From drewry@roanoke.infi.net Sun Mar 14 13:35:15 1999
TITLE: Blue's Deep Space Nine Adventure
AUTHOR: Laura Taylor (drewry@roanoke.infi.net)
SECTION: 1/?
RATING: PG
SERIES/CODES: DS9, Blue's Clues
SUMMARY: Quark's private stash of latinum is missing. Can super-sleuth
Steve Burns and his trusty puppy, Blue, find them?
DISCLAIMER: Paramount owns the Star Trek universe and everything it
encompasses; "Blue's Clues" is a product of Nickelodeon, a subsidiary
of Viacom International. This story is a product of fan fiction and is
not intended to infringe on any copyrights.
This may be added to the ASC and Marlissa's parody archives; anyone
else, please ask first!
I threw down the gauntlet. Some of you picked it up and slapped me in
the face with it. This one's for you :-D
Enjoy!
Laura
=====
Quark was frantic, his oversized ears bulging as his panic-driven blood
raced through the veins lying just beneath the surface. "Odo, I'm
telling you, there's a thief on board the station!" he cried, thumping
his fist on the desk for emphasis.
Odo barely glanced up from the Raymond Chandler novel he was reading to
notice. "The only thief around here I know of is you, Quark," he
growled. "How do I know you didn't break into your own safe?"
"Why would I steal my own latinum?" Quark protested.
His rubbery face simulating an arched Vulcan eyebrow, Odo put his PADD
down and stared hard at Quark. "To collect on the insurance, no doubt.
It's just the sort of double-dealing I've come to expect from you."
Quark had to conceded that it was a clever idea, to steal his own money
and then claim reimbursement from the insurers. Unfortunately, it
wasn't his idea. "But I didn't do it! You can check the sensor logs if
you don't believe me!"
"I wouldn't believe you if you told me you were a Ferengi," Odo scoffed.
"Your brother's an engineer, he could've altered the logs."
"Rom wouldn't do that!"
"He would for the right price."
Quark pressed his palms against the desk and leaned in toward Odo.
"Then ask Chief O'Brien if anyone has accessed the sensor databanks in
the past 26 hours. I guarantee you he'll find nothing that leads him
back to Rom." He leaned back and studied Odo. "Now that I think about
it, the only person on this station who could sneak past the sensors and
access the safe is...."
"Don't even think it," Odo snapped.
"Admit it, Odo, you've always held a grudge against me. Setting me up
like this is just the sort of double-dealing I've come to expect from
*you*." Quark grinned triumphantly. Although he didn't suspect Odo
would break into his safe--what would a changeling need with
latinum?--it felt so good to turn the constable's accusation on its
head. Outsmarting Odo almost made the loss of 250 bars of gold pressed
latinum tolerable. "And ever since you and the colonel became an item,
your mind just hasn't been on your job."
That might not have been the best thing to say, Quark realized, as Odo
seemed to grow to twice his size. "Are you accusing me of being
*unfair*?" Odo demanded, his flexible body stretching across his desk
until his hands grasped Quark's coat by the lapels. "Are you daring to
suggest that I'm unable to do my job?"
"Now, now, let's not get violent," Quark backpedaled, trying in vain to
free himself, "I simply meant that --"
Odo yanked him closer, until the edge of the desk dug painfully into
Quark's stomach. "*What*?"
"The colonel, lovely as she is, has you distracted," Quark squeaked.
Odo released Quark with a shove and straightened his uniform as Quark
rubbed at his bruised waistline. "All right, very well, have it your
way, Quark," he said, typing something into his desk console.
"Have what my way?"
"You want an impartial investigator, I'll give you one."
Quark's jaw dropped. "You'll do what?" What was Odo up to?
"As luck would have it, one of the Alpha Quadrant's best detectives is a
guest on the station. I invited him here, myself, to discuss
investigation techniques. If I ask him, he'll help you relocate your
missing latinum and find the perpetrator."
"Really?" Quark wasn't sure of he should trust Odo or not. What if
this was another one of his ploys? "Who is he?"
