Ah, yes, divorce, from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals
through his wallet.
-Robin Williams
Women
complain about premenstrual syndrome, but I think of it as the only time of
the month that I can be myself.
-Roseanne
Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a
place.
-Billy Crystal
According to a new
survey, women say they feel more comfortable undressing in front of men than
they do undressing in front of other women. They say that women are too
judgmental, where, of course, men are just
grateful.
-Jay Leno
In the last couple of
weeks I have seen the ads for the Wonder Bra. Is that really a problem in
this country? Men not paying enough attention to women's
breasts?
-Jay Leno
We have women in the
military, but they don't put us in the front lines. They don't know if we can
fight, if we can kill. I think we can. All the general has to do is walk over
to the women and say, "You see the enemy over there? They say you look
fat in those uniforms."
-Elayne
Boosler
There's a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that many
men are having allergic reactions to latex condoms. They say they cause
severe swelling. So what's the problem?
-Jay
Leno
When the sun comes up, I have morals
again.
-Elayne Boosler
There's very little
advice in men's magazines, because men don't think there's a lot they don't
know. Women do. Women want to learn. Men think, "I know what I'm doing, just
show me somebody naked."
-Jerry
Seinfield
Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman
I don't like and give her a house.
-Lewis
Grizzard
See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis,
and only enough blood to run one at a time.
-Robin Williams
[Mother Shiptons Prophecy] [Poetry]
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