"Sabotage Me"

A poem.

I hate those thoughts that
Keep me
Up at night. Wishing
I were there.
Wishing I were then.
Waking me
Up just to tell me I'm
Not worthy, not worthy
Of sunlight, of
Dedication, of this life. I hate the
Guilt I feel. I
Hate knowing how much I
Deserve it. It scares me.
I hate that I
Now have learned so much, come so
Far
For what? Too late.
Apologize for the hurt, no, the
Damage has all been done. What
Can I do?
I can break.
I hate being angry at a world
Which did nothing
But allow me into it. And that is enough.
I hate me for
Sabotage.
I hate it all for destroying
The strength that once so characterized me
Defined me
Became my soul...where did that
Girl go? Where?

-copyright 2003 White Gardenia Music
Words by Bree Dunsmore
All rights reserved.

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