A Change of Pace
By Amber A.

Disclaimer: All the Buffy the Vampire Slayer characters aren’t mine. They belong to Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, and Fox. All the BtVS cast members belong to themselves. I’m just having fun. Don’t mean to offend anyone.

Part 1

Sarah Michelle Gellar and I, David Boreanaz were rehearsing the prom breakup scene. Joss Whedon was standing by and watching us perform with glee. He licked his lips greedily. In a moment Sarah and I would come to the part where Angel broke up with Buffy and say he was leaving town, thus freeing me up for my own series. But I was having second thoughts. I didn’t want to leave 'Buffy'. And I definitely didn’t want to breakup with Sarah onscreen, even if it was just part of the show. It was too real for me.

"Hey!" Joss yelled, frustrated. "Don’t act so lovey dovey, David! You’re about to rip Buffy’s heart out of her chest! Look depressed!"

I stopped speaking and stared at the little man. "I’m sorry, Joss." I said quietly. "I just don’t want to hurt Sarah’s feelings."
That was the wrong thing to say to the greedy producer.

"You’re not hurting Sarah’s feelings!" he yelled, throwing down the script. "You’re hurting *Buffy’s* feelings so you can

go to your own show!"
"Maybe I don’t want to go to my own show. Maybe I want to stay with Sarah." I replied defiantly.

Joss looked like he was about to burst a blood vessel. "And how long have you decided this?!" he screeched.

David shrugged nonchalantly. "A long time."

Joss breathed deeply a few times then replied. "But I’ve had you set up to get your own show ever since the end of the 2nd season!" he whined. "You can’t just suddenly decide that you want to stay on Buffy and screw Sarah whenever you feel like it!"

"I don’t screw Sarah!" I protested. "I’m married, remember?"

"Yeah, to your Irish social worker Ingrid." Joss said sarcastically. "You made her up so you could have a thing with Sarah and have it be private, remember? I swear, you are just so ridiculous sometimes, David. If I had a nickel for everytime you said you were married, I’d be twice as rich as I am right now!"

"Guys." Sarah interrupted.

We continued arguing.

"Guys!!" she yelled at the top of her lungs.

We stopped bitching and stared at her.

"You two seem to forget that I’m in the room and I don’t appreciate being treated like I don’t exist. Now if you boys will stop acting like little old ladies, we have a scene to rewrite."

Joss found his voice and sputtered, "Rewrite? Don’t you mean *rehearse*?"

"No, I mean *rewrite*. I don’t want him to leave either. I love him and I don’t want him to go to his own show. And if you don’t rewrite the prom scene-" she said warningly as Joss prepared to complain, "I’ll quit."

Joss’ jaw dropped. "What?"

"You heard me." She said to Joss. "Now, come on David, you and me are going to take a break." Sarah finished, walking over to me and taking my hand.

I followed Sarah, shrugging apologetically at Joss.

Sarah and I went to Sarah’s trailer and sat down on her bed.

"Sarah," I began.

She silenced me with a soft kiss on the lips. We kissed each other for a few minutes, until Sarah broke away to say breathlessly, "David, it’s okay. I don’t want you to leave Buffy either."

"Really?"

Sarah smiled slightly. "Yeah. If you go to your own show, we won’t see each other as much."

"Thanks, Sar. I was afraid that when I started ranting at Joss, you’d be pissed at me for interrupting the scene."
"How could I ever get mad at you?" she laughed. "I love you."

I felt a wave of nostalgia at her words of love. We’d always had a great friendship, but somewhere during the hiatus after season two, we’d gotten closer. I remember the first time I realized I loved her. We had just finished filming the last part of Becoming, Part Two and Sarah had been really broken up about it. She had become Buffy and sending Angel to Hell had been too realistic for her. I remembered that day with mixed feelings.

"Buffy?" I had asked her, tears running down my cheeks. "What’s going on?" I shook my head slowly and whispered, "Where are we? I don’t remember."

She stared at me in shock and asked doubtfully, "Angel?"

