreaming, he suddenly recognized the words to be Trill.

He climbed to his feet silently and padded to her cot, making as little noise as possible for the other two sleepers. He knelt beside her and whispered, "Dax?"

The figure on the bed moved, then a slurred voice drifted to his ears. "Mmh ... mmh what is it Julian, I'm sleeping ..."

Julian frowned. "Sleeping? Are you sure? I heard you talking."

"No ... no I wasn't talking," she replied.

Julian sighed and sat back on his heels. "Well I didn't dream it ... I heard you mention zenas? Or something close to that."

There was a sudden frown clouding the Trill's words. "Zehanas. How do you know about her?"

Julian kept his voice down, but injected a measure of desperation in his tone. "I don't! I just told you; I heard you talking."

"I ... was thinking about her Julian. I was dreaming of home and my sister Zehanas. There's no way you could have known about what I was thinking."

Julian nodded thoughtfully. "Yes there is. We must be telepathically linked."

The form on the bed moved again, as though twisting aside. Dax' face appeared next to him, but Julian was still looking away. "You mean to tell me we can even read thoughts?" she asked. "When Garak said telepathic, I just thought it meant we were mentally linked."

Julian shook his head and finally turned toward Dax. "Apparently not. So if we're together, that means Kira and Garak must be linked."

Julian waited as he watched the Trill's peaceful face, and when he heard her voice again, he nearly screeched in terror. "Hm. I can't say Kira will be enormously pleased about that," she thought. As Julian stared, the Trill's lips never moved, and her eyes were tightly shut.

Julian peddled back, his eyes wide with a mixture of fear and wonder.

In the other corner of the cell, sharing during their turn the only other mattress available, Garak and Kira slept soundly. The tailor even snored softly as he turned on his side and draped his arm over Kira's waist unknowingly.

Jadzia Dax's thoughts, day 3

I scared him. I didn't mean to, I wasn't even realizing that I was speaking to him through my mind. Waking up to that look of sheer terror is not a pretty sight. But he's calm now and came to accept the surprise Garak had warned us all about. And as I told him, I knew Kira would not be pleased at sharing her thoughts with Garak, but then can you really blame her?

I saw them this morning, their face peaceful with sleep, unaware of each other even as they had edged closer to the other for warmth and comfort. I think Garak was wise to wake up first and detach himself from her before she herself became aware of their position.

Still. The sight of them together was endearing. I keep thinking about Julian in those instant. Would he and I look so natural as well?

End of entry

Kira had begun to pace again. Her face was clouded over with a grim mask, her fists curled and her jaw set. She was not pleased.

From the other side of the cell, Garak spread his hands helplessly. "Look, I can't help what I subconsciously think, so don't start screaming at me just because you find my thoughts undesirable!"

Kira paused, directing her murderous gaze at the tailor. "Undesirable?" she echoed petulantly. "Garak, they're just plain disturbing! Prophets," she muttered, resuming her mindless pacing. "Is that their idea of torture? To link me with a bloodthirsty Cardie for the rest of my life? I don't--" She broke off and fixed Garak with a wide-eyed, bewildered stare.

Garak nodded. "Good. You read that thought. Now this is no time to get hysterical. You were in the Resistance, you must know a few useful tricks. I mean you did--"

He interrupted himself by the series of image that scrolled by in his mind in a flash. Kira, laying down with a Cardassian, cooing sweet, meaningless words in his ear, enticing the guard and his companion to bed by herself while her compatriots snuck by to access sensitive information. When the fleeting memory was gone, he let his mouth work without a sound before he shook his head. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to call up any memories."

"Forget it," she snapped. "And for you information, I am trying to figure out what we're going to do, don't you get your ass all in a bunch."

Garak opened his mouth to protest but Julian pushed him aside. "Look, you're not helping," he hissed.

"I'm not helping?" he echoed petulantly. "Can you reign your thoughts doctor? No more than I can. I won't stand here and be persecuted for that." He glared beyond Julian's shoulder at Kira, who had no qualm about glaring back.

"Look, we're all under a little stress--"

"A little? Julian, we haven't eaten since yesterday, we've barely been able to catch enough sleep with those endless screams echoing down the corridor, and we've successfully managed to get under each other's skin. Personally, I wouldn't mind a hot bath right about now." He inhaled deeply, glaring at Bashir as he took control over his anger. Getting incensed at his friend was a waste of time, not to mention a counter-productive activity. "I'm sorry," he said simply, letting himself sit down over the thin mattress.

