Song explaination by Mark Boyle.
Some of them are real people, some are characters from TV shows. Here's the low down on a few of them...
Dig That Groove Baby
Dougy
Giro - a homeless guy Olga knew of that despite his appalling situation
was the happiest guy he knew.
Glenda- Glenda Banks was a character from the ITV soap "Crossroads"
that left the series in order to have a much publicised Test Tube Baby
- the song's name is a pun on well known Brighton punk band Peter & The
Test Tube Babies.
Singles 83/84
Alfie From The Bronx - a sad wee song, not about someone from
New York's Bronx, but the ominous nickname of the Meadow Wall council
housing estate in North Shields, which never recovered from the destruction
of the shipbuilding & engineering industries in the 1970s. There were
riots in 1991 after the death of two joy-riders.
In
common with many other areas with a "bad reputation",the politician's
answer was to leave it to rot long enough, then knock it down bit by bit
& relocate the dispossessed tenents elsewhere. It may have been a "dump",
but it was THEIR dump, and the slow clearing out of a community meant
neighbours & friends for decades were scattered apart across Tyne & Wear.
This sort of "clearence" - regarded as a last resort in the days when
"Alfie" was written - is very common today, as former council house estates
are knocked down so the council can sell the land to private housing developers.
A song that has become more relevent over time than less...
A Far Out Disc
Carol
Dodds- unlikely this was the ACTUAL name of the girl involved...as
there was a well known character called Carol Dodds in Whitburn on Tyne
& Wear. This was the same place that had the house called The Redhills
(demolished in 1963) that is scratched into the 12 inch vinyl version
of "James Bond Lives Down Our Street" ("Meet me at the Redhills").
Come Back Jackie - based on the controversy in the 1980s when a
trawler from Hull vanished in the North Sea & a Russian Submarine was
blamed for it - the rumour was that the sub had accidentally been dragged
down to the depths after the sub's periscope had become entangled in its
nets. But later reports from the investigative "Private Eye" magazine
said that the trawler had vanished in an area not known for fishing, but
known for espionage activities, and the trawler may have been deliberately
sunk & the crew captured as the Red Navy's Baltic Fleet were on manouevres
in the area.
Florence Is Deaf - basically a song in a similar vein to Splodgenessabounds'
famous hit "Two Pints Of Lager & A Packet Of Crisps Please". Olga was
actually asked by Max Splodge to join the band after lead guitarist Gary
Holton left to star in the famous 1983-4 TV Series "Auf Wiedersehen, Pet!"
Idle Gossip
Harry
Cross - Spiteful old bugger from Channel 4 soap opera "Brookside",
embittered by the death of his wife Edna. He later lost his only grandson.
Peter Practice - Not only did he own a practice place, he was also
the Toy Dolls drummer once when they were in-between drummers! Needless
to say he was not one bit pleased with this song, which is more than can
be said for the rest of us - one of the greatest Toy Dolls songs of all.
Bare Faced Cheek
Yul
Brynner - self-explanatory. Oscar winning actor famous for "The Magnificent
Seven" series of movies & "The King & I".
Anne Diamond - well known ITV Breakfast TV ("TV-AM") presenter
that was forced to quit her post after becoming pregnant to someone she
wasn't married to - a hanging offence on British TV in those days! The
baby died soon after its birth from Cot Death.
Wakey Wakey
Lester
- Lester was Lester Piggott, Britain's greatest jockey of all time (though
some would say that was Fred Archer...), who was jailed for Income Tax
evasion in 1988.
Cloughy - named after Brian Clough, a famous soccer manager that
made Nottingham Forest for a short while one of the world's most formidable
teams. The song is about the incident where he clouted two fans that had
invaded the pitch (along with others) after Forest had won an important
League Cup match in 1988 - he was afraid of the club being thrown out
of the contest as a result of their behaviour. The incident was recorded
on TV & Clough was forced to apologise publicly to the two fans, but only
after they'd apologised to him (he then gave them a kiss!). Forest went
on to win the League Cup that year & the next.
Poverty Pleadin' Peter - ...yes, it's Peter Practice again!
Fat Bob's Feet
Fat
Bob's Feet - Fat Bob was the Toy Dolls roadie from 1984 onwards, and
was with the band when they went to do "Nellie The Elephant" at Top Of
The Pops (as was Ernie, though they did not - of course - appear on stage
with them!)
The Coppers Copt Ken's Cash - One year after Lester Piggott got
the jail, legendary comedian/ventriloquist/singer Ken Dodd (last of the
music-hall style comedians) was put on trial for Income Tax evasion. Despite
overwhelming evidence (eg. rolls of banknotes found stuffed into a mattress
& in two suitcases under his bed), he was found not guilty much to everyone's
amusement. Dodd was also once a regular in the pop charts during the 1960s
- mostly doing weepy ballads. His song "Tears" is one of the biggest sellers
of all time, though he's more famous for his theme song, "Happiness".
