June 8th; Monday; 4:54 PM

So... finally school's out. Time to start enjoying life to the best for 3 full months. No worry for school-work or fucked up teachers...no worry of ignorant classmates. Just good times. Days spent at the compound watching the guys skate the half-pipe, watching Lee bust his ass trying kick-flips at the top. Little Armand better than all the rest. Chillin' at friends houses watching movies and playing Fire.. Playing Fire while watchin KIDZ.. that kicks ass. Sublime continuously turned way up on the stereo, Shouting to be heard. Nights spent staring at stars or clubbing where the punk bands can be heard. Having fun with different guys. Never going too far, but going far enough to find the pleasure. Talking about fears, talking about life.. feelin' the good times becoming real again. Working 6 hours a week.. weekends only. Enough to bring 20 bucks in a week. Good enough for me, never asking too much. Some days you sit in someone's house in someone's room, with 15 other people. Looking around seeing the couples do their thing, sometimes taking off to another room to be alone for awhile. They're always back after a half hour or so though. Seeing the guys joking around, Robert and Adam doing the gay routine even though they claim to be straight. Catching the laughs and stares from the rest. It's only a show, but we still wonder. It's all cool though. No room for discrimination. Chris usually hanging on some girl.. often enough found to be me. Not that I mind.. Mexican Joe and Little Armand, sitting together sharing a cigerrette or once in awhile a joint. A knock at the door.. shuffling of feet, it's Scott usually. Stoned as always, a trip to watch...always the center of attention. Other days you find yourself alone in a room with a guy, laughter and voices heard in the room next door. Laying on the bed, just talking at first. Then the kissing and it goes even farther.. but only to a certain point. It's never too far. No risk, No fear.. Just fun.

Schools back in. Different than last year, different place, different people. Better classes and cooler people. Having fun with TV Production, stressing about Chemistry. Not too worried about the rest. Searching for that group, that clique, to be with for the year. Thinking about the guys, wondering about the grades.
A Typical Day :
Waking up at 6:15, catching a ride at 7:15 with mom to the school, walking around til 1st period.. Things go slow until 3rd period.. Spanish class. The clown (SPanKy) makes things fun. TV Production...camera's, lights...that one guy. After 6th, leaving at 1:45, riding with Parramore... Finally home. Catch a movie, get some dinner.. talk to that guy... Just having fun.

It's been awhile since I've written, more than a year. wow. Life is different, I'm in school, graduating next year....Vice-President of the National Honor Society.. I still love Marilyn Manson... but Fugazi is another of my favorites.. I've written a lot more poetry..started on a story. I want to major in either Journalism or Advertising when I go off to college.. I hope to be accepted to the University of Florida..