dance5

Dance of Hearts

written by: Calla

part 5

Holding two medication bottles up to the light, Desiree's brow furrowed.

"Now should I take these so I don't know what's going on?", she said indicating one, then the other," Or these so I won't care?"

Hilde had given her both of them, saying she thought she would need them. At the time she didn't think she would.but she knew it was going to hurt the first time, and she was beginning to admit that she really was a nervous wreck too. She wanted SOMETHING to calm her down. The knowledge that it WOULD hurt made her barely controllable. She knew Quatre would be as gentle as anyone could ever be... but still...

"I don't know if can do this." Quatre said from behind her.

He had said nothing for almost an hour. Just occasionally giving her a nervous and worried look. He seemed like HE needed one of these things too.

"We don't have to you know. I could just tell them we did." Quatre said looking at her from the other side of the bed. "I mean, they don't check for "the blood" anymore, so I could just say..."

"Quatre," Desiree cut in, "they'll still know. After two people make love they always act different towards one another. For better, or worse."

She had noticed this, and came to know the signals herself between couples. He closed his eyes, and nervously licked his lips to moisten them. She put the pills down, and scooted herself to him, laying her hands on his shoulders. Slowly she began to massage them. He was SO tense.

"I don't want to hurt you." he whispered as he stared at the carpeted floor.

She stopped massaging his shoulders and neck, and snaked her arms around his waist, resting her head on his back. She felt his body somehow tense up even more at the contact. 'If anyone should be worried about hurting someone, it should be me over you.' She could tell him now. No one would dare interrupt them right now. But she couldn't... something inside her made her want to keep him from pulling away. The same something wanted him to hold her in return. Touch her, kiss her... make love to her. She didn't know what it was. Was her prayer already being answered?

"I suppose getting drunk is out of the question." he said with a hint of amusement, shifting to turn to look at her.

"If we were going to get drunk... we'd BE drunk by now.' she said at the same moment wondering if it WOULD be a good idea after all.

They had both drank up to their respective physical limits at the reception, knowing yet another limo driver would come to take them to the hotel they were staying in.

He leaned back into her arms, resting his head on her shoulder with a sigh. "Well, at least I helped you get out of your dress without freaking out." he said more to himself.

He could see why she needed help once she tried to get out of it herself. The buttons were held in their holes so tight that even he had trouble getting them undone. But then, his trembling hands probably didn't help matters.

"Quatre, you know what our problem is?" she asked in a voice one used when telling a dark secret.

"No...please tell me." Quatre said as he turned his head to look at her.

"We're thinking about this too much." Desiree answered with a smile. Quatre smiled and pulled himself up.

"Still I know it will hurt you. I don't know if I could, with that knowledge." he said sadly.

"That proves my point right there." she said turning him back around to face her.

Tentatively, she put a hand on his cheek, leaned in and proceeded to kiss him deeply. His lips were soft, and gentle, tasting of cool mints. She enjoyed his mouth against hers. The kiss was long, and became more heated when he responded to it, and encircling his arms around her, pulled her closely against him.

She didn't need to tell him. There was no need. Time would heal the wound until only Quatre was the one in her heart. But what about now? With that thought she broke the stream of kisses the first had become. 'I do have to tell him. I can't do this without him knowing.' She looked into his eyes. 'He cares too much for me as it is. He must know before we go any further.'

"Quatre, I have to tell you something." she said noticing how hungry for her his eyes had become.

She pulled out of his arms, and got off of the bed, and walked to the center of the room. His eyes followed her every move.

"What is it?" he asked seeing a worried look on her face. He got up and stood in front of her. He laid his hands on her shoulders, "Whatever it is... tell me."

Desiree's eyes began to shimmer with tears. He deserved better. This was going to hurt him. A knife somewhere inside of her heart began stabbing her as she looked into his eyes.

"Quatre, before we were betrothed I was involved with someone."