*Damn, she’s good*. I thought quietly to myself. I reached out and caressed her arm. "You’re hurt." She lowered the sword and stepped towards me. She hugged me tightly. "Oh God, I feel like I haven’t seen you in months. God, everything’s so muddled. Oh, Buffy. . ." I trailed off as Sarah kissed me desperately.

Behind us, the sound and special effects crews made the vortex open. That was my cue to break the kiss and ask her, "What’s happening?"

Sarah glanced at the vortex behind us and said reassuringly, "Shh. Don’t worry about it."

She then kissed me some more. Next we were supposed to exchange "I love yous" but the kiss was too nice. We finally broke apart and I heard her say, "I love you."

"I love you." I said sincerely, because I realized in that moment that I did love her.

She cried some more and whispered painfully, "Close your eyes."

I looked at her and she nodded slowly. I obediently closed my eyes.

Now here was the tricky part. She stabbed the sword right under me, but the special effects crew made it look like it went through me.

I felt myself being lifted by strings into the "vortex". I opened my eyes and stared at her in shock. "Buffy?" I asked, reaching my hand out towards her. The "vortex" began to suck me away, and as it did, she stepped back slowly. "Why?" I whispered. That wasn’t in the script, but I thought it would add more realism to the scene.

But it seemed to add too much realism. She started to cry more, which also wasn’t in the script. *Shit, I’ve overdone it.* I cursed inwardly.

I gave her one last look, and she stared at me sorrowfully in return. Then I was gone.

"And cut!" Joss shouted. He gave us a ten-minute break while they redid Sarah’s makeup and had her change clothes. She did everything in a daze, as if she was miles away. Once the crews were done fixing her up, I pulled her to one side.

"Sar?" I asked worriedly. "Ya okay?"

She burst into tears. "Oh, God David, it was so real." She sobbed. "I actually felt like I was sending you to hell."

"It’s okay." I soothed, reaching over to take her in my arms. "It wasn’t real. I’m right here."

Without even thinking, I kissed her on the lips. She responded eagerly, raining kisses all over my throat and face. We stood like that for awhile, just giving each other comfort. At last I pulled away to whisper into her ear, "Sarah, I think I’m falling in love with you."

She looked up at me and grinned. "How long did it take you to realize that?" she teased.

"About two seconds after I kissed you." I responded.

"Well, if it makes you feel any better." Sarah said coyly. Her next words were serious. "I’ve always loved you. You just never seemed to notice."

"Really?" I asked incredulously.

"Yeah." She smiled, leaning forward to kiss me again.

We went back to making out, only this time it wasn’t for comfort purposes; it was love. Joss called the end of the break. But Sarah and I didn’t notice. The rest of the world just seemed to disappear . . .

"David!" Sarah shouted, bringing me back to the present.

I looked down at her sheepishly. "Just thinking of the first time I heard you say ‘I love you.’" I grinned.

She brightened immediately and kissed me on my Adam’s apple. "I told you a thousand times on ‘Buffy’; you just never listened." She replied.

I gaped at her. "All the times on ‘Buffy’ when Buffy said, ‘I love you.’ you actually meant it?" I asked, shocked.

She nodded. "Yeah. Why do you think I sounded so sincere all the times I said it?"

I shrugged. "I don’t know. I just thought you were a really good actress. You already have an Emmy, so you must be good." I reminded her.

"Nope, I wasn’t acting." Sarah replied. "Now let’s stop talking about who fell in love when. We’ve got a scene to rewrite." She said as she pulled out a copy of The Prom script and a pen and thumbed through to the breakup scene.

"Angel, drop the cryptic. You’re scaring me." She recited.

I shook my head. "Let’s not go through the whole thing. Skip to right before Angel breaks up with Buffy. That’s where we have to change it."

She flipped a few pages and found the spot. "I want my life to be with you." She said desperately, getting into the script.

I readjusted my mood into the brooding Angel’s. "I don’t.

