Costello: Hey, Abbott!

Abbott:   Yes, Lou?

Costello: I just got my first computer.

Abbott:   That's great, Lou. What did you get?

Costello: A Pentium II-266, with 40 Megs of RAM, a 2.1 Gig hard drive, and a 24X CD-ROM.

Abbott:   That's terrific, Lou.

Costello: But I don't know what any of it means!

Abbott:   You will in time.

Costello: That's exactly why I'm here to see you.

Abbott:   Oh?

Costello: I heard that you're a real computer expert.

Abbott:   Well, I don't know . . .

Costello: Yes-sir-ee. You know your stuff. And you're going to train me.

Abbott:   Really?

Costello: Uh huh. And I am here for my first lesson.

Abbott:   O.K. Lou. What do want to know?

Costello: I am having no problem turning it on, but I heard that you should be very careful how you turn it off.

Abbott:   That's true.

Costello: So, here I am working on my new computer and I want to turn it off. What do I do?

Abbott:   Well, first you press the Start button, and then . . .

Costello: No, I told you I want to turn it off.

Abbott:   I know, you press the Start button . . .

Costello: Wait a second. I want to turn it Off. I know how to start it. So tell me what to do.

Abbott:   I did.

Costello: When?

Abbott:   When I told you to press the Start button.

Costello: Why should I press the Start button?

Abbott:   To shut off the computer.

Costello: I press Start to stop?

Abbott:   Well, Start doesn't actually stop the computer.

Costello: I knew it! So what do I press?

Abbott:   Start.

Costello: Start what?

Abbott:   Start button.

Costello: Start button to do what?

Abbott:   Shut down.

Costello: You don't have to get rude!

Abbott:   No, no, no! That's not what I meant.

Costello: Then say what you mean.

Abbott:   To shut down the computer, press . . .

Costello: Don't say, "Start!"

Abbott:   Then what do you want me to say?

Costello: Look, if I want to turn off the computer, I am willing to press the Stop button, the End button and Cease and Desist button, but no one in their right mind presses the Start to Stop.

Abbott:   But that's what you do.

Costello: And you probably Go at Stop signs, and Stop at green lights.

Abbott:   Don't be ridiculous.

Costello: I'm being ridiculous? Well, I think it's about time we started this conversation.

Abbott:   What are you talking about?

Costello: I am starting this conversation right now. Good-bye.

[Home] [Cards] [Friends] [Funnies] [The Letter]

[Mother Shiptons Prophecy] [Poetry]

[Guest-Sign] [Guest-View] [Email]