Annoyed, Julian didn't even pause at the sound of his first name on the tailor's lips. Instead, he let himself fall beside Garak, sighing loudly as he eyed Kira and Dax, bickering over the last incident. "I am sick of this," Garak muttered. "Even I had better sense than to leave my prisoners to rot inside a cell," he said under his breath, ignoring the sudden sharp glance from his companion.

"Garak, you we--" He pressed his lips together as he heard the lock on their door snap dryly. They both climbed to their feet while Kira and Dax stepped back from the door. When it swung open, two guards rushed through, aiming their disrupter at both groups. Between them, the path was cleared for the Gul who now entered the cell leisurely.

Garak almost groaned. Instead, he spat the name like an insult, "Gul Madred."

The Cardassian nodded with a sharp smile, feline-like, and said, "Why yes Garak. And you ... I'm afraid it's still plain and simple Garak, is it not?" He chuckled and moved about the cell, inspecting his prisoners. He paused in front of Kira and cupped her chin with his fingers, regarding her appraisingly. She snarled and tossed her head free from his cold grasp. His smooth voice rumbled in a quiet laugh. "Excellent. I was hoping there was a Bajoran among your group." He gave her a lopsided smile and turned, sweeping his gaze down Dax's physique, then lingering his gaze on Dr. Bashir. "Oh Garak," he breathed. "You've certainly made beautiful friends. It will be a pleasure to interrogate them all. And you." He fixed the tailor with a cold stare as he waved a hand in the air.

Before Garak could struggle, the guards had his arms pinned behind his back and dug their disrupter in his back. He flinched, and Kira gasped slightly at the hint of fear she received from the tailor. But fear ... not for himself ... she stared at him incredulously. He was afraid for her! Why?

"You can't do this," he growled.

Madred chuckled. "Oh but why not? You've failed the terms of your exile my dear colleague. We gave you a chance, and you all but laughed in our face for offering it to you. Believe me, it will not be a mistake we will make again." He smiled and approached Kira, circling her and pausing behind her while she froze in anger. "Do you appreciate what we did my friend?" he asked Garak. "I suspected it would be a revolting prospect to be linked with a Bajoran. After all, you were among few to take on their torture with such fierce and delighted determination. Well I've given you some dignity tailor." He leaned forward and reached around her to trace two fingers across her cheek, sweeping his ruthless gaze over her earring. "A Bajoran will suffer by your hand again Garak," he whispered, then all too quickly he stalked to the door and motioned the guards to follow him.

As Garak was dragged to the door; as he struggled and winced at the strong hold, as Julian cried out in anger and clawed at one guard to release his friend and as Dax physically pulled Julian away, Kira remained still, shock permeating her features. All she thought about was the endless stream of apologies flooding her mind by the Cardassian now gone beyond the closing metallic door.

Not ten minutes scrolled by before she let out a shattering scream.

Julian was trying to calm Kira up, but it was no use. The Bajoran was lost. She kept screaming, her hands tearing through her hair, her collar, gasping and moaning, writhing against the wall. Tears leaked from her eyes without pause, and on and on she kept bawling, "Make it stop! Oh Prophets help me, they're killing him!!!"

"Nerys!" Dax sent gently, trying to approach her. She winced when Kira dropped to the floor, twisting.

"Please ... please make them stop, he's dying ... he's suffering ... I can't ... STOP IT!!!"

For an hour she continued like this. Crying hysterically and dozing off at moments in utter exhaustion. In those moments she spoke Kardasi; songs, children's nursery rhymes that made no sense to either Julian or Dax. When she was awake she tore at the walls, banging her fists until they turned bloody, ripping her collar as though she was suffocating, and all the while screaming and crying.

She slipped into a peaceful state mere minutes before the door opened again, and Garak was flung inside, bloody and gasping for breath. Both Julian and Dax rushed to him but the Doctor was taken away by the same guards, no doubt to the same fate as the tailor's.

