Lightning Tumbles Down, Part 8
Lightning Tumbles Down

Joey made a face as she tried to lift the huge canvas bundle onto her back. Maybe stopping at the library wasn't such a good idea, she told herself. When the teacher had told the class to do a follow-up paper, she hadn't thought anything of it. Now, with 3 child psychology books, volumes 5 and 12 of the Encyclopedia Brittanica, and an informational video filling up her bag, Joey had come to the conclusion that Ms. Krantz was out of her mind.

She groaned and heaved the load onto her back, leaning back with its weight. She grabbed the railing and began to carefully make her way down the steps.

As she reached the bottom step, she felt a drop of cold wetness on her cheek, and she looked up. The clouds were congested, filling the sky as far as the eye could see. Another drop hit Joey on the shoulder and she stamped her foot as best she could without being pulled over. Someone up there hates me. She began walking briskly in the direction of Dawson's house. The drops sliding down her face were telling her that the row home was going to be great fun. She groaned inwardly as the rain came down harder on her bare arms. The weight on her back was killing her, making her want to stop and rest. But everything was closing up for the night, and if Joey stopped, she felt she may never get moving again. So, she continued down the street.

Several cars passed by, spraying a fan of water droplets onto the sidewalk. She felt the water splursh between her toes as they sank into puddles, and she grimaced.

At the corner, she could take it no longer and sank to the curb. Joey was nearly swimming in her jeans as the water ran over the concrete and into the gutter. She shrugged off the backpack and leaned back on her elbows, feet dangling in a miniature river running towards the grate. She wriggled her toes inside her shoes and socks and turned her face up to the sky, letting the rain run over her cheeks, lips and eyelids. She smiled, rubbing the cold off her arms.

A car horn startled her out of her reverie and she narrowed her eyes as she recognized the vehicle. The champagne colored Mazda Millenia pulled up to the curb, spraying dirty water and Joey stood up, hands on her hips, anger showing in her eyes.

"Pacey! What the hell did you do that for?" He rolled down the passenger side window and leaned out.

"Jo, you look like a cat that fell into the toilet." She looked at him and then picked up her bag, walking away. He pulled the car ahead, shouting at her. "Jo, get in the car. I'll drive you home." She didn't even turn her head in his direction, but instead, kept walking. "Jo, I'm not kidding. You're going to catch pneumonia." She was shaking her head as she crossed the street and slung the bag over her shoulder, leaning under the weight. Thoroughly annoyed, he put the car into park and ran through the lights to grab her arm.

"If you aren't going to get in the car at least let me drive your bag home." She turned and stared at him, brown eyes never wavering.

"I can handle it." He raised an eyebrow and looked at her.

"And that's why you're almost bent over double? I don't think so." He reached out and began taking the straps off her shoulders. Joey pushed him away and started to cross the street. Pacey grabbed her hand and she threw it down, sighing loudly. Finally, he reached out and grabbed the strap of the bag and jerked it back, causing her to fall into him.

Stumbling backward, Joey made contact with his chest and struggled to get her feet back under her. She avoided his eyes as she stood up, backpack in his hands. And then she turned to him, holding out her hand.

"Give it back." Wordlessly, he turned away, tossing the bag in the back seat of the car and slamming the door. "Dammit Pacey! Will you please just give me my bag!"

"No." Exasperated, she walked up and pulled him away from the door. Her fingers twitched as they slid over the fabric of his sleeve. He was facing her, but she hadn't let go of his arm.

"Get in the car, Joey." She bit her lip, shaking her head. He watched the rain slide over her wet, limp hair and frowned.

"I don't think that's such a good idea." He pulled his arm out of her grasp and opened the door, motioning for her to get in. Once again, she shook her head.

"Pace, I really don't think I should."

"For God's sake. I'm not asking you to have my kid. Just get in the car!" She raised her eyes, dark meeting light, grave brown meeting cold blue. Finally she tore her gaze away and put a hand on the door.

"Take me right home then." She got in and shut the door and he walked around to his side, cursing quietly. As they drove through town, she spoke, breaking the intense silence.

"Who's car did you steal this time? The McPhee's?" He smirked, braking at a light.

"Hardly. My father, for some reason, bought my mother, who never goes anywhere, this fine piece of machinery." He laughed bitterly. "Nice of him, wasn't it?" She nodded silently, trying to forget the cold tone of his voice.

He glanced at her, noted her teeth tugging at her lip. He loved watching her do that. It nearly drove him crazy. He forced his eyes back to the road and coughed.