"His name is Steve Burns," Odo said, raising his chin. "But why don't I
let him introduce himself to you," he added as the doors to his office
slid open.
Still disbelieving, Quark turned to see the interloper, a young human
male, age indeterminate, dressed in a two-tone green striped polo shirt,
tan pants and sturdy brown shoes. Something about him looked too *good*
to be true--his clean, well-scrubbed face and wide brown eyes possessed
an innocence that, in Quark's estimation, had to be a disguise for
something far more sinister. No one could look that guileless unless
they had something to hide.
That was nothing, however, compared to the strange little blue-spotted
creature accompanying him. Quark had never seen anything of its kind,
and in fifteen years on this station he had seen just about everything
there was to be seen. The creature had long, floppy ears, short, stubby
legs, a pink tongue that dribbled blue droplets on Quark's shoes as it
sniffed his feet, and it made strange noises as it bounded around the office.
"What *is* that?" he demanded, making no effort to hide his disgust.
"Rruff-rrowr," the creature responded, jumping on to one of the chairs
and wagging its tail furiously, its tongue leaving a puddle of blue on
the carpet below.
"Oh, that's my puppy, Blue," the young man said, his impossibly earnest
expression seeming even more so. "Hi, I'm Steve," he added by way of
introduction. "Odo asked us here to help you hunt for some more of
Blue's clues."
"Whose clues?" Quark asked, almost afraid to hear the answer.
"Blue's clues," Steve repeated. "I understand you're trying to find
something, and we're here to help."
Quark glanced back and forth between Odo, who was once again engrossed
in his mystery novel, and Steve, who looked like he spent entirely too
much time around small children. "You're going to help me find my
missing latinum by looking for --"
"That's right, Blue's clues," Steve said, a smile spreading across his face.
From out of nowhere, music started to play, a jangly simple tune that
hurt Quark's ears but was nevertheless too catchy to ignore. Even
worse, Steve started to swivel his hips in what looked like a crude
approximation of dancing. What the hell had Odo gotten him into?
"Okay, okay," Steve said, and Quark was unable not to listen, "to play
Blue's clues, we've got to find a --"
"Pawprint," Odo filled in, not even looking up. Quark stared at him.
What was Odo not telling him? Was this some sort of nasty trick Odo was
perpetrating against him, after all the times Quark had tried to do an
end run around Odo, or was Quark now in hell?
"Right!" Steve chirped. Quark wished he'd stayed in bed. "'Cause
that's the first --"
"Clue," again Odo supplied the answer. Quark stared at him, dumbfounded
beyond belief.
Then, horror of horrors, Steve began to sing:
"Yeah! And then we put it in our notebook,
'Cause they're Blue's clues, Blue's clues.
We gotta find another pawprint
That's the second clue.
We put it in our notebook
'Cause they're whose clues?"
Quark knew this part, and despite himself, said, "Blue's clues."
Steve beamed, and continued:
"We gotta find the last pawprint,
That's the third clue.
We put it in our notebook
'Cause they're whose clues?"
Quark couldn't help himself. "Blue's clues."
"You know what to do," Steve sang on, and Quark wondered if he even
*wanted* to know. "Sit down in our thinking chair and think...think...thi-i-ink.
'Cause when we use our minds,
And take a step at a time,
We can do anything
That we wanna do."
The music faded away and, mercy of mercies, Steve stopped dancing.
"Okay," he instructed Quark, speaking to him very carefully, as if Quark
were a small child, "I need you to help me look for three
pawprints--Blue's clues. When we find these clues, we'll write them
down in our handy-dandy notebook." Steve took said notebook out of his
pocket and showed it to Quark, who nodded mutely. "After we find all
three clues, then we'll sit down in our thinking chair and try to find
the answer to the clues!" He smiled down at the blue creature, who
seemed to be engrossed in chasing a golden yo-yo Odo had fashioned out
of his hand. "Isn't that right, Blue?"
"Rruff-rrowr!" Blue barked.
"Okay then, let's go!" Steve charged, beckoning Quark and Blue to
follow him with a broad sweep of his arm. Blue followed after him with
a bound and another bark.
