Welcome to the Monkeytennis Guestbook! Please talk out of your arse!
Sparkly New Entries at Top, Crusty Old Entries at Bottom

Pammy - 09/13/00 19:31:39
Location: L.A

Comments:
Hey guys thought i'd drop you a line as david (Hasselhoff) told me your band was great. Just shows that what they are saying about him is true...he does talk a load of shit! Hahahahaha only kidding honest i value you more than my fake boobs!

richard D! - 05/06/00 16:25:05
My Email:richie@rderbyshire.freeserve.co.uk
Location: OXFORD

Comments:
Wow you have fans all over the world! Keep it real guys

James Stark - 04/01/00 21:27:07

Comments:
Well I listed to your song. It's not bad for a band who comes from Camelford

But if you want any suggestions about it. I could say it was a bit uninteresting and ordinary. If you sung using a different type of voice then people would find the songs more interesting. I'm not saying that you should be like Macy Gray or even for t at matter sing in a strong Cornish accent but if you listen to any of the bands who are in the same style as you, the singer always has a distinguishable voice like The Manics or The Stereophonics. It helps with them because they are Welsh. It's up to you on this one but it might be quite interesting

Secondly, another way to make your songs a bit better is get your producer or whoever it is to be more experimental. Use more synthesiser effects and even sound effects that you don't often hear in certain music. There are probably no very good recordi g studios in deepest Cornwall but give it a try. If you had a budget of 5 grand then you could probably do some really good stuff, but I know its quite difficult to have this amount of cash in a less developed part of Britain

I've probably said the most useful thing on this guestbook. Please listen to it

and lastly if all this is just a hobby, then you can afford to ignore all I've said. I'm probably too ambitious anyway

James Stark - 04/01/00 21:00:14
My Email:say.ooh.la.la@budweiser.com
Location: Now in Cornwall

Comments:
Hi Joel. Remember me. I see you've gone to great lengths to look different since I last saw you with a beard Have you lost all your conservativity now or is that the influence of hanging around with the other members of the band I'm downloading your only song now but I think it was great that you started up a band But I left SJS so I could really continue with my music. Could I ever get involved with anything that you're doing. You're hearing the words of a person who took Grade 8 in Piano in Summer '99 If you really want to email me. (some things could happen) then send it to here

Boy Fradley - 03/16/00 10:24:44
My Email:gibon69@yahoo.com

Comments:
My God! My juices are pouring after seeing a monster like that! Shit, help me I'm drowning in my own cum, Blub,Blub,Blub,Gargle. Ahhhhhh, that's better! See you soon matey hope falmouth is all it's cracked up to be, and I'll be back onb the first of june. br>
wess jackson - 03/13/00 20:33:51
My Email:www.craftsman @netline.co.uk
Location: macclesfield,cheshire.

Comments:
I AM A LIKE MINDED INDIVIDUAL FROM THE HOME OF THE INFAMOUS MACC LADS.WHOM I KNOW A FEW OF.I,VE BEEN GOING ON ABOUT MONKEYTENNIS FOR YEARS.I DONT KNOW WHERE IT CAME FROM I JUST STARTED GOING ABOUT IT JUST FOR THE SAKE OF IT.AND ONE NIGHT I DECIDED TO PUT HE SAYING MONKEY TENNIS IN AND PRESS SEARCH,AND HEY PRESTO YOU LOT APPEARED FROM NOWHERE.I WAS FUCKING FLABBERGASTED.I,VE NEVER LAUGHED SO MUCH IN MY LIFE.YOU LOT ARE FANTASTIC.I,M A BIG MUSIC FAN WHO ALSO IS A GUY WHO WANTS TO SING IN A BAND.BUT AS OF YE HAVE NOT YET HAD AN OPPORTUNITY TO.THANKYOU YOU HAVE MADE MY LIFE COMPLETE.NOW I KNOW THERE IS ANOTHER MONKEYTENNIS FANATIC.YOUR WEBSITE IS AMAZING.GOOD WORK LADS I HOPE YOU GET IN TOUCH.WE,LL JUST TALK MONKEY TENNIS FOR A WHILE.YOU KNOW SILVERBACK WREST ING.I USED TO BE WORLD SILVERBACK WRESTLING CHAMP.3 YEARS RUNNING.HOLD THE W.F.S BELT.COULD NEVER BEAT THOSE FUCKING MARMAZETTES AT TENNIS THOUGH.NIPPY LITTLE FUCKERS.AH WELL I SUPPOSE THEY GOT TO BE BETTER AT SOMETHING.I DID ONCE BEAT A SPIDER MONKEY 3 S TS TO 1.ONLY THE ONCE THOUGH.I WANT TO HEAR YOUR TUNES BUT I HAVE NO MP3 PLAYER.SIGNING OFF LADS.ONCE AGAIN CHEERS ANDTRY SILVERBACK WRESTLING IT KEEPS YOU FIT.

wess jackson - 03/13/00 20:23:30

Comments:


techgrrrl - 02/15/00 03:09:41
My URL:http://www.softcom.net/users/myalias
My Email:techgrrrl_99@yahoo.com
Location: In the library with the candlestick

Comments:
MY GOD MAN, IS THAT THING REAL BEN? =0 How the hell do you walk with that thing in your pants? Is this the reasons why americans are always drinking imported beer? It must be something in the water! Yeah...umm...I'm ganna leave now......

owen - 02/14/00 16:30:47

Comments:
ben isn't andy a waste of space?

Austin and Felicity - 11/30/99 13:11:50
My Email:TOP SECRET
Location: North Cornwall

Comments:
We are British intelligence and we have evidence that Jxxx is a Transvestite, yes that's right we have PICTURES!!!!!!!!

