10 REASONS TO LOVE SOAPS
Ever notice how the people who are most dismissive about soap operas have never actually watched one? Next time somebody takes a dig at daytime, ask them why they don't like soaps. Then watch' em squirm and stammer as they search for a valid response. While you're at it, get them to explain why the sight of, say Dennis Franz's bare rump on NYPD BLUE, is more appealing than seeing YOUNG AND RESTLESS's Shemar Moore doing anything! Here are a few reasons to tune in that you'll want to pass along to your sadly soap-deprived friends.
1. Romance
Love stories are the backbone of daytime dramas. Think of the enduring tale
of GUIDING LIGHT's Reva and Josh. Their bond is stronger than any force in
the universe. Not even "death," a clingy clone or mind control drugs can
sever their bond. Though its been 18 years since Luke and Laura tied the
knot, loyal GENERAL HOSPITAL fans can still recall cutting school
or calling in sick to watch the historic event.
2. Drama
BOLD AND BEAUTIFUL's junior vixen, Amber, is in quite a pickle. She's
pregnant and claims the father is wealthy Rick. If that's the case, this baby
is her key to a cushy future. But if the baby is the result of one hazy night
with singer Raymond, she'll be ecscorted off the gravy train. Amber would be
perfectly happy lying about the child's paternity forever, but since Rick is
white and Raymond's black, what are the chances of that working? The fact
that neither guy is really interested in Amber only complicates matters
further. Ever see a twisted tale like that on ER?
3. Comedy
People who don't watch soaps assume that they're all about weepy hospital-bed
monologues. They're so wrong. PORT CHARLES's Lynn Herring (Lucy) combines
comedy and glamour in a way that makes us suspect she's channeling the spirit
of Lucille Ball. Our ears perk up whenever ALL MY CHILDREN's Michela E.
Knight (Tad) is on-screen because he's sure to toss off a classic bon mot. Sure,
they may be called daytime dramas, but some of the funniest moments on TV
take place before the sun sets.
4. Mystery
AS THE WORLD TURN's David is dead and buried ... or so we thought. ALL MY
CHILDREN's Kit clains that Ryan raped her, and the DNA test says there's a 70
percent chance that he's the perpetrator. Then again, Kit has cried rape
before- and her brother is the district attorney. Hmmm....
5. Adventure
After accidentally killing creepy Mick, GUIDING LIGHT's Michelle had to hide
her role in the death from Danny, Mick's vengeful brother. Danny caught on,
but fell for Michelle. Rather than murder her in retaliation, Danny married
Michelle in order to protect her from his less-forgiving family. Now,
Michelle's married to the mob and planning on ratting them out to the FBI.
Our guess is that when she wakes up to her new hubby's considerable charms,
she'll have a change of heart. Or, you could see what cute thing the dog is
doing on MAD ABOUT YOU.
6. Storytelling
Let's say you're watching a two-hour TV movie about a man who discovers that
his presumed-dead wife is alive. That includes about 10 minutes of reviewing
the couple's relationship prior to her "death." Factor in 10 minutes for the
plane crash, drowning, whatever. Then give the hero 40 minutes of rebuilding
his life, remarrying, ect. This leaves less than an hour (with commercials)
for our hero to deal with the fact that his first love is back. Now think
about SUNSET BEACH's Meg/Ben/Maria triangle. Ben found out that Maria was
alive five months ago and he's still dealing with the fallout. Prime-time
writers can only skim the surface due to time constraints. Soap writers weave
tales that take years to resolve.
7. Social Issues
TV's first legal abortion took plale on daytime when ALL MY CHILDREN's Erica
(the greatest diva EVER) terminated a pregnancy in 1973, the year of the Roe
v. Wade decision. In 1995, GENERAL HOSPITAL tackled AIDS by showing its
effects on a beloved character, Stone. ONE LIFE TO LIVE's Jessica is a nice
girl from an
upstanding family who had unprotected sex with a nice boy from a similar
backround, and now she's pregnant. Just yesterday Jessica got hit by a car
which killed her baby. Now don't try to tell us that soaps aren't
realistic. Which
doesn't mean that they can't occasionally treat us to ...
8. Fantasy
Aliens, schmaliens, Scully and Mulder of THE X-FILES have nothing on DAYS OF
OUR LIVES's Marlena, who battled satanic possession. SUNSET BEACHers were
vexed by cursed jewels. And ANOTHER WORLD's Jordan Stark can seemingly summon
the dead.
9. History
How much do we really know about THE NANNY? What was ALL McBEAL's life like
before she became a lawyer? Now ask us about our favorite soap denizens. We
know all about their love lives, career histories, medical conditions, and
financial situations. That's called an emotional investment in the character,
folks!
10. Longevity
GUIDING LIGHT, the longest-running soap, has been on television since 1952,
and it was on the radio before that. Name a sitcom or drama that could
survive 45 years. No summer breaks. No reruns. Soaps are there for us five days a week, 52 weeks a year (barring the occasional impeachment hearing or the Olympics). And we're there for soaps. We rest our case.