I let my head fall back against the leather headrest of the chair, closing my eyes and drawing a deep breath. The guitar feels natural in my hands, normal, peaceful, it helps me centre, to concentrate. I play a few chords, stringing them together too see what happens. It sounds ok, not brilliant. I alter one of them and listen.
In the quiet of the otherwise deserted boardroom, it sounds wonderful. The way the notes come together to make something interesting, something beautiful. I can’t help but smile to myself as I alter my playing, speed up a little. I like to play slowly but Shuichi doesn’t like to sing slowly. I like to play soft songs but they don’t suit Shuichi’s voice. He’s too full of energy to ever sing a soft song and I’ll be damned if I’d ask him to calm down.
I don’t think he could if I asked him. He’s like a whirlwind, running haphazardly through the lives of people around him, throwing them into chaos and leaving destruction in his wake. He does it to everyone. People seem to think I’m immune to it since I can just sit here and deal with him but the truth is I’m not. I’ve been weathering Shuichi’s storms for much longer then the others thought and I’ve learnt the best defence against them, and once I learned to stop telling him throw me of, I learned to start looking at him. Seeing him in a way nobody else does. Te boy, terrified of failure, desperate for approval, willing to do anything to be loved.
I notice my playing has taken on a sad edge and change it quickly. I show my moods through my music more then anything. Not what I play with bad luck, that’s Shuichi’s music, but what I play on my own.
They’ll be here any time now, everyone else, ready to be thrown into another round of disarray at one of Shuichi’s seemingly unpredictable moods.
I give a sad smile then turn my attention back to the music.
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