- After eating, do amphibians have to wait one hour before getting out of the water?

- How can there be self-help "groups"?

- If someone has a mid-life crises while playing hide & seek,
does he automatically lose because he can't find himself?

- Instead of talking to your plants, if you yelled at them, would they still grow, but only to be troubled and insecure?

- Just "before" someone gets nervous, do they experience cocoons in their stomach?

- When sign makers go on strike, is anything written on their picket signs?

- When you open a new bag of cotton balls, is the top one meant to be thrown away?

- When your pet bird sees you reading the newspaper, does he wonder why you're
sitting there, staring at carpeting?

- Where do forest rangers go to "get away from it all"?

- Why do they report power outages on TV?

- I stayed in a really old hotel last night. They sent me a wake-up letter.

- I'm taking Lamaze classes. I'm not having a baby, I'm just having trouble
breathing.

- Whenever I think of the past, it brings back so many memories.

- There's a fine line between fishing & just standing on the shore like an idiot.

- What a nice night for an evening.

- Why, in a country of free speech, are there phone bills?

- My girlfriend is weird. She asked me, "If you could know how and when you
were going to die, would you want to know?" I said, "No." She said, "Okay,
then forget it."

- When I was in high school, I got in trouble with my girlfriend's Dad. He
said, "I want my daughter back by 8:15." I said, "The middle of August? Cool!"