Sniffling, wiping at her tears Kira crawled to Garak's position and turned him over to his back, letting out an appalled sob when she saw the criss crossing gouges on his skin, the burnt marks, the welts, the terrible canvas of agony on the Cardassian's naked body. She swallowed a choke and cupped the tailor's face, trying to still her own nerves. The impression of the Cardassian's thoughts were almost gone, too faint. So very close to death.

"Garak ... Garak, look at me, it's Nerys. It's over! You survived, it's over ..." She pressed her lips to his, the cold flesh causing a shiver to run down her spine. He stopped swallowing down air for a moment, enough to focus on her. When he did, his eyes glazed over, and he swallowed hard. She nodded with another sob, feeling the utter sorrow and remorse in his mind and carefully wound her arms around him. "I know ... I know, it's over ... Sshhh ..."

And how ironic, she would later muse, that she, a Bajoran, was rocking a Cardassian in her arms to appease his qualms, cooing soft words in his ear.

She didn't notice Dax crawling to a corner, shivering in her own private agony.

When Kira thought Garak had dozed to sleep, she went to leave his side to attend to Dax when she felt his hands, trembling, moving with sudden restlessness over her, slipping inside her prisoner's uniform, caressing skin, whispering incoherent words of apology and pleas of forgiveness. For a moment she thought she heard Julian amidst the erratic thoughts in his head, but she pushed the revelation aside and opened herself to the fleeting pleasure, the makeshift medication to mend both their broken souls. She stretched back against the cold floor, quickly unfastening the clothing covering her thighs, urging him, whispering and breathing raucously. He buried his face in the crook of her neck as he entered her, and both moaned in delight, the pain moved aside for that brief instant where instinctive pleasure took over. She never paused to wonder why she was letting herself be consumed by passion with a Cardassian; all she wanted was pleasure to erase the terrible agony she'd felt mere moments ago. She had no doubts about the tailor's motivations being the same.

Garak increased the pace and slid effortlessly in and out of her wet depths, caressing her, embracing her, touching her with a tenderness she would have never expected from a Cardassian. She closed her eyes and inhaled deeply, feeling the weight of him on her, feeling him push time and time again with a rocking as inevitable as nightfall, as soothing as waves crashing over the beach of her childhood fantasies ... just as dreamy.

She sighed her pleasure, now feeling his hands on her breasts, stroking gently, sucking with his lips, moaning as his own release crept up to him. She arched her back, arcing her body toward him as brilliant light exploded behind her closed eyelids. Yet she was silent, sighing, moaning, feeling the hot stream of the tailor's essence rush inside of her. Garak had also been silent, and it was only when he lay on her, breathing heavily did Nerys immediately knew the Cardassian to be asleep. She took one last deep breath, told herself she couldn't care less who found them this way and drifted off to sleep as well, the Cardassian draped over her an oddly protective blanket.

In the corner, Dax slept with tears in her eyes, biting down on a knuckle until a stream of blood traced down her forearm.

Kira Nerys's thoughts, day 6

Prophets ... someone would have told me I'd be making love to Garak a week ago and I would have laughed hysterically. But I don't care anymore. I can't ... I can't bear it anymore. The torture has been going on steadily for days now, and we can't stop it. They come in and chooses two each day. I suppose that's why they gave us the implants. Reduces time. Increases efficiency. Torture two while only having to deal with one. The first day was terrible ... they hadn't fitted us with a neural wire yet so they used whips and horrendous things on us. Things I didn't even know existed during the Occupation. That chair ... I think I scream every time I see it. They whipped Garak and burned him. With Dax they tore her fingernails off and whipped her too. Julian ... Julian wasn't hurt like that. I think they just contented themselves on raping him over and over while beating him. But he was also feeling Dax at the same time, so I can only assume he felt both tortures. Prophets, I didn't recognize him when they dumped him into the cell. He was bleeding so much ... I was taken away before I could help him, and Garak was brought to Madred's office for a personal inquiry.

When will it end? I can't bear it anymore, we've been here ... I don't even remember how many days we've been here, and all we've been through is abuse. The questions they ask us are ridiculous! We haven't been charged with anything, and we don't even know if we're considered missing or dead back at the station. Oh Prophets ... give me strength ... or kill me. I can't go on like this.