Quark stopped just inside the sliding doors and glared at Odo. In the
distance, he could hear Steve singing, "We are looking for Blue's clues,
we are looking for Blue's clues, we are looking for Blue's clues, and
now we'll have some fun."
"This had better be on the up-and-up, Odo," Quark snarled. "I'm in no
mood for any of your tricks."
Odo just smiled, and Quark reluctantly left his office to follow Steve
and that annoying blue creature of his. As the doors closed behind him,
however, Quark thought he heard Odo laugh.
==========
Despite the instinctive drag coming from his feet, Quark hurried to
catch up to Steve and Blue, who were skipping down the
Promenade--rather, Steve was skipping and Blue was bounding and barking.
There was a brief moment of confusion when Quark felt a mixture of
relief and concern as they disappeared around a corner, but horror
eliminated them both when he realized Steve and Blue had entered Garak's
tailor shop.
"Nagus spare the Divine Treasury," he muttered to himself, "what have I
let Odo talk me in to?"
Quark almost had to lift each foot manually in order to follow Steve and
Blue into Garak's, but eventually he made it there. Garak was standing
next to a well-dressed mannequin, pins sticking out of his
tightly-clamped lips at odd angles, a bemused expression on his face as
he watched his visitors. He nodded at Quark as he came in. For their
part, Steve and Blue seemed to be playing a game of sorts among the
clothing racks. Quark groaned and rubbed the back of his neck. This
was not going well at all.
"So, who are our guests?" Garak said, and Quark looked up to see he had
removed the pins from his mouth.
"I dunno, some detective friend of Odo's" Quark said mournfully. He
despaired of ever finding his latinum at this rate. "They're supposed
to be helping me find my missing latinum."
Garak clucked his tongue. "So sorry to hear about the break-in," he
said, although Quark doubted he felt sorry at all. "What about
that...blue thing?" Garak asked. "Is it some sort of bloodhound?"
Before Quark could answer, however, he heard a cry of excitement from
Steve. "A clue, a clue!" he shouted, popping up from behind the
lingerie display to wave Quark over.
Disbelieving, Quark said, "You see a clue? Where?"
"Over here!" Steve called. Quark, with Garak right on his heels, went
over to see what Steve had found. On the floor, half-hidden beneath a
long, shimmery negligée, was a bar of gold pressed latinum with a
distinctive blue pawprint on it. "This is our first clue," Steve
announced proudly.
Quark bent down to retrieve the bar. He turned it over, looking for the
identification code he etched into each bar of latinum that entered his
safe. Sure enough, the bar was one of his. He turned and stared at
Garak in shock.
"You!" he accused. "Where did you put the rest of it?" He waved the
bar in Garak's face. "Where are the other 249 bars, Garak?" he demanded.
Holding his hands before him in a placating gesture, Garak said, "Now
wait a minute, Quark, *I* didn't steal your latinum, I don't know how
that got here!"
"Ha!" Quark cried, advancing on Garak with the bar raised as if he
intended to strike the tailor with it. "That's just the sort of thing
I’d expect to hear from an ex-spy!"
"Now, now, Quark," Garak insisted, "if I were going to steal your
private treasury--which, I assure you, would *never* occur to me--do you
honestly think I’d be so careless as to leave one bar lying in plain
view in my own shop?"
"He's right, you know," Steve said.
Quark glared at him. "He would if he thought it might put us on the
wrong track. And Garak is one of the few people on this station with
the resources to pull off a heist of this nature."
"Oh, I don't know, didn't you say the same thing about Odo?"
"How do you know?" Quark asked. "You weren't there." He shrugged and
pocketed the bar. "All right, so I don't know for sure that Garak stole
my latinum. Who did, then?"
Steve smiled indulgently at Quark. "We'll have to look for more of
Blue's clues, I guess."
"Whose clues?" Garak asked.
Quark groaned. "Blue's clues," he muttered. Garak just rolled his
eyes. Quark looked at Steve. "Okay, what's next?"
Steve beamed and reached into his pocket. "Notebook!" he announced.
