Season Two

Popularity

Summary: Lisa tries to be popular by doing others' homework. Yeah, like this ever works.
Songs: Be Popular, Work Out, Don't Wanna Play Games
Ivan Factor: 5
Ivan Moments:

Scissors Paper Rock
Ivan as part of the pinball machine. Not just any part...the FLIPPERS!
The camera guesses Ivan is Walnut in "Where's Walnut"
Ivan as computer chess game (hmmm.....Deep Blue much?)
Ivan attacks the cameraman during closing credits.

Ivan Quotes: "I'm the snot nosed little brat who's nothing but trouble."
"This game sucks 16-bit microchips."

Environment

Summary: All about saving the environment, gets quite preachy and Lisa Vale sings an annoying song.
Songs: Disaster Area, One, and this other one we always fast forward through that involves throwing cardboard microphones.
Ivan Factor: 6
Ivan Moments:

Ivan writhes on the floor and hits himself with a broom during "Disaster Area"
He does pushups during the first bumper music.
He lifts up his shirt and exposes his stomach during the Sally Blubbers skit.
Ivan as "String, internationally renowned rock star and self-proclaimed environmental spokesman."
Sigmund and Troy! Sigmund and Troy! Sigmund and Troy!

Ivan quotes: "Ve are just two silly Germans in flashy outfits." (UPDATE: Ivan doesn't actually say this, but I think it sums up the episode quite nicely anyway. And it is said about Ivan. So there.)

Pets

Summary: Ivan and Lisa try to convince their family to get a puppy.
Songs: Bark, Baby, Bark
Ivan Factor: 7- he looks like a big candy cane in red and white, and the Triumvirate wants to lick him all over...(oh, wait, I forgot, we're a family page.)
Ivan Moments:

Ivan throws a tantrum
His hood falls over his face during Bumper #1
Ivan fakes the throw
Ivan is about to sing in this one, he's got the mic and everything, but John cuts him off, saying "It's just a suckey sock dog."

Ivan Quotes: "Oh boy, it's an Irish Setter!"
"It looks like some sort of suckey sock."
"It smells like someone burned crabcakes in here and then rubbed them on their sweaty feet."

Divorce

Summary: Ivan, as Chris Anykid, wants a stepdad since all his friends have them.
Songs: Lost on an Ocean, Can't Let Go
Ivan Factor: 7
Ivan Moments:

Ivan wears a ridiculous white wig in Bumper #2
As the Sound Effect Boy in Stepfamily Feud
Cute closeup on closing credits, holding a real guitar.

Ivan Quotes: "I hope this next sketch helps me more than the last one did."
"Well, I'm a little troubled and I can't sleep." (who's sleeping, Ivan?)

Trouble

Summary: Ivan, as Greg Anykid, gets in trouble. 'Nuff said.
Songs: Detention Hall Blues, Toe Jam, Love Has No Voice
Ivan Factor: 7
Ivan Moments:

Doesn't that Tried-it gum look like Gak(tm)?
Wayne's world addicts
Ivan sings during Detention Hall Blues, even if he just screams and wails a lot...
Dances alone in Bumper #2
At the end of the parental dream sequence, Ivan bounces up and down and pants.
The little "gimme a beat" gesture he makes at the beginning of "Love Has No Voice" is quite cute.
Going to sleep
Ivan says the magic words at the end.

Ivan Quotes: "I didn't lose your tools...a huge spider came along and ate them."
"This game blows booster shot."
"As bad as it may sound, I may have to follow the rules."

Independence

Summary: Natalie is sick of being a goody-two-shoes and rebels against her parents.
Songs: Changes Made, Holding Me Too Close
Ivan Factor: 5- When we do see him, he looks SOOO good, but that's the problem; we never see him.
Ivan Moments:

Ivan as the announcer in the infamous Tori Spelling Bee skit.
Pelvic gyrations in Bumper #1
The facial expression during the Gross-up skit
THEX screaming during the movie skit
Showing off his tattoo as the most handsome, yet rebellious, man on the planet (and did we mention that this tattoo is the Ukrainian symbol for peace and freedom?)

Ivan Quotes: "Well, this evening I'll be whistling Rimsky-Korsakoff's 'Flight of the Bumblebee.'"