End of entry

Garak had knocked her out. Kira wanted to protest, but it was the only way they could do this now. Whoever was with the person being telepathically tortured would knock out the other one. He had been reluctant at first, but seeing Dax crying and screaming had been enough for Garak to knock her out. He'd caught her before she hit the ground and lowered her tenderly to one of the mattress. Inwardly he cried for Julian.

"He'll be all right," Kira whispered from behind, touching the tailor's shoulder tentatively. She was still uncomfortable with the idea that they had been intimate. Kira was usually intimate only with people she felt deep affection, even love, for. She was certain she didn't love Garak. But as much as she'd hated him on DS9, he was no longer a Cardassian to her eyes. Only a tortured soul like the rest of them.

Garak stared at Dax mutely, his eyes dry, his soul aching. "He'll never be all right Major. I know what they're doing to him, and he will never recover from it." He walked away from Kira's touch and laid back onto the other flimsy mattress, turning his back to her.

In all his life, Julian had never known such humiliation. They'd lowered him onto his knees, naked, and he shivered from the cold floor. Looking up with tear-filled eyes, he'd watched as one of his tormentors freed his erection from the skin-tight black trousers and aimed it for the young man's lips. Behind him, a whip crashed over his back, and he wailed in agony. "Take it!" someone, he wasn't sure who, shouted at him. He choked back his sobs and leaned forward to engulf the ridged cock. But the insensitive guard laughed, and griped both sides of his head before impaling Julian's mouth and throat with his shaft in one brutal thrust. Gagging, Julian barely felt the second clash of the whip.

Finally he was allowed one breath before the guard began to rock his hips, and he inadvertently bit down hard as he felt his hair twisted within the passionate grip of his assailant. The guard cried out blissfully, now pistoning his hips with uncontrollable lust. Julian cried and cried, now whimpering at the rising numbers of blows on his back, and when he thought they had stopped, it was merely replaced with another form of humiliating agony. Someone lifted him by the hips and impaled him without admonition. He sombered into unconsciousness before he could finish the guard, oblivious to the flow of semen dribbling over his back as his upper body slipped to the ground. The guard roared in anger and kicked him to the side of the face.

When they threw him back into the cell, Garak was sleeping soundly. He was oblivious to Kira's hysterical crying, and Dax's roars against the departing guards. In his dreams, he was happily entwined with his true love.

DAY EIGHT

He whispered in her ear, his hands playing softly at her thighs and hips. "I won't hurt you ... I promise, I won't hurt you ..."

They'd decided to try again, this time with both their mind in lucid condition. All they wanted now was a show of affection; they needed to feel wanted. In another corner of the room, Dax was making Julian forget the atrocious day he'd spent. They'd kept him longer this time, prolonging the brief rapes into long involved games. They'd hurt him less physically, but the pain was still there. The humiliation, the anger. Oddly enough, he could still look Garak in the eye without feeling the same anger. Perhaps it was because he was his friend. Perhaps it was because Julian knew Garak was suffering the same fate.

Under him, Kira arched her throat to him, gasping a little as he let his hands trail over her inner thighs, caressing, tender. Her fingers dug into his shoulders, and she flinched for a moment, seeing herself during the Occupation, in a dingy, dark bedroom with two lustful Cardassians.

Garak paused, and simply held her. "Don't think that ... I swear, if we're to keep our sanity intact, you have to trust me ..."

Julian moaned from the other corner of the room, resting his head on the hard bunk as Jadzia caressed and fondled him, her lips tracing the arch of his neck, licking skin, nibbling and teasing while he writhed under her. Garak barely glanced at them before he closed his eyes painfully, swallowing hard.

"Prophets ... Garak ... " Kira whispered, looking up at Garak with wide, sympathetic eyes. She had despised the tailor for so long; yet how difficult it was to see him under those eyes of hatred when she saw and read all that went through his mind. How vulnerable it made him, despite the tumultuous violence that he kept so well guarded under deceiving facades, despite the terrible anger he had for everything. And now this ... the tsunami of jealousy and lust and passion and love and everything in between that had assaulted her mind from that one, single glance.

He ducked his head, as though ashamed, and shifted aside. "Indeed," he whispered, half to himself. He glanced at them again and wanted so desperately to cry, watching the young man open himself so enthusiastically to Dax ... eager for her, for a woman's touch. Never his, he was nearly sure of that. He felt a hand on his jaw turning his focus away, back to Nerys' wide dark eyes.