Sarah paused as she decided what she wanted to say. "You’re lying! You’re just trying to give me light. But what you don’t understand, Angel, is that you are my light." She finally said, writing in the new lines as she spoke.

"No, Buffy I’m darkness." I persisted, really letting myself go so I could become Angel.

"No you’re not!" she yelled, becoming Buffy. "And even if you are, I can help you become light! Our love can redeem you."

"No," I protested. "I only bring you pain. You’re better off without me."

"But you protect me." She said desperately. "How am I supposed to live without you with me to help me fight?"

"You can do it. You’re strong."

"Why does everyone think I’m so emotionally strong!" she yelled, frustrated. "I have physical strength, Angel, not emotional. If you go, I’ll die without you."

"You’ll survive without me. You’ve done it before." I objected.

"But that was before I found out about what goes bump in the night." Sarah said. "Ever since I’ve been the Slayer, I’ve had you. I don’t know how to do this without you by my side. Please stay with me." She pleaded.

"But I only bring you pain." I protested feebly, speaking so that Angel began to agree.

"You bring me more joy than pain." Sarah asserted, taking my hands and looking into my eyes. "Please don’t leave me here alone."

"Okay, Buffy. I’ll stay with you, if that’s what you want." I finally agreed, leaning forward to kiss Sarah as a means of touching reconciliation.

But it became more than that. She started to french me. I tried to pull away to tell her how perfect the new lines were, but I didn’t want to. So I just sat on the bed and kissed her. She shoved me down onto the bed and forced my shirt off. I complied by pulling her shirt off. For a moment I stopped kissing her to stare at her bra.

"Take it off." I said hoarsely.

She obeyed by slowly taking her bra off. She was teasing me. I grew so aroused that I just ripped her bra off but it was still intact. Her breasts were absolutely perfect. I caressed her nipples gently with my lips. She did the same to mine. We tore the rest of our clothes off and made love. It wasn’t just good; it was like something holy and serene that I never wanted to end. But we were interrupted by a loud bang on the door.

We quickly threw the sheets over our naked bodies. "Can you come back later?" Sarah called breathlessly.

A heavy sigh was heard on the opposite side. "Sar, David, get your clothes on. Joss is pissed." Nick Brendon said, exasperated. "And bring the new Prom scene with you." As he walked away I heard him mutter under his breath, "Geez, the way you two hide and pretend like you’re not madly in love with each other is just pathetic."

After he was gone, I looked at Sarah, confused. "How’d he know that I was in here with you?"

Sarah giggled. "I guess we haven’t been as private as we thought. What do you think of the new lines?"

"They’re perfect. Absolutely perfect. And so are you." I said, nuzzling my head in her hair and kissing her ear.

"David! Not right now! We have to get dressed and go see Joss."

I reluctantly stopped kissing her and got out of bed. "Where are my pants?" I asked, looking around the room.

She pointed to underneath a chair where my jeans lay. "Right there. Right where I threw them." Sarah said.

Part 2

After David and I had gotten dressed, we walked to Joss’ office where he was waiting.

He was sitting at his desk, calmly smoking a cigarette. "Ah, David, Sarah, here you are." He said nonchalantly as he motioned to two chairs in front of his desk. "Please take a seat."

We sat down and looked at him questionably. "Joss," I asked. "Are you okay? Nick told us you were mad."

"Oh, I am mad." He assured me tightly. "My two lead actors tell me right before we finish filming The Prom ep that they don’t want the characters to split up. Now what am I supposed to think of that? You guys have known for almost a year that I was going to give David his own series, and you also knew that in order to give him his own series, I was going to break the Buffy-Angel relationship off. But you didn’t say anything. Until now. Why?"

David looked at me and I shrugged. "We weren’t sure how we felt about each other until a few months after we filmed Becoming. We didn’t know that you planned to permanently end the B/A thing. How will the fans react?"

"They’ll love the new series so much that they won’t care about David breaking your heart!" Joss screeched.

I stared at him, disbelieving. "What are you talking about?"

