From suzvoy@tesco.net Wed Dec 15 11:42:38 1999
Title: Tuvok The Vulcan
Author: Suz
Contact: suzvoy@tesco.net / suzvoy@yahoo.com
Series: Voy XMAS FILK/PARODY
Rating: R
Code: Tu
Part: 1/1 NEW
Date: 15th December 1999
Summary: What if pon farr happened at Christmas? To the tune of 'Frosty The
Snowman'. Rated R, just in case.
Archive: Do it!
Disclaimer - Paramount own the names.
*
Tuvok the Vulcan
Was a very stolid soul
With a raised eyebrow and a flared nostril
All the feeling he would show
Tuvok the Vulcan
Is so logical they say
He would barely show but the crew all know
How he came to life one day
There must have been
A chemical imbalance in his brain
When he arrived at the holodeck
He danced without restrain
O Tuvok the Vulcan
Was alive as he could be
And the crew all say he could laugh
And play just the same as you and me
Humpety hump hump
Humpety hump hump
Look at Tuvok go
Humpety hump hump
Humpety hump hump
Shagging the girls we know
Tuvok the Vulcan
Knew his mind had gone astray
But he said "Let's run and
we'll have some fun now before I'm beamed away."
Out of the doorway
with his doo-dah in his hand
Running fast and quick all around the ship
Saying "Catch me if you can."
He led them down the corridor
Right to the Holodoc
He only stopped when he felt a hiss
And a yell of "Shit, Tuvok!"
For Tuvok the Vulcan
Had to be stretchered away
But he waved goodbye saying "Don't you cry
I'll be back again some day - seven years, in fact."
Humpety hump hump
Humpety hump hump
Look at Tuvok go
Humpety hump hump
Humpety hump hump
Shagging the girls we know!
~FINIS
--
Officially dubbed "Evil incarnate" by Eri and Martha
"What are you listening to?"
"A selection from Tom's jazz database--it really swings."
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