chapter sevenI flipped the controls for the shower off and stepped out of the shower, wrapping a towel around my shoulders. I opened the door of the bathroom, and made a dash for my room. At six ‘o clock on a Saturday morning, I doubted anyone would be up, but I had gotten into the habit of running for my room. After towelling myself dry, I slipped on a pair of tracksuit pants and an old grey t-shirt before making the trip down the stairs to the kitchen. This has been my Saturday morning ritual for as long as I can remember. I always get up at a ridiculous hour and watch the kid’s cartoons on the cartoon network, at the same time eating fruit loops. I’m not sure why, but ever since I was a child I loved the time in the morning when there’s still no-one around outside, no people mowing lawns, or any of the usual Saturday morning jobs. And cartoons just make it all the more better. This Saturday, however, I didn’t really pay much attention to the cartoons. That early in the day is also a good time for thinking. No-one else is around to disturb your thoughts. And right in the centre of mine was Taylor. He was so perfect, so…..well, just beautiful. But I couldn’t help thinking that some day it had to end. For three months now, we had seen each other almost every day. And I enjoyed our time together more than anything in the world, but lately Tay had seemed, well, distant. Like it didn’t really matter to him any more if we were together or not. He hadn’t said so in as many words, but I could see it in his eyes, in the way he spoke to me. And it was breaking my heart. I knew, somewhere in the back of my mind, that he had probably had hundreds of girlfriends, and that one day he would want to move on. But I had tried to delude myself by thinking that I was different, that he really cared for me. But the way he was acting, I couldn’t pretend anymore. I decided it was time to break it up, before I truly fell in love with him.
* * * * * Taylor threw himself onto the green bedspread that covered his bed. "Ike, it sucks! Why can’t I have a damn girlfriend? For God’s sake, just because we’re famous doesn’t mean we can’t have fun!"
Isaac gave his little bro’ a sympathetic look. "I know how you must feel, Tay, but you have to remember the fans got us where we are today. If this thing with Rhian gets out, who knows what would happen? you have to be realistic, Tay."
Taylor groaned. "I just - I really like her, you know? And I can tell she’s realised something’s up in the last few weeks. She doesn’t look at me the same. It’s like she can tell I’m building up to something. I hate it. She looks so hurt when I say I can’t go out or something. God, Isaac, I think I’m falling in love with her." Tay suddenly realised what he’d just said, and immediately wished he’d kept his mouth shut.
Isaac looked shocked. "Tay, you’re only 14! You are not in love!" Tay buried his head in his pillow.
"Just leave, Isaac, okay? I need to think" Ike gave Tay one last look, before leaving the room.
After he was sure Ike had left, he sat up on the bed and propped his pillow up against the wall. He cleared his throat.
"Rhian," he began, addressing the pillow, "I really don’t know how to say this, but.." He was nervous, he suddenly realised. Nervous of talking to a pillow! He swallowed, and started again: "Well, I think it’s best if, we, you know, uhhh, don’t see each other any more. I - I just want to be friends." He tried a convincing smile at the pillow, and just as he was about to start over, Zac said from behind him,
"Tay, I knew it was going to happen someday….but so young…." Zac gave Tay a sympathetic look, and then called down the hall; "Mom! It’s finally happened --- Tay’s talking to pillows!" The offending pillow hit Zac in the face about three seconds later.
"Hey!" Zac cried, as he returned the throw, "What’s with you, Tay? I was just having some fun! Sheesh!" He said as he turned to leave the room. Tay watched him go, and then muttered at the door, "we’re not allowed to have fun anymore, Zac," before flopping on the bed again.
* * * * * "Morning, Rhian," Ellie said as she walked into the living room. I glanced at my watch - 8 am - and looked over my shoulder at her.
"You’re up early, Ellie! Are you feeling okay?" I asked, feigning concern.
"Oh, ha ha," she mumbled as she slumped beside me on the couch, "I heard you moving about, and I decided to come talk to you - without Mom or Dad around." I turned my eyes from the tv screen to Ellie, and said "Okay, what’s up?"
She shifted her position - I noticed she was still wearing her PJs and said "It’s about you and Taylor." I gave her an innocent look. "About who?"
"Nice try, Rhi - your Romeo, remember?" Ellie had only met Taylor once - when he’d come over to watch a movie - but she still felt as though she was the guardian angel of our relationship, for some weird reason. I guessed she was just trying to fulfil her duty as ‘older sister’. She grabbed the remote off me, and switched the tv off.
"Hey! I was watching that!"
"Ellie," she said, ignoring my attempts to retrieve the remote, "How come you guys aren’t going out as much? Is there something wrong?" I immediately turned away, and muttered, "He’s been real busy with their new album, is all" I said, trying not to look her in the eye. Ellie has this uncanny way of knowing when you’re lying, just from your eyes. She’d perfected the technique with me.
"Don’t lie to me, Rhian - What’s up?" I turned back to her, and could feel tears welling up in my eyes. "Nothing! It’ nothing, okay?" It was no use, my efforts were futile, and pretty soon tears were rolling down my cheeks. "Oh, Rhian -" Ellie said, reaching over and hugging me. "You can tell me…what is it?" I sobbed into her shoulder.
"He doesn’t like me any more, Ell. It’s like he can’t stand to be around me! I hate it!" She rocked me for a moment, before saying, "Rhian, you have to remember that his music is a huge part of his life - you must have realised that one day, well, he was gonna break it up." I looked up. She was right, I knew, although I didn’t want to believe it.
"I know, I know - but I thought it would be different, you know? I thought he really cared." She pushed me back a bit, so she could look me in the eye. "Rhian, he’s famous - one day, this whole thing is gonna get out, and people are never going to look at you the same. Would you be content just being ‘Taylor Hanson’s girlfriend’?" I had to think about that one. I had a hundred plans for my future - did I really want to have to rely on Taylor’s fame to get me where I wanted to go? No, I answered myself. I wanted to be my own person, to make my own fame. I looked up at her. "You know, Ellie, sometimes I really like having you as my sister." She grinned. "Well, I try." She looked at me again, "Are you going to be okay now?" I nodded, sniffling. "Good." She smiled, and then suddenly looked thoughtful. "So you’re going to break it up yourself?" She questioned. I nodded. "Yes." Even as I listened to myself, I realised I sounded very determined. That was not how I felt. Breaking up with Tay was going to be the hardest thing I had done in a looong time.