Quatre's lips turned up slightly on their ends. He had already guessed that much. "Okay,...go on."

"I, we...", she felt a tear slide down her cheek as se spoke, "fell in love with each other. We..." He stopped her speaking with two fingers to her lips.

"I understand, Desiree. I know your not in love with me. You don't need to explain any further." Quatre said.

All this he had figured out on his own. Only pain of the heart, he realized, could hurt someone in the way she was hurt. He placed a soft kiss on her forehead.

"Another reason why I didn't think you'd want to. I don't want to do anything that you don't. I..." It was her turn to stop him from speaking.

"I want to." she said with conviction.

"Are you sure?" he asked just to be on the safe side.

She put a hand on each of his hips and stepped forward, closing any gap for personal space between them, pressing their bodies firmly together.

"Just kiss me." she said and pulled his head down so his lips would meet hers.

~~~~*~~~~

Quatre awoke still at twilight to the sound of muffled sobs. Trying to make himself figure out where they were coming from, he realized they were coming from the shivering body he held in his arms. Despite how groggy he was, his concern made his numb mind awaken. Slowly he shifted to sit up and look over the shoulder of his wife. Even in the near absent light he could still see her red eyes and tears.

She looked up at him, then buried her face in her pillows so he couldn't see it. Inside he felt his heart begin to break. Her face cam out of the pillow enough that he could hear her muffled words. "Didn't want to wake you..."

He slid the arm that was still around her waist up to her shoulder. He could only think of one reason why she would be crying. "I hurt you, didn't I? I didn't want to. I... it was too soon for us to do this."

His heart broke even more at the thought of it. She was crying for her lost love. The only one she probably ever thought that the intimacy they had shared just a few hours before would be with. The sight of him, his touch, probably revolted her. Quickly, he withdrew his arms and hands, and any part of his body that made even the slightest contact with her skin away. Scooting away to the other side of the bed, drawing his knees to his chest, and putting his hand over his face, he said," We won't do this anymore. Not until we're both ready."

He lowered his hands from his face and hugged his legs to his chest as he looked over at her. She was looking at him through teary eyes.

"I promise I'll never..." he stopped. The pain in her eyes and his heart was overwhelming. "Maybe we can still be friends. I..." He didn't know what to tell her. He didn't know what to do. "I never meant to hurt you in any way. I didn't mean to hurt you..." He put his hands back over his face as he looked away feeling tears of his own coming on.

She looked on-- crying harder. 'I've hurt HIM. He didn't hurt me. How can he even think...? Our night together could be described as nothing but. Both times we had been... together in the night. I didn't know it could be like that. I never knew any man could be so gentle... except the other man who is forcing us into this... this tango. Only he could compare. Yet, I wish I had never met him. I wish I could love this man before me wholeheartedly. If only I didn't fall asleep tonight. Then these tears wouldn't have come. In my dreams he is always there. He won't let me go. And I have hurt this innocent man, who is now my husband because he didn't know how deeply... he won't let me go Quatre. He just won't let me go.' She let out a soft moan, and her own tears made her spasm. It kept her from speaking.

Quatre fought off his own tears enough to swing his legs out of the bed and say," I'll go. I won't trouble you anymore with my being here any longer. If you need anything, I'll be in one of the other rooms."

The whole floor had been reserved for them, so he knew he could have any room he wanted. He pulled a robe over himself and got up. He took a step froward, but was halted by a firm pull on his arm, and Desiree screaming,"NO!!!"

He peered down at her. The look she was giving him made his soul ache. She placed a soft, wet kiss on his hand as she mumbled, "Don't leave me."

How could he deny her? He fell back into the bed as she pulled on his arm. She moved over to the other side of the bed to give him room to resituate himself. As soon as she saw he was comfortable and turning to look at her, she moved over to his side, and slid back down to lay on her side facing him. She put her head on his chest and wrapped her arms around his waist. Hesitantly, Quatre followed the motion, by holding her tight. Her grip around him occasionally would squeezed tighter as Quatre listened to her sobs, and felt her tears drop unto the exposed areas of his chest.

Finally she spoke through them. "You didn't hurt me. But your right..." She was forced to stop as she choked on her own tears, then continued, "I can't love you like this right now. I want to... but I can't. Not THIS intimately. I can't."

"I understand." he said softly.

"I..." She stopped as she buried her face in his chest for a moment. "I... don't want to be alone tonight." He felt a hard shiver course through her. "Don't leave me tonight. Please... don't leave me."

Her voice was needy and sorrowful. But what could he do? He felt a tear stream down his own cheek. " I won't leave you. But Desiree, how can I ease your pain?"

She squeezed him tight again. "Hold me."

Quatre inaudibly whispered okay, and drew her body as close to his as he could. It was all he knew to do.

