Disclaimer: Sailormoon and all characters are copyright their
respective owners. I don't own any of the characters related
with Sailormoon, and I'm not making any money off of this story.
Note: Later on in the story, a swear word or two may appear
(nothing
very strong) but due to content, this story should probably be
rated
Pg-13. Also, the title is subject to change :p
Fears Revisited
Chapter 2
Ryanna (sailorstar100@yahoo.com)
Makoto opened her eyes slowly while the night's events
replayed in her mind. She sat up and rubbed her face. Wearily
she peered at the clock. 2:00 am. She groaned and kicked her
feet off the side of the bed, stood, and stretched.
Sleepily she wandered through the hallway until she came to
the living room. Shinosaki was asleep on the couch, one arm
across his chest and the other hanging off the side. Makoto
smiled and looked up at the room. Decorations were everywhere;
even the stockings were up and filled. The tree was decorated
and there were freshly baked cookies on the coffee table.
Her smile faded slowly and tears sprung to her eyes.
Shinosaki opened one eye at a time and sat up. He looked at
Makoto and furrowed his eyebrows. "Mako-chan, are you okay?" He
stood and walked toward her, putting a hand on her shoulder. She
didn't turn; just stood staring forward.
"Do the cookies really taste that bad?" he grinned a little
and waited for her to say something. The smile faded quickly
when her face remained frozen. "Don't you like it? Did I do
something wrong?"
Silent tears rolled down her cheeks as she turned to face
him. "Why did you do this?" she whispered.
"Because I thought you'd like it," he began slowly, his
eyes never leaving hers, "I just figured that you'd been too
busy to decorate-"
Makoto cut him off, "No! I just didn't feel like it this
year. I wasn't even going to celebrate it this year!" She
balled her hands into fists at her sides. "What right do you
have showing up at my doorstep on Christmas Eve and then telling
me what's wrong with my life?!" she yelled, her voice rising with
each word.
Shinosaki was silent. He stood still for a moment,
searching her eyes. Then he nodded and grabbed his jacked and
shrugged it on. He began to leave. As a final though he stopped
and turned around, sighing. "You know what? You're not the Kino
Makoto that I came to see. You're not my best friend," he paused
a moment, his words cutting through Makoto, "nor are you the
person I've been in love with since before I was old enough to
realize it. All I see is someone empty-Someone who cares about
nothing and no one." He looked at the floor for a moment, then
back up at her. "If you see the real Mako-chan, the person I
flew half-way around the world to see," he opened the door, "tell
her I'm at the Motel 6." The door slammed.
Makoto stared blankly at the door for a moment, then
collapsed to her knees, crying freely. Sobs wracked her body;
her shoulder jerked wildly.
Shinosaki leaned back against the door and shut his eyes. He
winced as her sobs made their way through the door and to his
ears. He looked up at the ceiling. "Nor is that the person that
I came to marry," he muttered as he started down the hallway.
Makoto hesitated for a moment at the door the Shinosaki's
motel room. Rain poured down from the heavens, mingling with the
tears on her cheeks. She wiped her face with her sleeve and
knocked on the door.
The door opened, revealing Shinosaki shirtless, and wearing a
pair of sweatpants. He stood silent, one arm on the frame of the
door.
Makoto looked down at the ground, and then back up at him.
"Never mind." She turned to leave.
"Wait." Shinosaki grabbed her arm. "What is it?"
Makoto faced him, losing herself in his dark blue eyes for a
moment. "Uh," she looked down at her hands, "I just wanted to
apologize and tell you that-" she stopped and looked him in the
eyes again. Tears ran freely down her cheeks; her long brown
hair was wet and heavy, plastered to her face. She took a deep
breath and tried again. "The reason that I shut you out like
that is because..." her voice trailed off into the rain. She
studied her hands again.
"Is because I'm-I'm afraid."
"Of what, Mako-chan? What have I done?"
"I'm afraid," she continued quietly, bringing her gaze to
meet his, "of being alone. I don't want to be alone anymore."
Shinosaki began to speak, but Makoto cut him off. "And I'm
afraid that I'm..." she lowered her gaze again, pausing for a
moment, "falling in love with you again; I don't want to lose
you." She didn't look up, and began to turn away.
She felt Shinosaki hug her tightly; for a brief moment she
wanted to push him away, then relaxed and cried into his chest.
