Here's a few things that make mediocrity great!

This list was first seen on an old National Lampoon. I just added a few things to the list. Thus, this is supposed to be humor, ok? Besides... a lot of these are (still) fun!

Hot Chocolate
Kits
Aboveground pools
Hair Weaves
Nostalgia
Sidney Sheldon
A thick vacation reading paperback
Holiday traditions
Wedding Photos
Parades
HoJo's Big Breakfast Buffet with bottomless cup of coffee
Vinyl slipcovers
Paneled playrooms
Microwave cookbooks
Professional portraits
Citronella candles
Japanese lanterns
K-Tel Records
Chili mix
Souvenirs
Having one gay friend
Christmas caroling
Jigsaw puzzles
Luncheon mats
Orange soda with 10% real juice flavor
Reciting the pledge of Allegience three, sometimes 4 times a day
The Love Unlimited Orchestra
Barbara Eden
Louis Nye
One-A-Day Brand Vitamins
Indiana
Bonnie Franklin
A pecan pie from Stuckey's
Just about anything from Stuckey's
Ac'cent meat tenderizer
Greeting cards
Thousand Island dressing
Weight Watchers
Kinney Shoes
Chi-Chi's Mexican restaurants
All-you-can-eat shrimp bars
The 70's
Winnebago vacations
Bermuda shorts
Amway
The Pillsbury Dough Boy
Keds
Kiwanis Club
4-H Club
Church Bazaars
Proms
Grange fairs
Relatives who talk about their operations over dinner
Great Britain
Junior high school
Garfield towels and sheets
Baby On Board Signs
Niagara Falls honeymoon
Seniors tours
Miss America
A crush on a Frenchman
Linoleum
Beanbag chairs
Throw pillows
Board games
E.T.
Home exercise equipment
Aerobics classes
New Year's Eve
Ye Olde Shoppe
Non dairy creamer
Ross Perot
Pictionary
Regis and Kathie Lee
Soft toilet seats
Microwavable oatmeal
"Hello, My Name Is..." nametags
Reader's Digest
National Geographic
Bruce Willis
Demi Moore
Swiss Steak
George Michael
The Jetsons

Reading Doonesbury for political insite
Saving for a mini-van
Figure Skating
Getting excited about the Olympics
Dilbert
McDonalds
Chief Wahoo
Parmatown Mall
The programming on MTV
Ïndependence Day
Renting movies at Blockbuster
Gangsta Rap
Local News Shows
Tickle Me Elmo
Microsoft software
Richard Simmons
Buying CDs from Columbia House
Psychic Friends
Pastels
Super Bowl Halftime Shows
Soap Operas
The Academy Awards
"Cathy"
Danielle Steele
Van Halen with Sammy Hagar
Wal-Mart

Mediocre Things To Say


Gee, you really can't eat just one.
It just shows to go ya.
Hang a louie.
It's like kissing your sister.
It tastes just like chicken.
Shit happens.
Life's a bitch, and then you die.
It's not the heat, it's the humidity.
If they wanna live in this country, they oughta learn the language.
It's not what you got, it's how you use it.
Sushi is an acquired taste.
What does that say about our country?
If I eat another bite I'll explode.
Just cause (s)he's married doesn't mean (s)he's not gay.
It's always funny until someone gets hurt.
TGIF
I prefer Hunan to Szechuan.
Does Eddie Murphy really have to use all those four-letter words?
Subtitles? I don't go to movies to read.
No pain, no gain.
Just say no.
I just can't party like I used to.
You just can't be sure with this AIDS thing...
He could sell ice to the Eskimos.
They're not booing, they're saying "Lou"/"Moose"/"Boog"/"Dave"/whatever.
Good pitching beats good hitting anytime.
Get a life.
He's got a snowball's chance in hell.
Nice work if you can get it.
It's a dirty job, but someone's gotta do it.
To me, sex without feelings is meaningless.
(S)He's the best thing that ever happened to me.
So how's married life treating you?
Get with the program.
Don't worry, be happy.
He must have eaten his Wheaties this morning.
Give me a break.
Have a nice day.
Can't we all just get along?