~~~~*~~~~

THREE MONTHS LATER...

"Trowa won't you come? Please?" Quatre begged of his friend over the phone.

Desiree looked up at her husband from her book. She shook her head in a gesture of bewilderment and frustration at her husband's situation. What kind of best friend do you call yourself when you won't even come to your best friend's SISTER'S wedding? Let alone his own? She watched with pain as she saw Quatre's face begin to drown in disappointment.

"But why?" he asked, hiding only barely how he felt. "I see. Well your still welcome to come if you think you can make it." Quatre said hanging his head.

Desiree glanced at Rashid, who stood with his arms crossed over his chest, his face expressionless. He always seemed so... cool to her.

"Okay, bye." Quatre hung up the phone and stood with his hand clenched into fists. He looked up at Desiree with hurt eyes. "He isn't coming."

"Why?" she couldn't help but ask.

"He says he has prearranged engagements that he HAS to attend." Quatre answered a hint of bitterness in his voice.

"I'm sorry, I know how much it meant to you that he'd come." Desiree said putting down her book, getting up, and crossing the room to stand by her husband's side.

He wanted to cry, Desiree could tell. In their six months together they had learned to red each other. when the other was upset, happy, nervous, and so on. She had also learned how much he cared about Trowa. He was in Quatre's eyes like a brother. She put her arms around him and gave him a gentle squeeze. He put his arms around her as comfort. It was something they did a lot. Only it was usually the other way around. they slept in the same bed off and on, because there were times when Desiree, and sometimes Quatre couldn't bear to sleep alone. Each found solace in the other's warming embrace. He always came to her room. She had yet to step foot in his. They had done nothing more than hold each other, and on rare occasions, kiss, in take nights they were together.

He pulled away and began to walk while he held her hand. He shook his head. He didn't understand Trowa at all. It was if he was avoiding him. But what did he do?

"I don't understand. He's supposed to be my best friend." Quatre said aloud.

Desiree sighed, her growing affection for him making her heart ache. She wrapped her arms around him as they walked across the room and out the door.

Rashid watched them leave, then stepped around the desk and looked at the two photos Quatre had there. One was of his young master and Trowa, the other a picture of his wife. He glanced back at the one of the two pilots together.