Absurd-ditties
Ernie
Had A Hernia - funny this, on this album's release, the Toy Dolls
Newsletter of the time said it wasn't about Ernie Algar (who wrote the
newsletter!), but on this board, Olga says it was...as if we hadn't guessed!
Alec's Gone - Alec was a character in Britain's longest running
soap opera - "Coronation Street" - who was married to Bet Lynch, the manager
of the Rover's Return pub that is the hub of community life in the fictional
town of Weatherfield. He left her to return to his old job as an entertainment's
manager on cruise ships, having become bored with running a pub. Contrary
to the song, Bet was glad to be shot of him - they only married out of
convenience so they could get to keep the pub as the Brewery that owned
it preferred married couples running their pubs, though it made things
awkward when the Brewery began asking when Alec was coming back...
Jimmy Saville - A famous DJ of the 1960s & 70s on Radio 1 well
known for doing the programme "Jim'll Fix It" (a "Dreams Come True" style
show), and doing umpteen charity marathons despite being of near prehistoric
age. Is also notorious - again despite his age & his habit of smoking
cigars - to have a whole series of young girlfriends all over the UK.
Where he gets the energy from is anyone's guess!
Dez The Demon Decorator - Ernie happens to work in the painting
& decorating trade. He is qualified & experienced. This song's about one
of his business rivals that is neither. There's a lot of them about...
Orchastrated
Ivy's
Lurid Lips - Ivy Brennan was a long running character from "Coronation
Street" (as was Deirdre Barlow from the song "Deirdre's A Slag") the former
mother-in-law of monkey-mush Gail Platt. Off screen she got collagen injections
put in her lips that gave her a "trout pout". The furious TV show promptly
sacked her, & she has never worked on TV since (partly as a result of
becoming an alcoholic).
The Psychosurgery - Not so much a song about Olga's fear of dentists
as a passing tribute to one of the Toy Dolls former support bands. The
Psychosurgeons were a Bradford band led by The Doctor - Wild Willi Beckett.
Beckett was quite a character: he helped found the famous One-In-Twelve
club in Bradford that has always been a hotbed of left-wing radicalism;
he helped found the Bradford Soup Run along with John Tempest - a fiercy
apolitical homeless charity that has won numerous awards; and he was several
times a candidate & organiser for the Official Monster Raving Loony Party
in the late 1980s/early 1990s when they regularly came 4th in by-elections
& were winning council seats.
Ron Dixon Dumped D-D - two characters from the soap opera "Brookside".
Olga was being too kind about D-D!
One More Megabyte
Me
& John Williams - John Williams did (amongst other things) "Cavatina"
- the theme tune of "The Deer Hunter". Olga got the idea for the song
after his neighbour called round one time when he was practicing songs
& asked if he could join in! In their last album, they'd spoofed Andrew
Lloyd Webber calling at Olga's door to threaten him with legal action
for what they were doing to "Any Dream Will Do" (which personally I thought
was brilliant). Olga thought "what if it was John Williams that called?"...
Nobby - About Nobby Stiles, a famous England soccer player who
jigged all over the pitch when England beat West Germany 4-2 in extra
time in the 1966 World Cup final, prompting TV commentator Kenneth Wolstenholme
to make the famous comment "Just look at Nobby Stiles!"
okay, here's the final album (so far)
Anniversary Anthems
Alec's
Back - but Bet is gone! - Follow up to Alec's gone. Alec returned
to the Rover's to find the wastrels Jack & Vera Duckworth's in charge
(& doing a very good job of it). In short, he has nothing to return to.
Audrey's Alone At Last - Once again this concerns "Coronation Street."
Gold digging spendthrift Audrey (mother of monkey mush Gail Platt) had
married rich grocer Alf Roberts decades ago when he was a councillor &
future Mayor of Weatherfield. With the atypical good taste of British
soap opera script writers, Alf died in the show on the New Year's Day
special extended edition...spookily shortly before he died in real life.
When the will was read, it turned out that Alf had forgotten to renew
his life insurance policy & it had expired on New Year's Eve, so Audrey
got nothing! Worse, there was bugger all left in the will thanks to Alf
blowing the money on a Hairdressing Salon for her to run/ruin. So Audrey
was left with the prospect of having to work for a living for the rest
of her life like the rest of us!
Charlie's Watching - over on the rival soap "East Enders" is the
Dickensian figure of Dot Cotton, the bible-bashing neurotic mother of
pantomime baddie Nick Cotton. Her husband Charlie was a wastrel of the
highest order, but Dot goes on (in her battier moments) about Charlie
watching over her.
What She Had With Huey - I have to confess I've long been stumped
by this one. There was a Huw in Eastenders, but he went off to live in
a commune. Anyone know this one?
