Stuff To Do On An Elevator

1. Blow your nose and offer to show the contents of your kleenex to other passengers.

2. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut up, dammit, all of you just shut UP!"

3. Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside ask: "Got enough air in there?"

4. Offer name tags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear yours upside-down.

5. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open,then act embarrassed when they open by themselves.

6. Lean over to another passenger and whisper: "Noogie patrol coming!"

7. Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake and ask them to call you Admiral.

8. On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it stay open until you hear the penny you dropped down the shaft go "plink" at the bottom.

9. Stare, grinning, at another passenger for a while, and then announce: "I've got new socks on!"

10. Meow occassionally.

11. Bet the other passengers you can fit a quarter in your nose.

12. Frown and mutter "gotta go, gotta go" then sigh and say "oops!"

13. Show other passengers a wound and ask if it looks infected.

14. Walk on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.

15. Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce "You're one of THEM!" and move to the far corner of the elevator.

16. Burp, and then say "mmmm...tasty!"

17. Ask each passenger getting on if you can push the button for them.

18. Wear a puppet on your hand and talk to other passengers "through" it.

19. Start a sing-along.

20. When the elevator is silent, look around and ask "is that your beeper?"

21. Play the harmonica.

22. Shadow box.

23. Lean against the button panel.

24. Say "I wonder what all these do" and push the red buttons.

25. Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope.

26. Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers that this is your "personal space."

27. Blow spit bubbles.

28. Pull your gum out of your mouth in long strings.

29 Announce in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host body."

30. Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.

Links to other sites on the Web

Menace's Page (where i got this)

© 1997

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