"He IS your best friend Master Quatre, that's why he doesn't come"

~~~~*~~~~

Part 6

THREE MONTHS LATER:

"Rashid, I'm going to tell her!" Quatre stated determined.

"Master Quatre, it's your WEDDING day! Your not even ceremonially married yet! Why complicate all the emotional hiatus with more?"Rashid tried to reason.

"Why keep it from her?" Quatre asked coldly.

"Duo is in the wedding party. If you tell her before the wedding event takes place she may want to adjust it, and we're all nervous as it is!" Rashid exclaimed gesturing wildly.

"I'm AWARE of how nervous we all are Rashid! I'M a nervous wreck! I just think it'll break the monotony of it all is she and Duo meet and know they are brother and sister. I'm going to tell her." Quatre concluded.

He finished tying his bow tie to his tux and stepped outside the room. Looking around he saw Duo off in a corner with Wufei and Heero. he walked up to them, exchanged a greeting with them, and promptly grabbed Duo by the wrist and pulled him away as he walked.

"Man, I've heard of jitters, but I've never heard of needing help in escaping." Duo commented as he was led through the estate and up the stairs leading to where the ladies were taking care of Desiree. "Hey man! Where are we going?"

"I need you to meet my fianc�e'." Quatre said as they finally reached the end of the stairs, and rounded a corner.

"Can't it wait until AFTER the wedding?"

"No."Quatre stated still leading him by the wrist.

"Quatre, man, I have NO objections to meeting beautiful women and all that...and I heard your fianc�e' is a real looker, but I prefer to do it with their clothes ON! I'm married remember?" Duo asked as they finally came to the door.

Quatre did not pay any attention. He was too bust knocking on the door.

"Yes? Who is it?" they heard Relena say on the other side.

"It's me, Quatre."

"And me!" Duo shouted.

"What do you want?" Relena asked her voice louder, telling them she was by the door.

"We need to come in!" Quatre shouted.

"Haven't you ever heard it's bad luck to see your bride just before the wedding? And in her dress too?" Hilde chirped from within.

"Yeah, can't it wait?" Relena asked.

"No..."Quatre said, growing impatient. He was already nervous, he didn't need to be unhumored now.

"Quatre...hey! What are you doing?" they heard Relena say as the door swung open to reveal a dazzling Desiree.

She didn't even really look at them, she just returned to her spot in front of the mirror.

"Oh, this is bad. This is very, very, bad." Hilde said shaking her head.

"It's just superstition Hilde... Yes? What is it?" Desiree asked turning to look at them.

Quatre stepped inside while Duo remained out in the hall. "I need you to meet someone."

"Okay..." Desiree responded with a look of confusion. What was so important about THAT?

"Duo, get in here!" Quatre yelled.

Duo did a double take. He never heard Quatre yell before. He stepped inside and eyed him. "You REALLY ARE nervous aren't you?"

Quatre threw him a lopsided grin, then turned back to Desiree. He was about to say something when he saw the look on her face. It was one of disbelief, and in a weird way hope.

"Anthony?" she whispered, narrowing her eyes as she looked at Duo.

"Huh?" Duo looked at her as if she had lobsters crawling out of her ears.

"Anthony Lerach? Anthony?" Desiree repeated coming forward as if spell bound.

Anthony Lerach? The name sounded familiar to Duo, but from where? Why?

She stood in front of him now,looking as if she was about to cry. "Anthony?" She looked at Quatre. "Quatre?"

"Yes..." Quatre replied softly. Her gaze shifted back to Duo with a smile, as tears formed in her eyes.

"Hey what's going on?" Duo asked completely confused by this interchange.

"Duo, this is Desiree. My fianc�e'...your sister." Quatre introduced watching his reactions.

"Sister? But my sister..." Duo looked at her in disbelief, and suddenly, as if hit by lighting, the realization dawned on him. "MY SISTER!" he shouted next, and grabbed her up into a bear hug, lifting her off the ground, and doing something no one thought Duo would ever do--crying.