He led her into the tiny two-bed motel room and wrapped her with
a towel.
"Shinosaki," a blonde girl stood in the corner of the room,
tapping her foot on the floor impatiently. "Who's she?" she
asked in English.
Makoto said nothing, just looked at her wearily. In the back of
her mind she regretted telling him all those things, sure that
this was a girlfriend that he'd brought with him for her to meet.
"Her name is Makoto Kino," Shinosaki answered back,
motioning to the girl standing next to him.
Makoto hugged the towel tightly around her shoulders. "Who
are you?" she asked quietly.
The girl blinked in amazement. "You speak English?"
Makoto nodded. "Well," the girl continued, "my name's Julia
Monroe," she glanced at Shinosaki quickly, and he shook his head.
Julia took his hint and continued, tilting her head to one side,
her blonde ponytail following along. "Are you a friend of
Shinosaki's?" she asked smiling.
Makoto nodded. "Sort of," she answered, unsure of what to
say. She turned to Shinosaki and handed the towel to him.
"Listen, I'd better be going. I didn't know that you had
company." She moved towards the door.
"Mako-chan!" Shinosaki grabbed her arm to keep her from leaving.
"It's pouring out. You'll get sick."
Makoto twisted her arm out of his grasp. "I'm such an
idiot, you know that?" she sighed, tears forming at the corners
of her eyes. "Goodbye, Shinosaki-kun." She walked out of the
door and into the street.
Shinosaki ran after her into the cold rain. "Mako-chan,
wait!" The girl kept walking. Shinosaki caught up with her and
grabbed her arm, whirling her around.
"What, Shinosaki? What the hell do you want with me?" she
yelled. "No, wait, let me guess the reason you flew half-way
around the world to see me. Was it so that you could throw your
blonde beauty queen girlfriend in my face?" Her eyes were red
and swollen; the tears on her face were indistinguishable from
the rain. "Well? Is that it?" she asked again. She stood there
for a moment, silent, then continued on her way. Shinosaki
caught up with her and spun her around. "Why won't you leave me
alone?" she screamed. "Haven't you don't enough already?" She
shook her head. "I should've known that bullshit about you being
in love wit me wasn't true." Shinosaki tried to defend himself,
but Makoto didn't want to hear it. "Whatever it is, I don't
care."
"Mako-chan, please-"
She rolled her eyes. "What?" she snapped.
"Marry me!" he yelled back.
Makoto's eyes widened slightly. "What did you say?" she
whispered.
"Marry me," he repeated, softer this time, putting his
hands on her shoulders. "Please, believe me when I say that I
love you." Makoto was silent, eyes wide. "And Julia's not my
girlfriend. She's the-" he shook his head clear, "She's just a
friend that I wanted you to meet..." his voice trailed off as the
lie was complete. He shook his head again. "But all that's not
important. I love you, that's what's important." He searched
her eyes. "Will you?" he whispered.
"Shinosaki, I-I don't know. I mean-" she dropped her head.
"Nothing's gone right these last few days," she mumbled.
"I know," he brushed her cheek with the back of his hand.
"And that's mostly my fault." He lifted her chin so that his
gaze met hers. "But all that aside. Will you marry me?"
Again she was silent; she couldn't tear her eyes from the
sea of blue. Her heart told her one thing, her mind another.
She opened her mouth to answer, then hesitated a moment.
Shinosaki's eyes bore into hers, hopeful and loving. Time stood
still. The rain disappeared. Only they existed in the world.
Makoto shut her eyes for a moment, and then opened them again. A
smile crept across her face. "Okay. But I'm still not sure how
this is going to work."
Shinosaki grinned and threw his arms around her, picking her up
and spun her around once, then put her back down and kissed her
deeply. Makoto melted into his embrace and knew this was right.
To be continued...
Sorry this chapter was so short! this was supposed to be
a short story, and I'm still not sure where to break it for
chapters since it's not finished. So, sorry everyone! Comments,
questions, cherry pies? Send them to sailorstar100@yahoo.com
The.library (new version!! I need stories!!)
http://www.geocities.com/moonlightdetensu
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geocities.com/tokyo/shrine/4094/ryanna) (
geocities.com/tokyo/shrine/4094) (
geocities.com/tokyo/shrine) (
geocities.com/tokyo)