"Everyone knows that if you've got a brother, you're going to fight."
- Liam Gallagher

"Sure I love Liam, but not as much as I love Pot Noodles."
- Noel Gallagher

"I love playing music. It's a gift that was given to me by whoever dishes out these talents to people...and as long as I
believe I have something valid to put out as a piece of music then I'll keep doing it. As soon as I feel it's not, I'll stop and
do something else like open a chippy or work in a butcher's shop."
- Noel Gallagher

"Don't have a piss in the stands because I'll be standing there next week." - Soccer-mad Liam at the Maine Rd gig
(Maine Rd. is where Man. City play and is the club supported by Liam)

"Americans are crazy. They have this facination with throwing their shoes on stage. I've been to a lot shows in me life,
some good and some bad. But I was never moved to take off me shoes and throw it at the lead singer."
- Noel

"Let me try to do the interview... So tell me, what's life like being a transvestite?"
- Noel at the MTV Music Awards preshow

"My main concern before going on stage is, What frame of mind is Our Kid going to be in? Will he get fucked off and
walk off, which he is perfectly capable of doing. He was annoyed when somebody threw a rock at him at a gig, the bloke
responsible was lucky cos if we hadn't been having such a good time we'd have jumped in and put him in intensive care.
We're not the psychopaths we're made out to be but you don't take shit do you?"
- Noel

"Whoever's throwing things like this on stage...like...if you don't like the music, fuck off! If there're any more coming on,
I'm off. And you gotta deal with all these people here who are enjoying themselves. If you don't like it, go fucking hang
yourself! Don't be throwing fucking stones on stage like this...I don't wanna go blind over some fucking dickhead! This
one's called...this one's called Roll With It, dickhead!"
- Liam uses colourful language at Slane Castle after a rock was thrown at him on stage.

"Fucking Wankers! This one's for all the people at the back"
- Noel at Slane Castle

"I went to Paul McCartney's daughter Stella's party and who should open the door but the man himself. He was dead
cool. There were all these questions I wanted to ask him but I settled on, Do you watch Brookside?"
- Noel

"It is hard to be modest at times like these so I won't even try...you are all shite!"
- Noel

"Oasis got their foot in the door and kicked it down"
- John Power (Cast)

Interviewer: I have with me one of the stars of oasis...
Noel: What do you mean one of the stars?

"We're not the psychopaths we're made out to be but you don't take shit do you?"
- Noel

"I was as loud as Our Kid is...I did the same things he does every night."
- Noel before Oasis

"If you don't want to be the biggest band in the world, you may as well pack it in."
- Noel

"I told Our Kid the band was shite, but he definitely had something as a frontman. Then I said you either let me write
everything, control everything, and make all the decisions, or forget it." - Noel

"Eat more vegetables."
- Noel to Guigsy

"I was walking along and this chair came flying past me, and another, and another, and I thought, it's gonna be good
tonight."
- Liam on the joys of touring

Guitar world: There has been much talk about the quarreling between you and your brother Liam. Is that hype as well?
Noel: Yeah, a little of it is true, but the rest is just NME and Melody Maker blowing it completely out of proportion. Say
you worked for NME, and Liam comes over arguing about something, and I tell him to get lost - the next day, the
headline would be "Liam and Noel From Oasis in Hotel Brawl." (laughs)

Noel in Ireland: This one's called Hello
Liam: No it's called Howareya!

"They called it their wonderwall," explains Tommy, pointing over to the far wall "It's what they named the single after." "In
1983 they both started writing on the wall. Bits of songs, poems, favourite bands, football teams. In one corner Noel
wrote 'I Love Diane Jones' and underneath, in the same writing, 'Liam is a puff.' "They'd fight terribly about who had the
most writing space,"
- Father Gallagher (Tommy) on the REAL Wonderwall

"In Newcastle some geezer jumped up on the stage and punched me in the eye. It went off pretty bad; there was a riot at
the gig. You always get that in England. There's always someone in the front giving you the finger. Did they queue up for
six hours just to come down and call me a wanker? I don't understand that mentality. It's very strange."
- Noel
"I'm not going to play for silly yanks when I haven't got a house to live in!"
- Liam

"When we get time off from the band, everyone else goes on 'oliday, but I just start writing. I went away once over the
summer, and our management wouldn't let me take a guitar with me - they locked 'em all up. They're afraid of me burning
myself out."
- Noel

"Nothing bothers me more than when groups like Pearl Jam and Nirvana whine and moan and complain about life and
being famous. Let me tell you, being famous is great! The feeling when someone asks you for an autograph,
unbelieveable! I just think Americans are tired of people telling them how crap their lives are. I think when people listen
to our music, we tell them how good their lives could be. I guess I just can't understand the thoughts of Eddie Vedder or
that whole bit... I mean, lad, if you hate your job so much, why don't you fuckin' go work at a car wash or McDonald's
or something?"
- Noel, on MTV 1994

"Don't you hate it when they have has-beens hand out the awards at these things...(drifting off) Well, I guess I should talk
a little longer, so: I'm Rich, You're Not!"
- Noel's acceptance speech from the 1995 Brit Awards, after receiving best album award from Ex-INXS frontman
Micheal Hutchence.