"You have to tell him. Love like that--" she frowned and dropped her hand. "Why do you want to protest so much? Why is it hard for you to admit love for someone?"

"Because love leads to disappointment," he replied hoarsely. "And I've had enough disappointments in my life. I don't want to ruin two lives."

"What makes you think you'll ruin his life by confessing to him?"

"There's nothing to confess," he growled, swinging his legs around to sit at the edge of the bunk. "And besides, he would never want anything to do with me. But Gul ..." he sighed, arching his head back.

"When you held him ..." Kira nodded, reading the rest of his thought. "In the cell. I have to say, you keep your desires well hidden."

"It's the only thing that keeps him protected. He will never know."

Kira opened her mouth to reply when a voice drifted from the other corner to theirs. "Hey ..." They both looked back at Dax and Julian, entangled together. "Why so much talking?"

Garak remained quiet and returned his gaze to the floor, while Kira threw on her uniform hastily as she climbed to her feet and went to their side. She pulled Dax aside and tossed her head at a corner where they sat to talk.

Julian sighed contentedly, stretched his long limbs and stood, his body gleaming with a soft film of sweat. He padded to Garak's bunk and sat down with a satiated sigh, watching Garak's back. The tailor tensed for a moment, refusing to meet the young man's gaze. From the corner, Kira raised an eyebrow before a shadow clouded her face. She'd caught his fleeting thought of taking Julian then and there, regardless of protests or screams.

Instead, Julian spoke soothingly. "So. Is it difficult? With Kira ... I mean, I don't really blame her or anything ... I just hope it's okay," he said, pressing his warm palm over Garak's shoulder. The Cardassian's muscles went rigid, and Julian frowned. He shifted into a better position and began massaging the tailor's shoulders. "My gods Garak, you do need to relax. Maybe you can ask Dax ... I mean, at this point we don't really have secrets between each other. With all the torture ... with the ... with ..." he trailed off, his hands becoming slack over Garak's shoulders. He looked at Dax, his eyes wide, his mouth gaping.

And just when both women realized that whatever Nerys was telling Dax, the Trill's reaction and thoughts would be shared with the doctor, Garak hissed menacingly. He got up abruptly, pointing his finger at Kira. "You cannot keep your mouth shut can you? I confide in you, for the first time I open myself to someone and you have to go blab it to the entire world!"

Julian was kneeling over the bed, urging Garak to calm down. The tailor shrugged him off, grabbed his trousers and hastily dressed himself. He went to his corner and sat, his back to all of them. "Just leave me alone," he growled, and put his mind to sleep.

Julian bit his lower lip, looked at Kira and Dax for help but decided this was something he had to do himself. He felt Dax's sympathy and coos of courage inside his mind, but all that was insignificant compared to the whirlwind of emotions assailing him. He had no idea what to say or what to do as he approached the Cardassian; only that he, in some way, understood the tailor completely. Why? Because he felt the same way? Or because he knew how being betrayed felt? If Kira had done something of the sort to him, he wouldn't have considered it a betrayal. Kira was only trying to help ... yet to the Cardassian, one who'd spent his life keeping secrets and never revealing them to even the closest of friends, Kira's actions would have been devastating.

He knelt beside Garak and placed a warm hand on the tailor's shoulder. When he shrugged it off, Julian sighed and sat crossed legged on the floor. "Garak," he began. "I know you're angry right now, but Kira didn't mean any harm. She only wanted to help ... listen Garak, we're four people trapped in a cell with telepathic links connecting us. We've made love to each other in front of each other, and we've suffered in front of each other. This is no longer the time for secrets Garak. If you want to keep your sanity, don't shut us out. Don't do this ..." he whispered, and tried to muster all the feeling he could get into his pleading stare.

"All right," he hissed, turning to face the Doctor with his grim eyes. The normally serene, icy depths of his stare were now dark, cobalt blue. "No more secrets. You're right, we might die here and never have the chance to right the wrongs of our lives, or take back regrets. Here's one regret Doctor that I'm sharing with you today. One regret I'm sure you'll have a pretty laugh over with Dax and Kira." He moved to get up, leaning forward in the process until his mouth was touching Julian's ear. He whispered, "I love you," and completed his movement, straightening up and walking to his bunk where he let himself fall and resigned himself to finally sleep. At least the confession was out.

