Everybody who has a dog calls him "Rover" or "Boy". I call mine "Sex". He's
a great pal, but he has caused me a great deal of embarrassment.
When
I went to city hall to renew his dog license, I told the clerk I would like a
license for Sex. He said "I'd like one too!" Then, I said "But this is a
dog." He said he didn't care what she looked like. Then, I said. "You don't
understand. I've had Sex since I was 9 years old." He winked at me and said,
"You must have been quite a kid."
When I got married and went on my
honeymoon, I took the dog with me. I told the motel clerk that I wanted a
room for my wife and me and a special room for Sex. He said, "You don't need
a special room, As long as you pay your bill, we don't care what you
do."
One day, I entered Sex in a contest, but before the competition
began, the dog ran away. Another contestant asked me why I was just standing
there, looking disappointed. I told him I had planned to have Sex in the
contest. He told me I should have sold my own tickets.
When my wife
and I separated, we want to court to fight for custody of the dog, I said,
"Your honor, I had Sex before I was married." The judge said, "The courtroom
isn't a confessional. Stick to the case please."
Last night, Sex ran
off again, I spent hours looking for him. A cop came over to me and asked,
"What are you doing in this alley at 4 o'clock in the morning?" I told him I
was looking for Sex. My case comes up Friday.
[Mother Shiptons Prophecy] [Poetry]
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