"It's like a game of baseball. The press hold the ball, but you hold the bat. So they toss you the ball now and again, and
it's up to you to knock it for a home run and run around the stadium."
- Noel

They say, "How's it goin'?" and I say "Great." And then they go (affects empathetic voice), "Tch, you know what, man?
I'd really hate to be in your position, man. I mean, your life must be really hard." And I'm thinking, what? You sell two
fuckin' records in Gloucester, and you're telling me you'd hate to be in my position? I've got a fuckin' Rolls-Royce and a
fuckin' bastard mansion, and an airplane and you'd hate to be me? Ha, not as much as I'd fuckin' hate to be you, you daft
cunt -- living in a fuckin' squat with your bird and a fuckin' dog! Yeah, being a multi-millionaire is a big, bad pain in the
ass, man -- you wouldn't want to wish that on anybody.
- Noel

Noel: "What are we gonna do now?"
Musician: Spend some of your money perhaps?
Noel: Yeah, but what on? I've got everything I want. I could only go and buy two of everything now -- that just gets
boring.

"Jarvis is a star! I mean, all he did was get up on stage and get his belly out, but in England people thought it was so
shocking. It's not as if he cracked [Jackson] on the head with a baseball bat -- which is what I woulda fuckin' done if I'd
gone up there."
- Noel

"Yet again, I was right! It's a pisser being right all the time -- it bores the tits off me!"
- Noel

"This guy came up to me from some band and he said that 'Man, I'd hate to be you right now, no privacy at all' and I was
thinking, 'Sure thing man, I have a fucking Rolls Royce, a million dollars in the bank, a fucking mansion and my own jet
and you think you'd feel sorry for me? What are you? I'd hate to be you, broke as all hell living in the dole.' "
- Noel

Noel: Why don't you go downstairs and smash the bar up and say you're the singer of Oasis?
Liam: 'Cos I don't want to. If I did, there's nothing would stop me.

Dani Behr: Do you still have physical fights.
Noel: No. The last time was in March or May and we haven't done since because...
Dani Behr: Who won?
Noel: I did. He claims its because he was drunk, but I claimed I had won because I had a cricket bat in my hand.

Dani Behr: What's it like having loads of money now.
Noel: ...er...it's alright

"I do all the work so it's only right that I should get the most money. Plus I am the most handsome"
- Noel

"Next year I hope to get a stalker or two because I don't belive you've arrived until you get a stalker."
- Noel

"In Liam's world it's better to talk bullshit all day than be silent for one minute"
- Select Magazine

"Look at you, Whitey [refers to Alan White] - in the group for one year and already you got the big house and the car.
There's me, right, struggling along for fucking years and then what happens at Christmas? 'Here you are, Whitey,' goes
McGee, 'Here's your Xmas present.' And it's a car, a fucking car. 'Here you are Liam, lead singer, original member,
who's worked his arse off for years, here's yours.' Compared to you, nish, fucking nish, and you've been in the group a
year. Outrageous tackle."
- Liam

"But some bands give over eight hours for this," says the photographer. Swiftly and bluntly, Noel and Liam put him
straight on that one. "We're not some band. And your paper didn't make us, mate. And you know what about your
Rolling Stone cover? Arsed mate, arsed."
- Noel and Liam and Rolling Stone photographer after Oasis walked off after 1 hour

"What makes Oasis different?"
Bonehead: "Good songs."
Liam: "And a handsome lead singer with a beard."

"What was your biggest break?" [in music] - Jason from New York wants to know.
Liam: "My biggest break was 39" [snooker].
Bonehead: "Mine was a hole in one" [golf].

Noel orders a beer, the rest opt for lemonades and Cokes. Above us, the TV is on. CNN News. "Have you seen some
of the stories they have on here?" Noel enquires. "Check this one I saw this morning. There's this guy who's 75 and he's
got cancer. So his doctor tells him he's got about two years to live. So he thinks, 'Fuck it, I've always hated my wife, the
stupid bag.' So he kills her. 'What the fuck, I've got nothing to lose.' Then he's put in jail but, the problem is, he doesn't
die. He's 99 now and guess what he's doing?" Noel surveys our expectant faces. "Suing the doctor," he cackles. "He's
taking him to court," he continues, pissing himself. "And he's saying, ' If it wasn't for what you told me I would never have
killed my wife and now you owe me ten million pounds.' I'm sitting there thinking, 'I know I live in a mad country but it's
not half as crazy as it is here.'"
- Noel in America

"They're off their tits here."
- Liam on Americans

"Imagine if us four were walking down the street, they'd all say , 'Look at those mad fuckers with their haircuts.' When in
reality it would be them who are the nutters."
- Liam

"Now we all drink Pepsi"
- Noel after being sued by Coke

Liam: I need to be myself
Noel: I wanna be a Spaceman