Insane Fiction 
chapter 1
by Ku-chan and Kemuri-dono


Insane Fiction
Chapter 1: "Money, the source of all problems."

Original idea by: Ku-Chan
Editor: Kemuri dono

*standard disclaimers apply*


Ku-Chan: Oh, please! Someone please kill me before I finish this....
Youko Yanin: Iie iie... I won't let anyone harm you till this fic is done.
Ku-Chan: Kemuri dono will get me once I complete it.
Youko Yanin: That's your problem. Get on with it!
Kemuri Dono: Before you go on, I'd like to inform you that this is going to a multiple crossover, including characters from Weiss Kreuz, YYH,Inu Yasha, as well as RK. (Fan reaction: O.O) With that settled, we hope you enjoy this meager offering of reading material. See ya at the bottom of the page!..if you don't die of boredom halfway that is...


It was a bright sunny morning. Uh ,let me rephrase that...It was a VERY bright and VERY sunny morning with the sun beating every single lifeform mercilessly to the ground. People were crawling on all fours, practically cooking to death under the sweltering heat. It was mid June, and summer had really smacked Japan in the face. Heck, even lawyers were committing suicide because hell was colder. Everyone seemed to be cursing the heavens for allowing such scorching temperatures to befall them. Well, everyone except Minamino Shuuichi a.k.a. Kurama that is.Camera pans over to a lone figure, hair tied up in a loose pony tail, its colour constrasting greatly with the white fabric of his shirt. Oddly enough, the heat didn't seem to affect the latter at all.

Kurama walked along the brick laid pavement, enjoying the sun's rays on his skin. He had to admit, he simply loved the sun, as it provided his plants energy. Sure, it did make his ningen form a tad uncomfortable; but if it did his plants good, he didn't mind.

Anyway, Kurama's plans for the day were to go and withdraw some money from the bank. His wallet was already becoming a moth motel as well as a home for other unwelcome visitors. He frowned slightly as his thoughts wandered back to the night before.

.: I /knew/ I shouldn't have gone out for dinner with the gang last night. Somehow /I/ always end up paying the bill...*sigh*..:.

And so, he set off, hardly taking notice of the amount of people (who had so dared to step into the sunshine) burst into flames...



Outside a hospital...

.: Damn. Where exactly am I gonna find money? Beg? NO! Steal? Em... That'll ruin my reputation! Gah! Who's freakin' idea was it to renovate the shop anyway ?! Contractors aren't cheap ya know..! Persia has been silent for the past month...ARGH! If I don't find some money fast, the
hospital won't treat my sister anymore!:.

Removing his shades, the young man in his early twenties stared into the sky as if seeking an answer to his predicament. A gentle warm breeze brushed against his face, gently whipping his red side locks back and forth. His handsome features earned a few excited squeals from schoolgirls as they passed him by. The redhead stood there with his eyes closed, floating somewhere in between the state of fantasy and consciousness. When he reopened them, a white dove flew overhead. A sign of good fortune from the heavens perhaps? He allowed a tiny smile to creep up his face..until he realized the little bird's parting gift was no blessing from above.

*sploot*

"..........!!! "

Wiping the 'gift' off with his handkerchief, he quickly reapplied his shades and continued walking. Oddly enough, the young man's face betrayed none of his inner emotions as he trudged on, but who was to know anyway? Silently, he made his way to the bank in an attempt to
find some loose change... of the papery kind, of course.
\]


Back to Kurama...

.: Okay... Got my money, now to get the monthly groceries for 'kaa san:.

Looking at his newly attained expenses, Kurama inwardly rejoiced. Finally his wallet was at starting to actually look like one! He was just about to put his wallet into his pocket when a red and brown figure blurred past him.

.:Hiei? No, it can't be. I don't sense his youki anywhere..:.

Overcoming the slight shock, he shook his head slightly. Maybe the heat was getting to him. Unconsciously, his fist tightened its grip on ....?

.: ..EH?!:.

He stared at his empty hand, his jaw collapsing onto the floor. Slowly, he turned his head towards the rapidly fading form of a running redhead in a brown coat... with /his/ wallet. There and then, the irony of the situation struck him like a 2 tonne bus. Normally, the Kurama we all know and love would be trying to identify the thief, doing a quick yet thorough calculation and then strategically cornering the unsuspecting culprit at some unknown point yadda yadda yadda. But this time, cranky human-who-was-dying-under-the-sun Minamino Shuuichi was here to
stay. A notorious thief's possession stolen from right under his nose? Irony indeed. Unable to hold on to his nerves, something snapped in him - thus unleashing the dogs of hell..

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooo~~~!!!"


*******


.: Why am I doing this?! I'm STEALING !!

It's all for your sister...isn't that reason enough ?

NO! I'm the good guy!And good guys are /not/ supposed to do this! I must return it !