He pulled her away, and looked her over. "I thought you were dead. I thought you were dead..." He grabbed her tightly again.

"Anthony?" she huffed after a few minutes. "Can you let go of me?"

Duo began rocking her back and forth. "Why?"

"I can't breathe." she said in a breathless voice.

"Alright, we can continue the family reunion during the reception. Out both of you! We still need to get her hair done, and now, redo her makeup." Relena said starting to usher the men out the door. Once outside, she came out, and closed the door behind her.

"Thanks Quatre!" Duo said in delight and grabbed Quatre up in the same type of hug he just put his sister through.

"Your welcome. And Duo, your stronger than you think you are, cause I can't breathe either." Quatre stated after a couple moments.

"Oh sorry." He let go with a teary eyed look of happiness. "I've got to tell Heero and Wufei."

"Go ahead Duo...I need to talk to Quatre alone for a minute." Relena said with a smile.

Practically on the verge of dancing, Duo made his way back tot he other pilots.

"What is it Relena?" Quatre asked watching Duo start down the stairs.

"I noticed Trowa isn't here. Did he tell you why?" Relena asked somber.

"No. He just said he didn't think he should come." Quatre said sadly.

"Quatre..." Relena glanced at the closed door, then back at him. "...tonight your going to have to take things slow." She looked down at the carpeted floor of her estate, then back up into Quatre's worried eyes.

"Is it because she's a ...", he blushed scarlet at the word, "virgin?"

Relena considered for a moment or two. "Well, yes, partly. I mean she is a virgin, and it will hurt her the first time...but after that..."

She watched the Arabian's blush glow even deeper. "I don't want to hurt her. Even the first time..." Quatre said looking away.

"Well, you really have no choice in that...it's the will of mother nature there..." Relena stopped. This was so NOT what she meant to talk about. "Quatre..."

"You think if I sort of get her a sedative or something?" Quatre asked eyes brightening in hope.

He never knew it would hurt the woman the first time she ever made love. He didn't EVER want to hurt her, or anyone again.

Relena had to choke down a laugh. "Ummm, Quatre, I don't think you'll need to worry about it... but what I needed to talk to you about is completely different. You see, before she..."

"Hey! We gotta go! Car's waiting...we have to leave or we'll be late." came Abdul's cheery voice, followed by the other three pilots, and Rashid.

Duo was still being overly joyous at finding his sister again. "Heero, isn't it GREAT?!" Then he gathered the stern pilot in a hug.

"Get off of me!" Heero shouted.

Duo immediately let go, and took a few steps back. "Sorry man. I'm just so happy."

"No one said you CAN'T be happy, Duo, just don't include ME in it!" Heero said walking to stand next to his wife.

"Wu-man!" Duo said opening his arms for a hug.

"I DON'T think so." Wufei said, and started to walk away.

Sulking Duo followed with Abdul and Rashid.

"Quatre, if you live through this ceremony, I'm going to kill you." Heero said in a serious voice.

Quatre's eyes widened. He knew in Heero's case he just might mean it.

"Quit looking at me like a scared kitten, Quatre. Go to the car." Heero said a little more gently.

Still wide eyed Quatre walked away. When he rounded to corner Heero gave his wife an inquiring look.

"Did you tell him?"

"I tried Heero. I tried." Relena said, her eyes narrowing.

"Are you going to try again after the ceremony?"

"No. I don't think I will" Relena said thoughtfully.

"Why not?" Heero asked harshly. "He needs to know."

"It won't do any good now. In the eyes of the kingdom their already married, now that the contracts are signed. Besides, he knows with his position there would be a price to pay." Relena said sadly. "Peace and the Colonies would never let either of them back out of it now Heero. I tried to intervene. Remember?" she asked looking at her husband who nodded. "There's nothing I can do."

"If you ask me, the price of our peace is starting to have a pretty high cost." Heero said with a glare, then walked away to join to groom's party.