"Yeah, right, I forgot," Quark muttered.
"That's right, we put it in our handy-dandy notebook," Steve said. He
opened the notebook to a blank page, took a fat green crayon from his
other pocket, and began to draw a picture of the bar. "First we draw a
long line here," he said, describing the picture as he drew it, "then a
short line here, and here, and another long line like so, and...ta-da!"
Then, beneath the crude drawing, he wrote in block lettering, 'GOLD
PRESSED LATINUM.'
Quark and Garak stood next to Steve to study the drawing. Then Steve
looked at each of them and asked, "What do you suppose Blue would want
with a bar of gold pressed latinum?"
Quark shrugged. "She's your puppy, you tell me."
Steve pursed his lips together, then closed the notebook and put it and
his crayon back in their respective pockets. "Well, I suppose our next
step is to find another clue."
Nodding sagely, Garak said, "Sounds reasonable to me." A commotion on
the far side of the shop distracted him. "Hey!" he cried, running
across the shop.
Suddenly Quark realized he had not seen Blue since she first found the
bar of latinum, and with the dread of realization followed Garak. Much
to his horror, the blue creature had torn an ornate dress of golden
Tholian silk from its hanger and was in the process of chewing it to
shreds.
"Stop it, you beast!" Garak cried, waving his arms and stamping his
feet to scare Blue off. "That dress was made especially for Admiral
Necheyev!"
Rather than scamper away, however, Blue seemed to take Garak's behavior
as a game and dropped her head low, her tail waving high in the air.
"Rro-rro-rro-rro-rro!" she yapped playfully, leaping forward and taking
the hem of Garak's trouser leg between her teeth.
"No, Blue!" Steve shouted, trying, and failing, to catch her.
Quark just stood there, dumbfounded, as Garak danced about on one foot,
trying in vain to shake the little creature from his other leg and
instead succeeding only in knocking several display racks to the floor.
With a yell and a frantic flailing of arms, Garak finally went down
amidst the garments. As he lay, helpless, on his back, Blue leaped on
to his chest and started licking his face.
"Get...this...monster...out...of...here," Garak swore as best he could,
struggling to sit up. Steve reached out a hand to assist him, but Garak
swatted it away. "You get out, too!"
Quark almost felt sorry for Steve and Blue when he saw the looks of
remorse on their faces. He didn't think he'd ever seen anything who
could look as genuinely guilty as those two did. "Aw, c'mon Garak, they
didn't mean any harm, Blue just got carried away."
Garak at last managed to stand and recover some of his customary
dignity, although his shop was in complete disarray. "I don't care,
Quark," he hissed, jerking a finger toward the door. "Get them out of here!"
Ashamed, Quark, Steve and Blue slunk out. Blue even had her tail
between her legs. Just as the door slammed shut behind them, however,
Quark heard Garak swear, "I'll get you...and your little dog, too!"
"Well," Quark said, trying to put a positive spin on the situation, "at
least we found a clue."
He noticed Blue perk her ears. Cocking his head to one side, he trained
his own sensitive ears in the direction where she was now facing, her
tail again wagging furiously. Then, in the distance, he heard a chorus
singing, "Mail time, mail time, ma-il ti-me...."
=======
Quark immediately recognized the tension in Steve's shoulders and that
glazed look in his eyes as the chorus grew louder. Never mind that the
chorus announced the arrival of the day's mail, which usually meant the
Starfleeters on the station would be in a good mood and thus more
willing to spend their latinum; Steve's behavior could only mean one
thing. Quark instinctively cowered, covering his ears with his hands
even though he knew it would prove useless.
Sure enough, Steve began to sing, his reedy voice growing more strident
with each line as he started flailing his arms about, nearly striking a
woman in the face as she hurried past:
"Here's the mail
It never fails
It make me want to wag my tail --"
Whereupon Steve had the audacity to wag his posterior with entirely too
much enjoyment for a normal healthy young male human,
"When it comes I want to wail --"
And at this point Steve got right up in Quark's face, waved his hands
like a Lessepian baboon during mating season, and caterwauled, "-- ma-a-il!"
