Qwotz

Hello all of you techno-nerds out their, I know it's hard to believe, but their is someone in the Simpson's hometown even more stupid than home. His name is Ralph Wiggum. Ralph is the police chief's son and is in Mrs. Hoover's second grade class (and probably will be for the next ten years). So if you haven't left yet (you don't have any life either) without much further ado, we proudly (and we use the term loosely) present everyone's favorite paste eating pimp-dad...

Ralphilisous Quotes

• 'I'm Idaho!'
• 'I bent my Wookie.'
• 'It says 'bee' and there's a picture of bee on it.'
• 'Can you cook my dinner for me? my parents aren't around and I'm not allowed to use the stove.'
• 'It said 'Choo-choo-choose you, and there's a picture of a train.'
• 'I saw Principle Skinner and Mrs. Krobapple in the closet making babies, and I saw one of the babies, and one of the babies looked at me!!!'
• ' What's a battle?'
• 'My cat's name is mittens!'
• 'I think I wet my bed!'
• 'I beat the smart kids! I beat the smart kids!
• 'Me fail English? That's umpossible.'
• 'What's a diorama?'
• 'My cat's breath smells like cat food!'
• 'The tar fumes are making me dizzy.'
• 'My parents won't let me use scissors.
• 'Mrs. Hoover, I don't have a red crayon...I ate it.'
• 'Mrs. Hoover, I glued my head to my shoulder.'
• 'So,...do you like...stuff.'
• 'Yes, but what man could tame her?'
• 'I asked for no broth. Now away with you, less my cane find your back side.'
• '...and the doctor said I wouldn't have anymore nose bleeds, if I just kept my finger out of there.'
• 'I sleep in a drawer!'*
• 'These tar fumes are making me dizzy.'
• '...sothe doctor said I wouldn't have any more nose bleeds if I kept my finger out of their.'
• 'Mrs. Hoover, which one is one?'
• Mrs. Hoover, which one is oral?"
• Mrs. Hoover, my worm crawled in my mouth, and I ate it. Can I have a new one?'
• 'No Mrs. Hoover, I'm Ralph!'
• 'Oh boy, sleep! That's where I'm a Viking!'
• 'You're going to heaven.'
• 'I'm special!'
• 'I can't believe I used to go out with you!'
• 'Very Wrigely'
• 'What's for lunch tommarow?'
• 'Chicken Necks?'
• 'Dear Mrs. Hoover, You have lime disease. We miss you. Kevin's biting me. Come back soon. Here is a picture of a 'Spirokeet'. Love, Ralph'

Homer's Mmmm's

• And now the runner up for Springfield's dumbest male (trust me, it was some tough compition)... Homer Simpson! So, to celebrate I have compiled a list of the main man's Mmmm quotes. The Mmmm quotes are what Homer says when he has a craving for something.
• 'Mmmm, free goo.
• Mmmm, sacrilicious.
• Mmmm, invisible cola.
• Mmmm, money
• Mmmm, burger
• Mmmm, foot-long chili dog.
• Mmmm, fatty.
• Mmmm, waffle run off.
• Mmmm, snouts.
• Mmmm, chocolate.
• Mmmm, gummy Venus.
• Mmmm, floor pie.
• Mmmm, Marge.
• Mmmm hamburger.
• Mmmm, purple.
• Mmmm, bowling fresh.
• Mmmm, elephant fresh.
• Mmmm, slanty.
• Mmmm, open-faced club sandwedge.
• Mmmm, shrimp.
• Mmmm, mediciney.
• Mmmm, bacon.
• Mmmm, invisible cola.
• Mmmm,organized crime.
• Mmmm, ham.
• Mmmm, bar-b-que.
• Mmmm, fuzzy.
• Mmmm, crumbled up cookie things.
• Mmmm, urinal fresh.
• Mmmm, forbidden doughnut
• Mmmm, pinch.
• Mmmm sprinkles.
• Mmmm, something.
• Mmmm, unprossed fish sticks.
• Mmmm, I can feel three kinds of softness.
• Mmmm, Hors d'oeurves.
• Mmmm, incapacitating.
• Mmmm, pointy.
• Mmmm, fuzzy.
• Mmmm, 64 slices of American Cheese.
• Mmmm, hog fat
• Mmmm, spagetti.
• Mmmm, soylent green.**'

Homer's Do'oh's

• 'Do'oh
• Do'oh
• Do'oh
• Do'oh
• Do'oh
• Do'oh
• Do'oh
• Do'oh
• Do'oh
• Do'oh
• Do'oh
• Do'oh
• Do'oh
• Do'oh
• Do'oh
• Do'oh
• Do'oh
• Do'oh
• Do'oh
• Do'oh
• Do'oh
• Do'oh
• Do'oh
• Do'oh
• Do'eth
• Do'oh the pain. Do'oh the pain of it all.'

Do you have some more quotes for me? Was this page just a really crappy idea? b-dog@mindless.com

I wanna go home!

* Not really Ralph, but it was his voice!

**It's from the Movie Logan's Run. It's what they made the old people into after they died.