.....and watch your sister die?

Argh !God dammit! Can't make up my mind!!:.


"HEY~~!!! Come_Back_With_My_WALLET!!!"

Kurama gritted his teeth in frustration. Really, who wouldn't be after allowing their money to be stolen and having to chase the culprit halfway around the country in this kind of weather? Anyway, the redhead swathed in brown turned sharply into an alley, only to discover a brick wall staring right back at him....Crap. As he was about to backtrack, the latter suddenly realized his other route was blocked off as well, by a particularly ticked off bishounen. Unable to run anymore, Aya leaned onto the nearest wall for support, too tired to face his opponent.

"Give_IT_BACK !!!!"

.: That sounds like a ..a GIRL !!?? I was caught by a mere /GIRL/ ?!! OH MY GOD !!:.

Kurama advanced slowly towards Aya, both bearing unreadable expressions on their faces..besides the obvious anger and growing hysteria of course. Finally as a last ditch effort, the leader of the Weiss Kreuz jumped and landed on one of the windowsills. The half youko looked up in
awe, momentarily forgetting the issue at hand. He never knew a ningen could jump /that/ high. That window had to be at least ten feet high! But his expression quickly changed when something resembling a flowerpot flew out of the window and whacked the other red head square in the
face, the resulting sound loud enough to make Kurama wince. It seems that our dear Aya had accidentally intruded into a couple who were busy ...er..having fun. [ Now, now, not in front of the young 'uns..- KD]

Being a nine tailed fox youko that had lived for a thousand odd years, Kurama had always come to rely on his sharp senses and basic instincts when involved in situations like these. Now, a rather heavy looking person was dropping from the sky presumably on top of him. No problem, now all he had to do was follow the instinct of stepping aside thus saving him from any bodily..

.:....SHIIIITTT...!!! :.

* WHOMP! *

...nevermind.


********

.: oof... That was a soft landing:.

A muffled groan came from below, cutting short Aya's moment of relief. The fallen one quickly got up and turned behind. On the ground laid the other redhead, knocked out cold, 'her' front towards the hard stone ground. Dusting his sleeve, Aya then noticed the wallet beside 'her'. He
picked it up, and with a final glance, sauntered out of the narrow lane. The latter continued walking until he reached the hospital grounds where his sister was. Although he was already quite a distance away from where the confrontation occurred, his conscience still plagued his thoughts.

.: This money.../her/ money, I'm just going to borrow a bit. Then I'll return it to her..:.

He started climbing up the steps towards the entrance.

.: Demo...what if she is injured?:.

Aya stood there,a war taking place within the depths of his mind. Slowly, he took one step down the staircase. And another . And another. Soon, his strides broke into a run as he hurried back to where he had left the unconscious one.



Kurama stirred, enjoying the covers of softness that seemed to enfold him in its peaceful embrace. It seemed as though he was drifting among the clouds, without a single care in the world. Even the whole wallet incident had left his mind for that short moment in time. The youko dreamt that he was back in the Makai, the large trees offering shelter to those who dwelled on the ground, the sounds of crickets and other forest animals echoing throughout the forest. He was home now, all his ningen burdens completely stripped of him. He was at peace...until...

"Aayyyyyyyyyyaaaa~~~ It's mine!It's mine!It's mine~~"

"This is not yours, Omi! It belongs to the redhead girl!"

*stab*

.: Girl?!!:.

"I don't care! Finders keepers!!!"

*stab stab stab *

"Oi! What's all this fighting about? Hey, whose wallet is this?"

"Give it back, Yohji!"

"Whoa! ¥1 000 000 000! Woohoo! It's pub-hopping time! ^0^"

*stab stab stab stab stab stab stab stab stab *

Kurama felt thousands of verbal daggers stabbing him mercilessly as the foursome continued their argument on the other side of the door. Just who the hell did they think they were?! THAT wallet with THAT money was HIS! Not THEIRS! His eyes opened, green orbs flashing with
pure malice. The pillow tossed harshly aside, Kurama kicked away the blanket; ready to thrash those who actually dared to lay their hands on his wallet. Let us stress the fact that he WAS a youko thief in his previous life-and that taking his possessions would be considered an act of
either suicide or pure idiocy.

Anger fuelling his movements, he tore himself from the bed and started walking blindly in the dark towards the source of his soon-to-be plant fertilizer. As he groped around for a light switch, his right foot kicked something hard. A sharp pain shot up his ankle, resulting the redhead half youko to collapse onto the carpeted floor grunting in pain. His ankle had hurt more than it should have. Kurama sweared inwardly, his hands reflexively reaching to rub his aching ankle as he struggled to get himself into sitting position. The idea of unleashing his deadliest plants was beginning to be /very/ tempting. Suddenly with the click of a door knob and a soft creak, afternoon light eagerly streamed into the confines of the previously gloomy room, blinding the youko with its brilliance.