~~~~*~~~~

Aside from Quatre's disappointment of Trowa's absence, stumbling over some of the vows, and at one point his own name, then someone bringing a cell phone that started ringing during Desiree's "I do", and the same phone distracting them again when it was time to kiss, making them burst out laughing hysterically, and Heero getting up into the mic saying. "Turn the phone off, or I'll kill you.", left them only enough nerve to kiss chastely on the lips, the ceremony went smoothly.

Quatre beamed at his wife, who couldn't help but give him flirtatious looks. Over the three months they had been together, she did develop a fierce infatuation for him, and both were moving into a close friendship. However, her own heart plagued her. She was still in love with another man. She was doing all she could not to be. She wanted to love Quatre, he deserved no less, but she couldn't deny the fact that her own heart was not ready to let the other man go yet. Being an extremely religious person, something that's neither of the two men understood very well, (but Quatre took it better than the other one did), she always felt guilty when with Quatre. She tried telling him several times, but was always interrupted, or lost her nerve. 'Maybe now all will come together. Dear God, you've chosen THIS man to be the one I spend the rest of my life with. Each day I understand the reasons why more and more, but it hurts no less. Help me let go just a little of the other one. Please...', she prayed as they rode in a limo to the reception.

Quatre seemed even more nervous now to her, than during the ceremony. She started giggling when she remembered him stumbling over his own name, and how red his face was when he did it.

Quatre gave her a look of complete bewilderment. "What's so funny?"

She looked at him again then broke out into outright laughter.

"What?" he asked, a smile teasing his lips.

"Nothing..."she said unconvincingly through a laugh.

"WHAT?!"

"You promise you won't get mad?" she asked trying to bite down on the giggles.

"Yes. What?" he asked his eyebrows narrowing in suspicion.

"I was just thinking about how you looked when you messed up your own name. I'm sorry...it shouldn't be that funny, but..."

She stopped when she saw him put his hands over his face in embarrassment. She completely stopped laughing when she saw his body shake with-- sobs? her smile diminished.

"Quatre, I'm sorry. I didn't mean it like that...I..." her eyes got wide when he tore his hands away from his face and looked at her. He WAS crying-- but because he was laughing so hard.

"I know,my middle name is now 'Rabern'..." he burst out, then collapsed into the seat, head laid back on the seat's top, a hand over his stomach.

Feeling safe to laugh again, she started to join in the merry glee. She was happy now. He didn't seem as nervous as he was.

The laughter was enough to cause the limo driver to look back at them through the glass when he reached a red light. He gave them a look, and turned around mumbling about driving lunatics around all the time.

Quatre looked at his wife through blurry eyes. She was so very beautiful when she laughed, and he loved the way her laughter sounded. It was musical to him. He felt his heart beat even faster when her eyes opened and she looked straight into his. Both stopped laughing at the same time and she shyly looked away, he looked at her with mixed emotions and thoughts.

'I want to sit closer to her. Put my arms around her. Kiss her. But will she let me?' He had in three months come to care deeply for her. He had no regrets that he marries her. He knew there were things that she wanted to tell him. Things she had TRIED to tell him. He knew it had to be important for he noticed how haunted and hurt her eyes looked when she began to. He always wanted nothing more than to kiss that hurt away. What was it that plagued his beautiful wife so deeply? He smiled when she looked up at him again with a gentle turn on her lips.

"Well, are you going to do it?" she asked to his confusion.

"Do what?"

She began to smooth out the wrinkles in her white lace skirt. "What you want to do." she answered quietly.

He blushed and turned away. Did she know Was it THAT obvious? He looked back at her, ten timidly he scooted over the seat until he was sitting as close beside her as he could get. He took her left hand in his right and laced his fingers through hers. He looked away again. He didn't dare go any further than that. THAT would be forced to come later tonight. He felt nervous tension he had left behind for a few minutes come back. How can he do this? How?

"That's it?" Desiree with disappointment.

She was sure he wanted to kiss her. She was sure he had wanted to kiss her many times before this. They didn't need to be ...careful anymore, they were married. With a high degree of joy she realized she WANTED him to kiss her, and that she was looking forward to the events that were to come that night when they left the reception.

He looked at her wide eyed. "What else? What did you want me to do?"

Embarrassed, she turned and looked out the window briefly before meeting his eyes again.

--------------

"I thought you wanted to... you know..." She timidly raised a hand to his lips.

He felt as though an electric shock went through his blood at her touch. But the type that felt weirdly good. "I... I do. will you let me?"

