Will you take Christopher Kirkpatrick to be your virtual wedded husband? Will you love him, comfort him, honor, and keep him in sickness and in health until death do you part? Will you put up with endless hours of humorless jokes, and being thrown out of any public place? If you answered yes, repeat after us, Ashlee, Jen, Rachel, & Shannon, your virtual ministers...
I, _________, take you, for my virtual lawful husband, to have to hold, from this day forward, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do us part.