Quark slumped to the floor, his ears ringing. Would the horror never
end? Were 250 bars of gold pressed latinum really worth this torment?
Well, maybe they were. But, no matter what it took, he'd repay Odo--in
full, with interest and penalties.
Through the roaring in his ears, Quark thought he heard his brother.
Small comfort, he thought, forcing his eyes open just enough to see Rom
barreling down the Promenade toward him, waving a PADD in his hand.
From Quark's perspective, it looked as though Rom was shouting,
"Cookie!" which confused Quark to no end. What would Rom want with
cookies? True, he did have a fetish for that dreadful root beer humans
liked so much, but cookies? Had he gone completely around the bend?
"Oh, look, Quark," Steve said in his normal voice, "you've got a
letter!"
Then Steve looked at Blue, who looked at Quark, who looked at Steve, who
began to sing *again*:
"You just got a letter,
You just got a letter,
You just got a letter,
I wonder who it's from?"
Then Blue jumped into Quark's arms and started slobbering all over his
face. "Ugh!" Quark cried, clambering to his feet and dumping Blue on
the floor, "what do you *feed* that thing? That's the worst-smelling
breath I've ever smelled, and I've had to stand a meter from Morn's
mouth for 10 years!"
Steve didn't have a chance to answer, as Rom had finally caught up to
them. Out of breath from making such an idiot of himself, he was barely
able to gasp, "Moogie" and hand the PADD to Quark before dropping. Blue
immediately took advantage of Rom, who, not surprisingly, didn't seem to
mind her breath at all. In fact, he seemed to be enjoying the strange
little creature's affection, which didn't surprise Quark too much. What
did he expect from someone who drank root beer?
Quark looked at the PADD. It was a letter from Moogie! The only good
thing that had happened to him all day. He sighed, brushed away a
droplet of moisture that was *not* a tear, and hugged the PADD to his
chest, pretending it was his moogie hugging him instead. Then he
activated the message display to read what she had to say. The letter
was disappointingly brief:
"Dear Quark,
Sorry to hear about the sudden loss in personal profits. Don't forget
you still owe Zekkie 50 bars of latinum from the dabo table! We'll stop
by on our way back from Risa to pick it up. Give my love to your brother.
Moogie"
Quark was crestfallen. "What does Moogie say, Brother?" Rom asked.
Quark didn't answer.
"Oh, dear," Steve said from behind him. "It looks like your mother
can't help him." Rom looked disappointed. "But she sends you her
love," Steve added. Rom brightened.
Quark jerked away from Steve. "Stop reading my mail!" he cried. "I
wasn't expecting her help anyway," he added, although he know
nobody--least of all himself--believed it.
Steve patted Quark on the shoulder. "Maybe," he said, using that
patronizing, one-word-at-a-time tone of voice Quark found so annoying,
"it would help if we looked for more Blue's clues?"
"Whose clues?" Rom asked.
"Blue's clues," Steve and Quark replied in unison, although Steve's
response was noticeably more enthusiastic.
"Oh," Rom said. Blue barked. "Ohhhhh," Rom said, as if he understood her.
"Well, Quark, shall we look for some more of Blue's clues?" Steve asked.
It was the most reasonable thing Quark could think of. After all, the
first clue had already yielded the return of one of his missing bars.
And it wasn't as if he could keep his mind on his business at present,
anyway. He nodded at Steve. "Sure, let's go look for some more of
Blue's clues. What do I have to lose?"
As Quark nodded his assent, Blue started running around in circles,
barking wildly. "Rro-rro-rro-rro-rro!" she yipped, bounding around
Steve, Quark and Rom like a little blue cyclone. Several passers-by
stopped to stare and laugh. Even Rom thought her antics were funny, and
started chasing her, until he ran into a bulkhead because he wasn't
paying attention to where he was going. Quark sighed. The day was
still young, and already his brother was clunking his head on walls.
"C'mon, Blue!" Steve called, heading down the Promenade. With one
final bark, Blue bounded after him, her tail wagging.