Joss looked sheepish and tried to correct himself. "I meant Angel breaking up with Buffy."

But I wasn’t buying it. "No, no you didn’t. You said, ‘David breaking my heart!’ What’d you mean by that?"

Joss was caught. He sighed heavily and owned up. "I was going to try to break you up. It wouldn’t be good publicity if you guys were seen together. I’m trying to promote the Angel series. And I can’t do that if you’re seen hanging all over him, Sarah."

"Hang all over him?" I repeated. "I don’t hang all over David." Looking at David, I whispered, "Do I?"

He chuckled. "Of course not."

I turned back to Joss and spat out an angry retort. "What the hell were you thinking?! You can’t just break us up because you want to promote your damn show, which if David and I have anything to say about it will never premiere at all!" I yelled, throwing the revised Prom script at him with a flourish.

Joss picked it up and flipped to the breakup scene. He read the new lines with a casual interest until he came to the more serious parts.

When he was done, he looked at David and I doubtfully. "You guys actually wrote these yourself?" he asked skeptically.

"No, we acted them out and wrote them in as we went along." David replied.

Joss nodded thoughtfully. "Well, they’re very good." He said, giving me hope. But his next words brought me tumbling down to reality. "But I’m afraid they just don’t work for the way I have things planned."

"What are you saying, Joss? Just spit it out." David asked.

"I’m saying that I have it set up for David to go do his spin-off. And these lines," he said, tapping the script roughly. "Just don’t work if I want Angel to go to LA."

"What if the character Buffy doesn’t want Angel to go to LA?" I questioned. "What if she’ll be heartbroken without him? You’ve set their relationship up so that they need each other to exist, Joss. You’ve made everyone believe that they are soulmates and belong together always. You can’t just decide to break their relationship off. The audience won’t stand for it."

"Yeah." David agreed. "You can’t break em up like that."

"Would you listen to yourselves?" Joss screamed. "You’re talking about Buffy and Angel like they’re actual people!"

"If we’re doing that, it’s only because we want to convince you to keep them together!" I shot back.

"You mean keep *us* together!" Joss retorted. "You only want to keep Buffy and Angel together because you want to be able to suck face whenever you want to!"

"So what if we do?" David asked hotly. "The fans haven’t been complaining. They love the turbulence and romance of the B/A relationship."

Joss mulled that over for a little bit, then came to a decision. "Alright." He said extremely reluctantly. "We’ll reshoot the breakup scene and I’ll cancel the spin-off."

"Yes!" I shouted, thrilled, as I leaped out of the chair and into David’s waiting arms.

"But if this is gonna work, guys," Joss warned. "You’ll have to help come up with ideas. Part of the reason I wanted to split them up was because our writers are running out of ideas."

"Don’t worry about that!" I said playfully. "We can help the writers out."

"Okay, kids. Now get out of here. I’ve got alot of explaining to do. I’ll join you in about half an hour to reshoot the. . ." he trailed off. He shrugged and said, "I guess we can’t call it breakup scene, can we?"

"I guess not!" David replied. "See you later!"

He lifted me up into his arms and started towards the door.

"Hey, kids!" Joss called as he picked up the phone and started to dial. David paused halfway out the door. "Get married or something!" he continued. "If you’ve managed to convince to grouchy producer that you love each other enough that you want to work together for as long as the series lasts, then you’ve got something special!"

"Whatever you say, boss!" I called cheerfully as David carried me away.

"Married, huh?" I teased as David plopped down on a bench someone had set up near one of the sets. "What do you think about that idea, Mr. Boreanaz?" I continued playfully.

"That’d be just be swell, Ms. Gellar." David said in a country accent. "But I don’t think you could stand your hubby’s tickling abilities!" he said, reverting to his normal tone of voice as he tickled me unmercifully.

"Ah! David! Stop!" I squealed, scooting away from him and giggling. "David! I’m gonna fall off the- whoa!" I was cut off as I tumbled off the bench and onto the ground.