Dumb question, he knew. She wouldn't be talking about it if she didn't. But should he? His eyes were hungry for her, he knew. But the question that persisted in his mind as of late was still there...why?

She nodded with a smile, and gentle laugh. Still he hesitated. She turned to look back out the windows. 'He does want to. He's just holding back. which right now is the LAST thing I need him to do' Her smile came back when she felt his hand under her chin turning her head to look at him.

His breath escaped him as her eyes met his yet again. 'Just do it!' he told himself. He leaned forward and brushed his lips against hers. They were soft, and tasted sweet to him. When he pulled back he saw her open her eyes and raise her eyebrows inquiringly.

"More?" he asked hopeful.

She looked at him flirtatiously, as she hooded her eyelids and smiled at him. he took that as a yes. He cupped her face in his hand, pulled her closer to him, and kissed her deeper. His mind began to whirl... He pulled back slightly, keeping his lips lingering two inches from hers.

"Again?" he inquired, then without waiting for an answer pulled her as tightly against him as he could, and met her lips again. the kiss became the deepest of kisses, permeated with passion. He swooned when he felt her arms encircle him.

Suddenly, their car door opened to reveal three faces that were grinning ear to ear. Pulling away out of breath, they looked up at the faces of Duo, Hilde and Wufei.

"Can't save it for the honeymoon, huh?" Duo asked. "Glad your her husband Quatre, cause now that I know she's my sister I'm going to be a bit protective."

The two newlyweds gave the three innocent looks, and hurried out of the car.

"I think you two better make your presence known. Relena's going crazy in there trying to hold back the guests and photographers for you two." Wufei said.

"Hmn..." was all the answer Desiree gave him, and hurried inside.

Wufei caught Quatre's arm. "I guess you didn't need my advice after all." he whispered with a smirk.

Quatre's eyes widened, then blushing he rushed forward, catching up with his wife.

"I think they'll be alright." Duo said more to himself than anyone.

"It's too early to tell. Their lives together have hardly begun.' Wufei said walking forward to the building's doors.

"Yes, but at least what we just witnessed HAS to be a good sign." Hilde chimed in.

Wufei stopped and turned to look at each one in turn. "We'll see."

Wufei didn't dare reveal that he was certain as well that things would be okay between Quatre and Desiree. They certainly started out better than he and his Meiren did. Meiren...no one knew that he had in fact loved her. Except if they looked down into his soul deep enough-- in his eyes, then they would know he did. Just as he knew what not even Quatre realized yet...that Quatre was in love with his Desiree.

~~~~*~~~~

"How do you think things will go tonight for them?" Heero asked Relena as they sat in the quietness of their room.

Relena looked up at her husband with a mixture of hope and worry. "I don't know. She tried to tell him again you know."

"What happened?" Heero asked helping her pull her nightgown over her when she somehow got lost in it.

"Someone interrupted them again. I think this time it was Rashid. It's like there are forces at work preventing anyone form telling him." Relena said in disgust.

Heero picked up the book he had been reading and opened it. "Think she'll try again?"

"No. I think she's more worried about getting HIM through tonight." Relena said with a smile.

"I know, he stayed until he couldn't any longer." Heero said shaking his head,not allowing Relena to see the smile on his face.

"You should've bee there when we were talking about how we had to help her get the gown on..." Relena said with a laugh.

"Why?"

"let's just say, when we told him how he'd have to also help her out of it, and tried to show him how to unhook the buttons, I was afraid he'd faint!" Relena said giggling.

"This is going to prove to be a most interesting night for them." Heero said, setting the book aside as he saw his wife was ready for bed, and turned out the light.

~~~~*~~~~

part 8

SEVEN MONTHS LATER...

'How did I let Quatre talk me into this?' Trowa wandered through the halls of Quatre's estate as he followed a servant to Quatre's study. 'It had to be the pleading in his voice. I shouldn't have come. I KNOW I shouldn't have come. But I missed him so. I know he won't understand why I stayed away... if he did there's a possibility he'd hate me. I wouldn't blame him, because even I suspect my own motives for being here right now.'

