The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington
chemistry final exam.
"Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or
endothermic (absorbs heat)? Support your answer with proof."
"First,
we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So, we need to know
the rate that souls are moving into Hell and the rate they are leaving. I
think we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave.
Therefore, no souls are leaving."
"As for how many souls are entering
Hell, let's look at the different religions that exixt in the world today.
Some of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion,
you will go to Hell. Since there are more of these religions and since people
do not belong to more than one of these religions, we can project that all
people and all souls go to hell. With the birth and death rates as they are
we can expect the number of souls in hell to increase
exponentially."
"Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in
Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and
pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand as souls
are added."
"This gives us two possibilities:
1. "If hell
is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then
the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until ALL HELL BREAKS
LOOSE."
2. "Of course, if Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the
increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until
HELL FREEZES OVER."
"So which is it?"
"If we accept the
postulate given to me by Ms. Therese Banyan during my Freshman year that "It
will be a cold night in Hell before I sleep with you," and take into account
the fact that I still have not succeeded in having a sexual relationship with
her, #2 cannot be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is
exothermic."
The Student got the only A
[Mother Shiptons Prophecy] [Poetry]
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