He fell on top of me. I shoved him off and yelled, "Be careful, you big lug!"

He rolled over and faced me. We were all dirty and sweaty, but he thought of me first. "Ya okay, Sarah?"

"Do I look okay?" I said, pretending to be angry. "I’ve just had a battle of words with a horrible producer, then you repay my brilliance by tickling me to death and now you have the nerve to ask if I’m okay?!"

David came to me and tried to stroke my hair. I slapped his hand away, still teasing him. But he didn’t know that. "I’m sorry, Sarah. I was just having some fun."

My fun was over. "David, you are so gullible!" I laughed. "I was just teasing you! Now come on, let’s go see the rest of the cast and tell em what’s going on! Race you there!"

I got up, brushed myself off and ran to the lounge where Aly, Nick, Seth, and Charisma were chilling.

"Hey guys!" I yelled brightly. I turned and saw David right behind me.

"Hi, Sarah. Hi, David." They said in unison.

Aly looked at me curiously. "Why so cheerful, Sarah?"

"David’s staying on Buffy!" I exclaimed. "Joss will reshoot the breakup scene if David and I-"

"Help out with writing new story ideas." David chimed in.

I looked at him affectionately. "Exactly!"

"So does this mean I don’t get to be on Angel?" Charisma whined.

"Yeah, but you get to stay on Buffy, Charisma!" Nick tried to console her.

"Oh, I guess you’re right, Nick." Charisma agreed. She brightened as she said, "I guess I want to stay on Buffy! I would been driven insane if I’d had to be around David being a brooding vampire who’s pining away for Buffy."

"That’s the spirit, Charisma!" Seth said.

"Yeah, you guys have got the right attitude!" I proclaimed, squeezing David’s hand tightly. I bounced up and looked around the room gleefully. "Let’s go bug Joss to reshoot the Prom ep and change the course of the third season!"

We got up and strolled to the set where the sewers scene was set up.

"But, Sarah, how are we going to do that?" Aly asked as we walked. "Joss has had it set up to break up Buffy and Angel up for the whole season. How are we going to undo all that in just a few episodes?"

"Joss will think of something." I said confidently. "If he doesn’t, I’m quitting."

"What?!" Nick asked incredulously. "You’d quit the show and put us all out of work just because David was gonna have his own series?! You’ve got to be joking."

"No, I wasn’t joking, Nick." I responded evenly. "But since Joss has decided to cancel the new series, I won’t quit."

I stopped talking when I noticed Joss walking towards us.

"Hi, guys." He said resignedly. "Sarah’s ordered me to the keep whole Buffy Angel thing alive or she-"

"Quits." Nick finished sarcastically. "We know."

"So let’s finish the Prom ep." Joss continued, unperturbed. "Sarah, David come with me. The rest of you can watch if you’re quiet."

Part 3

Thirty minutes later, Sarah and I were back in the sewers set, waiting for Joss to give the word to start shooting. We were kept waiting because he was rereading the new lines.

"Hmm," he finally said after a long pause. "These are great except for the part where you mention him leaving you. That doesn’t fit in with the whole script unless you add in Angel telling Buffy he’s leaving right before you start the whole ‘You’re lying!’ thing. How about we still have the ‘How am I supposed to stay away from you?’ question in there somewhere or delete the part where Buffy says,

‘Don’t leave me.’?"

"Sounds good." I shrugged.

"Well, I need one of you to tell me where to put that in. ‘Cause as I’m rereading it, I don’t know where I can fit that."

I strolled over and reread the scene. "You’re right. What do you think we should do, Sarah?" I asked.

She came to stand beside me and also reread the scene. "We should have Buffy say what was originally there, you know the part after where Angel says he doesn’t want to be with her. So it should read like this: It should run through the way it was first supposed to be until we get to Buffy saying, ‘Is this really happening?’. Right before that we should insert the new scene. She’ll get a burst of anger or something to try to keep Angel with her. It’ll make the scene twice as long, but we’re gonna omit the Willow-Buffy crying scene since we won’t need it. So The Prom ep should still be an hour long. You can decide yourself how you want to change the actual prom." She finished with a flourish.