As he followed after them, Quark couldn't help join in the singing: "We
are looking for Blue's clues, we are looking for Blue's clues, we are
looking for Blue's clues, and now we'll have some fun!"
=====
Quark was not quite so sure of himself when they entered a turbolift and
Steve ordered, "Ops." He was a bar owner, not part of the station's
administrative staff, and even when the station wasn't kept in a
constant state of yellow alert he didn't belong in the operations
center. Profit only knew what Captain Sisko would have to say about
Steve and Blue wandering through Ops.
Steve continued to hum his annoying tune. No doubt, by the end of the
day it would be irrevocably burned into the recesses of Quark's memory,
and six years from now he would find himself lying in bed, unable to
sleep because of that damn song! What he wouldn't give for a rousing
chorus of Klingon opera just to drown Steve out.
The turbolift came to a shuddering halt at Ops. Much to Quark's relief,
it seemed to be relatively empty; the only officers he saw were Chief
O'Brien, Commander Worf and a few Bajoran junior officers. He was very
grateful Colonel Kira and Lieutenant Dax were not around to witness his
humiliation.
Blue dashed off the turbolift and immediately began a nose-to-the-ground
survey of the entire operations center, leaving no smell undetected.
Her periodic "Rro-rro-rro's" kept Quark apprised of her progress.
Steve, on the other hand, remained close to Quark, his mouth gaping as
he took in the impressive sight.
"Wow," he said. "This is really something." He turned his wide brown
eyes on Quark. "Have you ever seen anything as amazing as this?" Quark
shrugged.
At the sound of Steve's voice, O'Brien looked up from the engineering
station and nodded at them. "'ello, Quark, what brings you up 'ere?"
Quark glanced nervously at Worf, who stood there scowling at him, then
said, "I'm trying to find some latinum that was stolen from my personal
safe last night."
"Isn't that supposed to be Odo's job?" the chief wanted to know.
Before Quark could reply, Steve jumped in with, "Oh, Mister Odo's very
busy right now, so he gave me the opportunity to fill in for him."
"Oh," was all O'Brien could say.
"I do not think you will find your latinum here," Worf growled. Quark
heard Blue's distinctive bark suddenly turn into a low growl. Win one
for the puppy, he thought.
"We're having a lot of fun looking for Blue's clues," Steve said. Quark
groaned, knowing what was coming next.
"Whose clues?" O'Brien asked.
"Blue's clues," Steve said.
"The puppy," Quark added by way of explanation. Worf growled. Blue
growled back.
O'Brien said, "Oh."
"We've already found one, in the tailor shop."
"Oh."
"We have to find two more pawprints, then we can go to our thinking
chair to solve the mystery!"
"Excuse me," O'Brien said, "but did you just say you're looking for pawprints?"
"Yes," Steve said, beginning to get excited. "We need to find --"
"Never mind, I don't what to know," O'Brien said. He looked at Quark.
"You're welcome to look around, but don't let Captain Sisko catch you."
"Thanks, Chief," Quark said.
"No problem," O'Brien said, returning to his work.
Quark followed Steve as he wandered around Ops, stopping at each station
or console for further examination. Each time he stopped, Steve said,
"Wow. This is *so* fascinating." He seemed to be particularly
interested in Dax' science station, and spent several minutes running
his hand across the smooth panels. When he was through, he turned to
Quark, a glazed look on his face, and said, "Do *you* ever wonder what
it's like to be a scientist?"
Quark had to admit that the thought had never occurred to him--there's
not much profit in science, especially when his primary trading partners
would be with the Federation--and moved on to the next station to avoid
hearing Steve wax eloquent about the amazing wonders of science. As he
did so, however, a gleam of light reflecting off a smooth, shiny surface
on the far side of Ops caught his attention. Curious, he wandered over
to check it out.
Sitting on the replicator pad, in plain sight of everyone in Ops, was a
bar of gold pressed latinum adorned with a distinctive blue pawprint.
"A clue! A clue! Quark found a clue!" Steve crowed in Quark's ear,
nearly shattering his eardrum. Quark clutched his head in agony.