Fear

Summary: Lisa, as Kathy Anykid, is afraid to ask Mason McGooey (aka Mark) to the school Backwards Dance. Ivan plays Jeff Anykid, the younger bro.
Songs: They're Everywhere, If I Give You My Heart
Ivan Factor: 6
Ivan Moments:

Ivan tries to signal to Mark that he has a sandwich stuck to his face.
The triumphant expression he gets after they flip Micki in Bumper #1
The dancing and screaming during the scary song.
Ivan goes to Dad when he needs his package tied. (heh heh, I said 'package')

Ivan Quotes: "It'll make you wish for a slide projector!"
"Cootie shots forever!"
"If I only had some sort of judicial recourse in this, my darkest hour."

NOTES: Ivan choreographed the whole of this episode.

Best Friends

Summary: Julene and Lisa as best friends get into a fight.
Songs: War, The Bridge
Ivan Factor: 4
Ivan Moments:

Performs the opening monologue
Ivan "marries" Mark
During bumper #1, Ivan does some great floor moves.
It is Ivan who brings the wall between the feuding friends.

Ivan Quotes: "Being alone can get kind of lonely."
"Hey, who cut the fax!"
"Who has time to wait for your hormones to kick in?'

NOTES: Ivan choreographed 1/2 of this episode.

New Baby

Summary: Ivan as Doug Anykid (and Lisa as Julie Anykid)cope with the burdens which come with a new baby brother, Joey, played by Mark.
Songs: There's A Baby, Miracle
Ivan Factor: 8
Ivan Moments:

What the fish is he looking at during the family meeting?
Wailing in anguish during the Wheel of Fortune parody
More great floor moves in Bumper #1
Pea Monkeys! Yes, bedwetting is no longer embarassing, but bouncing up and down with a pillow in your lap may be.
PELVIC THRUST ALERT!!! Bumper #2
Ivan gets his leg blown off by the lawnmower
The happy look he gets when he holds the baby
Perhaps most importantly, Ivan raps during "Miracle"

Ivan Quotes: "A priest is coming to live with us?"
"Marky Mark needs covering up. A grown man walking around in his underwear!"
"He ain't heavy, he's my brother."

Summer

Summary: Ivan as Joey Anykid gets a job as a paperboy(!!) in order to buy a new bike, and learns A Valuable Lesson on Responsibility.
Songs: Won't Let This Summer End, On Vacation
Ivan Factor: 9 whoo boy!
Ivan Moments:

Ivan rides around in a wagon and gets a dirty sock stuffed in his mouth.
The bike skit is quite sexual.
Ivan dances on his back in Bumper #1 while the Triumvirate lives vicariously through Micki. We also live vicariously through her in bumper #2
Ivan shakes in fear while holding a palm frond and attacks Grandma during "Geriatric Park"
Throwing papers into the audience. "Hey, read this scrap!" uh, wait, wrong Dudynsky project.
Pretending to play a fake guitar during "Summertime Blues"
The Triumvirate has often wished Ivan would perform his Roundhouse episodes in Speedos. There is a skit on a bladder-powered swimsuit that will probably be the only chance we will ever get to see him in Speedos, albeit fully clothed while wearing them.

Ivan Quotes: "This job thing's a pain in the banana seat."
"Boo-yeah. She's a knock-- I mean, she's OK."
"We're all doomed to fester in the putrid plastic highways of our industrialized despair."

Technology

Summary: Ivan, as Dave Anykid, must deal with the ethical dilemma of hacking into the school computer to change the school bully's grades or saving his conscience but getting his ass kicked.
Songs: Defender of the Universe, Talk to Me
Ivan Factor: 8- and we love the bowling shirt! We also love the Lennon glasses!
Ivan Moments:

Looking at Lisa's chest, Ivan says "Your face doesn't ring a bell."
David bites Ivan and gives him purple nerples.
REPEATED PELVIC THRUST ALERT-- Bumper #1
Chair dancing in Bumper #2
Ivan gets put to bed and tucked in. It's cute.
Ivan wears a gas mask during yet another tasteless flatulence skit.
Dad says he will include with his TV/VCR repair kit the latest in remote control technology, and then commands Ivan to change the channel. So we're wondering then if we order it, does Ivan come with it?

Ivan Quotes: "How did you find me? I was doing my best locker impression."
"I can beat this guy intellectually. It's a case of brains versus brawn."

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