Andy - 11/15/99 10:39:44
My Email:andynw99@hotmail.com
Location: Truro College

Comments:
Ben is a bit of a weird fella. I am thinking of leaving this course, or maybe the country, to get away from him. Haven't met the other two, but they've gotta be weird by association!

11/04/99 09:42:11
Name: Girls of ICQ My URL: Visit Me
My Email: Email Me

Comments:
Just surfing and came accross your page Thanks


Anthony Treasurer - 10/18/99 12:22:12
My URL:http://www.antnet.freeserve.co.uk
My Email:anttreas@yahoo.com
Location: Cornwall

Comments:
Hi Mr Mellor! Not what I would expect from my R.E. Teacher! I love your song, Very good. Ant

keith & Barry - 10/04/99 09:34:18
My Email:weithweave@excite.com

Comments:
We like you Nickelkitten You make the best music we have heard in many years. This guy will go far. Monkey tennis is a right pile of self indulgent crap though. Keep up the good work Ben my son!! PS we would both LOVE to team up with you some time BIG boy

beer mat lover!!! - 08/08/99 11:06:01
My Email:beer uk
Location: fosters

Comments:
We have had many close encounters of the third kind with this gang of monkeys, but never before have I seen a sight as riDICKulous as a monkey literally playing a whole new version of tennis... with himself at St. Breward Aviaries

M.K.Hardy B.Eng (Hons) - 07/22/99 14:55:52
My URL:http://titsandarse.gardentool.com
My Email:ex5153@qmw.ac.uk
Location: somwhere in London

Comments:
I hope my downloads put us at number 1 in the mp3 charts. What a fucking carry-on. Love, Matt......

Chantelle Frnacis - 06/28/99 10:10:24
My Email:kitten_19_1999@hotmail.com
Location: Cornwall

Comments:
Well boys if the music doesn't hit off then a good comedy act will. It had us all in sitches, so if people from all over Cornwall come laughing u can't blame me. Oh yeah and I am sorry Joel none of this with take away the pressure of the New Year antics. love ya.

Chickerino (leader of the Chickens and killer of many goats) - and foolish guitarist from AphiD - 06/27/99 23:21:13
My URL:http://www.users.globalnet.co.uk/~mushlet/
My Email:fuzzy@mushlet.globalnet.co.uk
Location: England

Comments:
Come dear chickens, we have found a worthy dwelling for the night. Perhaps in the morn we will recruit these monkies and turn them into real chicken brethren. Then we go and we take up arms against the most evil goat and together we crush them. BWAWAAHAHA HAHAH. Yes indeed. They have proved themselves a most excellent band indeed. However this does not mean they fight like the mighty chicken. Your final test will be on the battlefield against the evil goat. Perhaps you may hit it with a guitar or prod it m ny times with a drumstick. Yes that would be excellent. Surely with you we cannot fail. Goodbye, May the goats continue being pointless, May you continue being an eeeexcellent band, Chickerino (6th hutch platoon - Royal Chicken Army) P.S. I apologise for all of this many times.

josh - 06/23/99 21:32:33
My URL:http://www.angelfire.com/ny2/xrootdownx/index.html
Location: ARABIA

Comments:
UH I'M JUST CONFUSED HERE.

gorgeous babe - 06/22/99 11:27:30
My Email:stoopid_freek@hotmail.com
Location: manchester

Comments:
gimmie some more u porn stars!!!!!!!!

katie - 06/21/99 11:29:59
My Email:tsarchasm@hotmail.com
Location: i am your nextdoor neibour

Comments:
hellooooo its katie here i am glad that your penis enhancement operation went well see ya monkey tennis is a cool name but pity about the picture of joel

Phillip mike Hunt - 06/20/99 11:31:29
My Email:phill@hunt.com
Location: Manchester

Comments:
Well, Well, Well, monkey tennis you are amazing. Remember that time i saw you live and the bass player started getting friskey with the sheep. God, that night was good. Cheers. Phil Mike Hunt


AD up the arse! - 06/19/99 18:23:53
Location: in the cottage

Comments:
Just to say that I think this has to be one of the friskiest and sexually exciting sites I have seen to date, Ben 'MY BOY',you are still hung like an ox and have the looks to stun thousands! Will worship you forever!! Your favourite stud muffin. XXXXXXXXXXXX


David Hasselhoff - 06/18/99 17:36:57
My Email:Davie.baby@baywatch.com
Location: The Hot Sunny California Coast

Comments:
Hey Guys! Thought i'd drop you a line after seeing you play over here last year! Hope you are all ok! Keep ROCKIN'!! cheers DH ps.Look out for my new TV show


A Friend - 06/17/99 21:14:03
My Email:OJSimpson@backslash.forwardslash.escape
Location: in a car on the freeway

Comments:
I have pictures of your Bass player not only inserting garden tools into his anus, but also all the zimmer frames and apricots he couldfind. Forward the sum of £1,000,000 to the above e-mail account or the negatives will be copied many times over and sent to all the music magazines all over the world, ending your career for ever. A friend ps I'll settle for the hand shandy if you can't find the money.


em&ad - 06/17/99 17:54:36
Location: cornwall

Comments:
what fine selection of primates you are. monkeytennis is not going to know what has hit it when you three contend for the wimboldon cup.


Monkeytennis - 06/17/99 00:59:45
My URL:You're here!
My Email:monkeytennis@freenet.co.uk
Location: Engerland

Comments:
Hello and welcome to the cosy world of Monkeytennis! Please fill this guestbook up with your thoughts, ramblings and sexual desires.