"Have you heard from Dawson? How's his trip?" She licked her lips, and swallowed.

"He's doing good. Apparantly having a lot of fun." He nodded slowly, barely moving his head. She looked away, watching the rain hit the window and slide down, making trails across the glass.

"What've they got him doing?" Joey turned back to him, fingers absentmindedly tucking hair behind her ear.

"No offense, but can we not talk about Dawson?"

"He comes back in two days. We need to talk about him sometime." She turned back to the window.

"Do we?" He glanced at her, brow furrowed.

"Yeah, we do. And you know it, so quit trying to avoid it."

"I really don't want to be having this conversation."

"Too bad, Joey. I really don't care if you don't want to. Certain things have to be said. Have to be talked about." He sighed and leaned back in the seat.

"This is why I didn't want a ride..." she whispered, putting her feet on the dash.

"Would you rather that Dawson came back and incessently commented on how awkward we were around each other? Because, let me assure you, that's what's going to happen." He glanced at her. The dark eyes were beginning to water, her lips beginning to tremble.

Pacey pulled the car into the Potter yard. He closed his eyes, listening to the rain beat on the roof, and sighed. He also noticed that Joey hadn't left the car. When his eyes opened, he saw her with her head on her knees, eyes open and looking at him.

Speak to me,
don't mislead me,
the calm I feel means a storm is swelling

"I'm sorry." He turned toward her.

"For what?"

"For being a bitch back there." He smiled slightly, briefly, and she raised her head. "And," she paused, frowning. "I'm sorry for making all this tension between us." He put his hand on her shoulder, rubbing with his thumb.

"It's not your fault. At least not entirely." Her eyes were closing, her lips parting and her body relaxing as he rubbed her shoulder. He closed his eyes momentarily and took a deep breath. "Listen, I know you love Dawson." She nodded.

"I do."

"And I know that you miss him." He sighed and turned away, eyes sightlessly staring out the window. He continued.

It's my heart that pounds beneath my flesh
it's my mouth that pushes out this breath

"I don't want to hurt him for anything in the world. He's my best friend." He took a deep breath and swallowed. He released the air, nearly choking on it. "But, I can't deny what I'm feeling right now. What I feel whenever I'm around you." He glanced at Joey. The look in her eyes gave him goosebumps and he shivered under his sweater. "And, I can't lie and tell you that I don't want to kiss you again, or won't kiss you again." She was turned toward him now, a leg folded under her, an arm around the headrest. He looked at his hands on the steering wheel and tried to smile. "I remember envying Dawson. That's no surprise I guess. But I never actually wanted anything he had." He looked up at her, eyes burning into hers like a laser. "Until now, anyway." The smile had dropped from his face and he shook his head quickly, exhaling loudly. "Maybe you'd better go inside now."

He reached for a can that had fallen under his feet and Joey reached toward him, grasping his hand. Except it didn't happen like that. She leaned down toward his hand and her shoulder hit the tape deck, slamming the tape in. Ignoring it, she took his hand, squeezing it gently. He turned toward her and straightened up. As his fingers slipped between hers, the tape began to play.

Joey pulled her hand back as Pacey leaned towards her, his hand moving to the back of her neck, his thumb tilting her chin up. He brushed his lips across hers, light as the touch of a moth's wing. She ran her own over his cheek and whispered in his ear.

"Come inside with me. It's cold out here."

Pacey stood inside the doorway of the Potter household, ringing out the cuff of his sweatshirt, as he slipped out of his shoes. He and Joey had run in a minute earlier and she had pushed past him to dump the bag on the table. He walked in and leaned against the kitchen counter as he heard Joey running up the stairs. Snagging a cookie, he relaxed into a chair, and leaned his elbows on the tabletop. Hearing muffled conversation on the floor above him, he glanced at the folded paper and reached for it. After a moment's hesitation, he got up and pulled a glass out of the cupboard. He filled the glass with milk and found another cookie.

"Don't get too comfortable, Pacey." His head snapped up and he dropped the paper to the table as Bessie looked sternly down on him. She and Joey stood against the wall with their arms crossed looking remarkably like sisters for the first time he'd known them. He hastily got to his feet, feeling his face burn and flush.

"Sorry Bes. I was hungry." He grinned at her and she laughed.

"And in need of reading material? It's ok. I was just kidding anyway." She walked to the door and pulled her coat off the rack. Then she turned to Joey.

