Title: qagh qagh qagh qagh je
Author: Carolyn Winifred
cwinifred@yahoo.com
Series: DS 9
Rated: g for gagh
Archive: Anywhere.
Disclaimer: Between Paramount and Python, nothing is mine.
Summary: Quark, O'Brien and Bashir go for breakfast on the Rotarran, DS9 episode Shadows and Symbols. Quark has an inaccurate Klingon phrase book.
qagh, qagh, qagh qagh je.
Bashir walks into Rotarran mess hall. O'Brien walks in shortly after him.
Quark is already there, seated.
Bashir to O'Brien - Morning.
O'Brien to Bashir - Morning.
Klingon tebwI' - NuqneH
Bashir - What have you got, then?
tebwI' [a little testy] - egg bacon je;
egg sausage bacon je;
egg qagh je;
egg bacon qagh je;
egg bacon sausage qagh je;
qagh bacon sausage qagh je;
qagh egg qagh qagh bacon qagh je;
qagh qagh qagh egg qagh je;
qagh qagh qagh qagh qagh qagh baked beans qagh qagh qagh qagh je;
or lobster with sauce, Saurian brandy, a fried Tokvirian skink egg on top
qagh je.
O'Brien - Have you got anything without qagh in it?
tebwI' - qagh, egg, sausage qagh je. That's not got much qagh in it.
O'Brien - I don't want any qagh.
Bashir - Why can't he have egg, bacon qagh sausage je?
O'Brien - That's got qagh in it!
Bashir - Not as much as qagh egg sausage qagh je.
O'Brien - Look, could I have egg bacon qagh sausage je without the qagh.
tebwI' - Uuuugggh!
O'Brien - What do you mean uuugggh! I don't like qagh.
Klingons in mess hall [singing]- qagh qagh qagh qagh qagh qagh qagh qagh
qagh qagh qagh qagh live qagh, wonderful qagh.
tebwI' - Shut up, shut up, shut up! You can't have egg bacon qagh sausage je
without the qagh.
O'Brien - Why not?
tebwI' - I won't do it. It wouldn't be egg bacon qagh sausage je, would it.
O'Brien - I don't like qagh!
Bashir - Don't make a fuss, Miles. I'll have your qagh. I love it. I'm
having qagh qagh qagh qagh qagh -.
Klingons in mess hall [singing]- qagh qagh qagh qagh.
Bashir - baked beans qagh qagh qagh qagh je.
tebwI' - baked beans are off.
Bashir - Well, can I have qagh instead?
tebwI' - You mean qagh qagh qagh qagh qagh qagh qagh qagh qagh qagh?
Klingons in mess hall [singing]- qagh qagh qagh qagh.
Bashir - Yes.
tebwI' - Arrggh!.
Klingons in mess hall [singing]- live qagh, wonderful qagh.
tebwI' - Shut up! Shut up!
Klingons shut up. Even the Ferengi.
Quark - Great boobies. Moogie, my lower intestine is full of qagh, egg,
qagh, bacon, qagh, tomato, qagh.
Klingons in mess hall [singing]- qagh qagh qagh qagh.
tebwI' - Shut up!
An officer rushes in and bundles the Ferengi out.
Quark - Nipples all over the place.
Cut to Communications Officer at his station.
Communications Officer - Another great Klingon story was at the Monac
shipbuilding space station. Once again the Klingon strategy was the same.
They sailed from Deep Space Nine here [indicating map]. They waited for the
stormy north-easterly wind. Once at Monac they assembled in the mess hall
and qagh selecting a qagh particular qagh item from the qagh menu would qagh
qagh qagh qagh qagh.
Wall moves sideways to reveal mess hall.
Klingons sing, Communications Officer conducts them.
Klingons [singing]- qagh qagh qagh qagh qagh live qagh, wonderful, qagh live
qagh, wonderful qagh.
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