He shielded his eyes with his left arm, squinting at the tall figure that stood aloof at the doorway. Wanting to know just exactly who the shadowy figure was, Kurama furiously rubbed his eyes and blinked a couple of times, hoping to adjust them to the sudden arrival of light.
When he finally managed to focus properly, he found himself staring face to face with the best blond womanizer in the entire galaxy, Kudou Yohji.

"Well, /Hello/ there, gorgeous..! Where have /you/ been all my life? No time to lose! Let's get to it, baby!"

.:INARI~~!!! This freak sounded so much like that freakazoid crow!!:.

"Stay away from me!"

Thanks to his sprained ankle, Kurama's ningen form was unable to avoid Yohji's advances. Without much effort,Yohji pinned him down to the floor, pressing both his wrists against the carpet material. The blonde was about to start his pathetic game of womanizing when a sandy
brown haired kid jumped on the latter and started to hit him with a plastic squeak-squeak toy hammer however viciously one could with a handful of brightly coloured plastic.

"Hey! I want a piece too!"

Still pinned to the ground, Kurama clenched his fists tightly. Already his recovering pride had been treaded on once again only to be swept underneath the floor mat. His face was beggining to grow hot, and it /wasn't/ becuase of the embarrassing position. Silently looking but not listening to the exchange of childish exclamations and the occasional foul language, ki started to build up within him, as if keeping in tempo with the anger growing within himself.

Oohhh. How he wished he had either Yuusuke's reigun to blast them sky high or Hiei's black dragon to burn them to ashes...even that damn crow's bombs wouldn't be such a bad idea.

.:Forget it! Since they're gonna die, might as well feed them to my plants:.

The fox was not the only one getting pissed off. Another redhead in the room was also steaming hot, who, at that particular time was trying to rid himself of an extremely bad migraine by rubbing his temples. And the noise wasn't helping either. Aya let his hands drop to his side.

In one smooth motion, he unsheathed his katana and slashed across his two comrades' heads, purposely missing their skulls so that the blade cut off only the top bits of their hair.

The whole street had suddenly gone very quiet.

Looking down at the fine strands, both imagined what might be lying in place of their hair if the redhead had decided NOT to miss. Both parties swallowed nervously. How could they ever forgotten?! Rule no.1 in the book of being in an assassin group : Never EVER aggravate the
redhead in any way possible. Failure to acknowledge this rule /will/ result in dislocated and/or severed limbs and at times-depending on how great the situation is-a rather painful death.

If only they knew what would happen if Kurama had carried out his wrath before their friend.

Their self-assigned leader sheathed his katana and then streched out an open hand towards Yohji.

"Give it back."

"Aw! Come on, Aya! I know it's yours. Just a ¥1 000 000 note? Please?"

That latest comment had hit /way/ too near home. What was left of Kurama's pride/dignity as well as sanity had just been flushed down to sewage system to be chewed on by rats. As if sensing the green eyed one's intentions, Aya quickly dealt Yohji a left blow in the stomach,
causing the taller boy to double over in more shock than pain. As he collapsed onto the floor, his hands released their hold on Kurama's wallet.

"Serves you damn right."

Ignoring Yohji's wheezing and the younger one's loud gasps, he calmly picked up the booty and threw it to Kurama. Not missing a beat, the youth clad in white caught the wallet in mid-air and silently shoved it back into his jeans pocket. Once that was settled, Kurama gave the two
previously bickering youths a particularly hard glare, which was enough to cause both of them to back off a few steps. He then shifted his view to Aya, his emerald eyes boring through the other's violet gaze. The air had all of a sudden gone still, with no one daring to even breathe. The
tension in the room kept on mounting, instilled by the ki emanating from Kurama as well as the uncracking coldness of Aya's mask.

Suddenly, another boy burst into the room, his forehead sporting a pair of riding goggles as well as a sweater wrapped loosely around his waist. Seemingly unaware of the current atmosphere, Ken Hidaka broke the silence.

"Hey,guys... Time to get yourselves moving."

"What for?"

"Schwartz ... Back on the road."

As if nothing had happened, time started to move again. The new boy had already rushed downstairs along with Aya, leaving the other two--Omi and Yohji is it?-- scampering for the door, blaming one another for angering Aya, thus abandoning the slightly bewildered Kurama in the
room.

* Click! *

.:Shoot! They locked the door! What am I? A prisoner?!! I want to go home!!!:.


To be continued...

Ed's notes: Soo..you actually made it here! I'm a happy person! ^_^ Sorry for making Kurama sustain all that damage! Don't worry fans, he'll get his revenge soon! Well, that's all for now, watch out for chap 2; "I'm NOT a chick!" Send your feedback to us at sole_ang3l@hotmail.com . Ja ne!
!

 

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