"Please make sure the house doesn't burn down while I'm gone." She took Joey's look of annoyance as one of enthrallment and looked at Pacey. "Nice to see you again, Pace." He gave Bessie a salute and closed the door behind her. Then he looked at Joey.

"What do we do now?" She shrugged.

"I guess we can work on our papers." She reached for the bag and he stepped forward, putting a hand on her arm. She looked up at him as he spoke.

"Let me take it."

"Ya know, I think I want to write a song about this. Except one of the strings on my guitar is broken. Hey Chandler, can I borrow your G - string?"

Joey giggled as they watched the last few seconds of Friends.

"You know, what I really don't understand is why any man in their right mind would allow some woman to con him into wearing her underwear. Frankly, I think it shows a lack of will-power and a lingering bit of an Oedipus complex." Pacey curled his toes around the edge of the table. Joey crossed her ankles and took a drink of her Coke.

"I guess it's a good thing you don't write for the show then, because if you did, I think they would have experienced a severe drop in ratings." He raised an eyebrow and looked at her, crossing his ankles as well.

"I'm trying to decide if I'm going to take offense at that." She rolled her eyes, forcing them away from his face, and instead concentrating on the red seam at the toe of his sock. "But really, one of my favorite lines would be from Rachel, when she finds out Ross slept with that Xerox chick." He closed his eyes, seemingly deep in thought. Joey drank from her glass. "It was something like, 'A mistake?! What were you trying to put it in,her purse?'" He laughed suddenly, bringing a smile to her face. "I mean, where else would he put it? In her coffee?" Joey choked on the liquid she was swallowing. She coughed and sputtered as Pacey took the glass from her hand and began patting her on the back. She closed her watering eyes and sucked in a breath, finally feeling the cold rush of air move down her windpipe.

"You know, sometimes it helps if you breathe. Not just once in a while, but frequently. Maybe mark it on your calendar." She shot him a dirty look as he began laughing. She pushed his hand away from her shoulder and crossed her arms in front of her.

"You just wait until one day when you almost choke to death on something. I'll be the one watching and laughing my ass off."

"Aw, Jo...you wound me." He put a hand on her back and she moved away. "But really, you'd be laughing to if you saw your face turn that unimaginable shade of blue." She bit her lip trying to keep the smile off her face, but when he started again, she erupted in peals of laughter.

As she brushed the tears from her eyes, she tucked her feet under her and faced Pacey, leaning her head on her hand, her arm draped over the back of the couch. He was leaned back against the armrest, eyes closed, mouth laughing. She laughed once more as he opened his eyes, and then as the grin on his face faded to a thoughtful expression, her joy was replaced by anxiousness.

Can't you see what you're doin' to me
You fill my heart with misery
With every breath, every step I take
I'm more in love with you....

He put his elbow on the back of the couch and slid a foot to the floor, leaning forward slightly. Joey closed her eyes, turning her face as Pacey's hand came up and touched her cheek. Soundlessly, he slid across the cushion, fingers moving slowly through the soft hair at the nape of her neck, thumb rubbing gently at the curve of her jaw, his other hand falling to rest on her knee. Joey's eyes flew open, focusing on the reflection in the window and she clamped her teeth down hard on her lip.

"Pacey, I think that maybe, we should finish up our papers..." she whispered hoarsely. He shook his head, eyes partially closed, sweeping over the shadow of her eyelashes, the rich curve of her lips.

Joey put a hand over his, trying to pull away, but instead, found herself lacing her fingers through his, turning her face to kiss the palm of his hand.

"God, Joey," Pacey breathed. She felt his breath on her face, and she turned and rubbed her cheek against his hand. The fingers on her knee stroked, quickening her breath. Once again, her eyes closed as he tilted her face up, kissed her chin. His hands were shaking as one slid up the cotton of her pants to her lower thigh, and the other brushed the wisps of hair from her eyes.

He bent his head close to hers, eyelashes brushing against her cheek. And he kissed her lips like red sparks of heat igniting a match. She gasped and pulled away, scooting back over the arm rest. Her feet hit the floor and there was a crash of thunder and Joey started, trembling as the lights flickered once.

A cry came from upstairs and she spoke, voice wavering. "That's Alex...I-I should go get him..." Pacey was staring at her, his eyes never moving, never twitching. They spoke to her and she bit her lip hard.

This isn't over.

Joey looked back, blinking once and shaking her head almost imperceptibly. No, she thought. This is the way it has to be.

She turned away and raced upstairs to check on Alex.

Continued...

Credit goes to DMB, Garbage, Natalie Merchant, and the people that own the show Friends