Finally, they stopped at the doors to the study and Trowa was let in. Before he could look around to get his bearings he was greeted with an enthusiastic, "TROWA!", and seconds later grabbed up into a strong hug.

"I'm so glad your here!" Quatre exclaimed letting go. Trowa could swear the blond was on the verge of jumping up and down. He had to keep himself from letting the ends of his mouth turn up at the corners. "Come in and sit down."

Quatre walked ahead and sat back down at his desk. Trowa followed taking in eyefuls of architecture, and sat down across from him.

"You've had it redecorated...?" Trowa asked.

"Just repainted. I didn't care for the yellow walls much. So I chose a sort of nearly white blue." Quatre answered looking around the study.

"It's a nice change."

"Have they showed you your quarters yet?" Quatre asked.

Trowa looked back at his friend and had to keep from smiling. He was always so eager to please any of his guests, servants, or family who were staying with him.

"Yes, they're very..." How could he put this without making it sound too flowery? "... pleasant."

"I'm glad. You will stay a couple of days after the wedding, won't you?" Quatre asked hopeful.

"Maybe, but I planned to leave the next evening."

Quatre's face fell. "Well, your here for three days. So I guess we'll have to make the most of it. Desiree had to go out for the night. She's helping Sally. Then Heero and Relena and Wufei will both be coming here this evening to stay. Then the wedding is tomorrow, and finally we'll have= a whole day to catch up!" Quatre said in practically one long sentence.

"When will your wife return?" Trowa asked curiously.

"Tomorrow night." Quatre's brow creased when he noticed Trowa seemed to breathe a sigh of relief. "Are you okay?"

"Yes...just tired I think." Trowa glanced over at the picture on Quatre's desk. His breath escaped him briefly when it fell on Desiree's picture. He shut his eyes tight as emotions flooded all his senses.

"Are you sure? You looked flushed." Quatre said as he leaned forward and laid a cool hand on Trowa's forehead.

Trowa looked at him with eyes filled with pain.

"I'll be okay Quatre." He lied. He wasn't okay, he thought he could control it, but it hurt so much.

"What is it?" Quatre asked seeing through it.

Trowa cleared his throat and his expression of emotion. "Your wife?" He nodded at the picture.

Quatre looked at the picture and then picked up the frame to look at it closer. A dreamy eyed look came to him. "Yes. Photos hardly ever do her justice. She's so beautiful." Quatre ran a finger over the picture's glass, then looked up at Trowa. "She's Duo's sister you know."

"She is?" Trowa asked surprised.

"Yeah. They just found out when we were first engaged. You should have seen the look on Duo's face when he found out." Quatre said starting to giggle.

"I can imagine." Trowa said allowing a slight smile to come to his face.

Quatre looked back at the photo. "She's only been gone one day and I already miss her." Quatre said after a couple long moments.

Trowa had to keep himself from letting out the same wail his heart did. 'He loves her. He loves her with every ounce of his being. Oh God! I shouldn't have come yet. I shouldn't have come for a long time from now. But I can't go back. It might hurt him more. Surely, he knows. If he gets hurt it's my fault. I can't let that happen. what will he do when he finds out that I am the other man in his wife's heart? How can I keep him from getting hurt? She's better off with him... but as for now once all this comes out, someone is going to walk away from this hurt.'

He looked up into the face of the young blond who was engrossed in his wife's features. 'It has to be me who'll walk away alone. She belongs to him and her vow to him is forever definite. He can give her all the things I never could, and more important he'll be there when she cries. A promise I can't keep as a solider.

He doesn't know it but it was better when I wasn't here. But I suppose this meeting was inevitable. I just wish I wasn't the other man who stood in the way of your wife's heart being given to you. I'm sorry Quatre...I'm so sorry.

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