"A what?" O'Brien asked, abandoning his post. Worf remained aloof.
"A clue!" Steve repeated, clapping Quark on the back. "Quark found a
pawprint!"
O'Brien retrieved the bar from the replicator pad and examined it. When
he was done, he handed it to Quark. "Looks like a bar of gold pressed
latinum to me," he concluded.
"With a blue pawprint on it, identifying it as one of Blue's clues,"
Steve explained patiently.
"Oh," O'Brien said.
Quark did as before and checked the underside for his identification.
Sure enough, it was one of his missing bars. He waved it at O'Brien and
demanded, "How did this get here?"
"How am I supposed to know, Quark? It's your bloody latinum!"
Quark continued his advance, backing O'Brien against the bulkhead. "Do
you think I don't know how high your holosuite tab is? With all that
time you and Doctor Bashir spend in your silly Alamo program, your
credits have dwindled down to nothing! Stealing my latinum to pay off
your debts is just the sort of thing I'd expect from a hu-monn."
O'Brien's normally bland, pale face had grown quite rubicund during
Quark's tirade, a sure sign that his legendary Irish temper was about to
erupt, but Quark didn't care. "Where's the rest of it, Chief?" he
screeched. "Where'd you hide the other 248 bars?"
"I don't *have* your precious latinum, Quark, and even if I did, do you
think I'd be so stupid as to leave it lying around where you could find it?"
"He has a point, Quark," Steve said.
"I don't care!" Quark complained. "You said the same thing about
Garak. Maybe it's a conspiracy." He glared at O'Brien.
The chief threw his hands up in the air. "I'm conspiring with Garak to
steal your latinum just so I can pay off my holosuite tab?"
"It does sound plausible," Steve said.
"Shut up!" Quark and O'Brien said in unison.
O'Brien stomped away. "I'm not going to listen to any more of your
ridiculous accusations, Quark," he snarled. "I suggest you get out of
Ops before Captain Sisko 'accidentally' discovers you're here. Take
your friend with you! And make sure --" He froze in mid-sentence and
stared at Worf, his eyes and mouth growing larger by the second. Then,
very quietly, he said, "I think you two should get over here. Now."
Steve and Quark looked at each other, confused, but obeyed. O'Brien
remained still, staring down at Worf's feet. For his part, Worf
remained stock-still, seemingly oblivious to the attention being given
to him, although there was a low, steady growl coming from deep within
his chest. When saw what had caught O'Brien's attention, he, too, froze
and stared at Worf's feet.
Blue was peeing on Worf.
"Oh, my," Steve said. Oh, my, indeed, Quark thought. This single
moment more than compensated for all the torture he had endured so far.
It would be a long time before he forgot this moment--or let Worf live
it down. It was almost worth the loss of 248 bars of gold pressed latinum.
The little creature must have been storing quite a reservoir for just
such a moment, for it took her a long time to empty her bladder. In the
meantime, O'Brien, Quark and Steve just stared at Worf's feet while Worf
tried to ignore them.
When she was finished, Blue looked up at Worf and gave him a spunky,
"Rro-rro!" leaped on to the engineering console, then bounded across to
the transporter pad. Before any of them knew what was happening, she
had disappeared in a shower of sparkles.
"where'd she go?" Quark wondered aloud, dreading the answer.
O'Brien dashed over to the console and checked the logs. "She must have
triggered the transporter when she jumped up here," he said. "It looks
like she's in Colonel Kira's quarters."
Quark groaned. There'd be hell to pay now. "We better go after her,"
he said to Steve.
Steve looked entirely too excited at the idea. He jumped on to the
transporter pad and beamed at O'Brien and Quark. "Let's go, then!" He
crouched low, as if he were about to jump again, then sang, "Blue
skiddoo, we can too!"
O'Brien hit the 'activate' command sequence and sent Steve after Blue.
"You want to go after him?" he asked Quark.
He was about to answer when, from the far side of the station, where
station personnel had their quarters, he heard an unmistakable scream.
"I think I'll walk," he said, and stepped on to the turbolift.
TBC...
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