Julian just stared at him mutely, eyes wide and lips parted.

The torture stopped. For one blissful day, it was as though they had been forgotten. And in that one day, they had been allowed to think clearly. Julian sat in a dim corner and sipped his broth mutely, his eyes distant. He hadn't spoken to Garak since the tailor's admission. On the other end, Garak chipped absently at the cracked concrete on the floor.

"I hate myself," Kira muttered, hugging herself as Dax looked on. "This is my fault. Now both Julian and Garak won't talk to me." She wondered just when Garak's opinion of her had started to matter.

"It has nothing to do with you," Dax breathed, drawing the Bajoran into her arms. "They're just thinking about what they'll do now." She looked steadily at Julian while Kira rested her head against her shoulder. She was thinking how passionate Julian was, how sweet making love to him had really been. He'd pursued her for so long, and she had never yielded. When he stopped, she had felt regret. She wanted so desperately to lose herself in his passion, to explore him fully and so completely, but her training had prohibited her such luxury. Only her training didn't matter between these four walls. They could be dragged to their execution tomorrow morning for all they knew, and no-one would ever know what had transpired within the confines of their cell. She cried at the thought. Forgotten. They'd become simple fond memories for friends and family, faint ones for acquaintances. She sighed and held Kira closer to her and rocked gently with her.

Garak grew tired of chipping his nail at the crack so simply swung back, hitting his back against the wall with a sigh. He looked forward, to Julian who was meekly finishing his broth. He narrowed his eyes, and his desire for the young man intensified tenfold. It was enough. Waiting for the inevitable torture was bearable. Waiting for him to speak wasn't. So he got to his feet, silently, and stalked to Julian's mattress, his hands curling into fists. He looked down, Julian looked up, then averted his eyes. He deposited the empty bowl at the side of his mattress and returned to his absent musings.

Garak growled and swooped down, pushing Julian back and pinning him to the bed. He looked back into the startled mahogany eyes and hissed, "I can't stand it. I have to have you ..." His tone became pleading, and his eyes slanted in sorrow. "Please Julian ..." He ducked his head and pressed his forehead to the doctor's chest. "I need you."

Kira had wanted to get up at Garak's violent assault, but Dax had held her back, whispering that this was something both needed to resolve. She hadn't felt any overt fear from Julian's mind, and thus would stay distant as long as he didn't begin to panic.

Julian looked up at the invisible ceiling and bit his lower lip, his fists uncurling inside Garak's cool grip. He let his eyelids drift closed and he nodded mutely. "Yes ..." he murmured, and before he knew it Garak's lips pressed hungrily over his.

They all discovered why the torture had stopped the day after. A rescue operation had proven successful, and the Defiant was soon carrying all four battered officers back to DS9.

"It was all an experiment," Ben had said angrily, his voice barely restrained. "A filthy experiment to toy with your minds. To see the results of long-term torture. The responsible party was acting behind Central Command's back ... they're all scheduled for execution." No-one asked him why he hadn't pushed for a Federation court-martial. Perhaps no-one wanted to.

And now they waited in silence, in the back compartment as they looked out their respective viewport. Dax held Kira's hand, absently stroking it as she thought of Julian ... how she'd savor those few moments with the passionate young man despite the terrible circumstances that had brought them together. She sighed softly, and kissed the Bajoran's hand sadly.

Kira smiled faintly, and glanced over at the couple huddled together on the other side. Julian was sleeping, his head resting against the Cardassian's chest, while Garak gazed thoughtfully outside. Without glancing at her, she felt his lingering thoughts in her mind. The implants had been removed, but they'd been told the links themselves would linger for a few hours still.

For your sake and mine, Major, perhaps it'd be best we forgot what transpired inside that cell.

So. No more Nerys or Kira. It was back to Major and they would slip into their roles as Bajoran and Cardassian. No. She refused to believe that. Glancing away from Garak, she looked at the stars and pursed her lips as she cuddled with the Trill. You do that. I'll always remember a special friend who helped me through a difficult time. For your sake, I'll forget his name. But never his face, she concluded, and shut her mind as she drifted to sleep inside Dax's arms.

The End