Joss nodded. "That should work. I’ll get Marti to redo the rest of the season. She’s one of our best writers." He wiped a hand through his hair nervously. "Well, action!"

We went to our places and started speaking.

"Heart? You have a heart? It isn't even beating." Sarah said angrily.

I waited a minute then I whispered painfully, "Don't."

"Don't what? Don't love you? I'm sorry. You know what? I didn't know that I got a choice in that. I'm never gonna change. I can't change. I want my life to be with you." Sarah burst in, her tone desperate, pleading.

I waited for what seemed like an eternity then I simply whispered calmly, "I don't."

"You don’t want to be with me?" she said doubtfully, staring at me with pain evident in her eyes. I had to force myself not to look away.

"I can’t believe you’re breaking up with me."

I tried to reassure Sarah that I still loved her with, "It doesn’t mean that I don’t..."

She turned away, barely able to hold back the tears. *Come on, Sarah.* I thought anxiously. *Don’t get too into the role.* I nervously recalled what had happened after Becoming.

While I’d been thinking, she’d turned back around to face me and said tearfully, "How am I supposed to stay away from you?"

"I'm leaving. After the Ascension. After it's finished with the Mayor and Faith. If we survive, I'll go." I said seriously, careful not to display any of the raging emotions within me in my voice.

"Where?" Her voice was a mere echo of what it usually was.

"I don’t know."

She half-turned as if to gather strength. "You’re just trying to give me light." She said distantly. Suddenly she whirled around and startled me when I saw the fiery desperation in her beautiful hazel eyes. She chuckled bitterly. "But what you don’t understand, Angel, is that you are my light."

"No, Buffy I- I’m darkness. I’ll always be darkness."

"No you’re not! And even if you are, I can help you become light! Our love can redeem you." Her voice cracked as she whispered softly so that I could scarcely hear it, "*My* love can redeem you."

"No," I protested bitterly, pretending to be near tears so I could give the scene a nice touch. It wasn’t that hard to pretend. "I only bring you pain. You’re better off without me."

"But you protect me." She said desperately, almost shouting. "How am I supposed to live without you with me to help me fight?"

"You can do it. You’re strong." I protested.

"Why does everyone think I’m so emotionally strong!" she yelled, frustrated. "I have physical strength, Angel, not emotional. If you go, I’ll die without you."

"You’ll survive without me. You’ve done it before." I objected.

"But that was before I found out about what goes bump in the night." Sarah said. "Ever since I’ve been the Slayer, I’ve had you. I don’t know how to do this without you by my side. Please stay with me." She pleaded.

"But I only bring you pain." I repeated feebly, speaking so that Angel began to agree.

"You bring me more joy than pain." Sarah asserted, taking my hands and looking into my eyes. "Please don’t leave me here alone." She pleaded, crying.

"Okay, Buffy. I’ll stay with you, if that’s what you want." I finally agreed. I leaned over and wrapped her in a tight embrace. We kissed for what seemed like an eternity, unmoving.

Around us, there was silence.

At last, I heard Joss whisper, "Cut. Have it fade out to a commercial when we shoot it for real."

I released Sarah and glanced at Joss. "We don’t need to reshoot it?" I asked, confused. "It’s fine the first time through?"

Joss seemed to acknowledge my presence for the first time and warmly came to greet us. "That was absolutely perfect! Sarah, how do you do it?"

"I just suspend my belief so I can become the character." Sarah grinned, shrugging.

But Joss was beyond hearing. "I mean wow!" he said cheerfully. "You guys had me actually sucked into the scene, and I’m the one who produces the damn show!"

"Well, coming from you, Joss that’s quite a compliment." Sarah said dryly with a hint of sarcasm.

"Yes, well. Guys, you’re just terrific!" he gushed. A second later he was all seriousness. "Aly, Nick, Seth, Charisma, go get changed into your prom clothes." He barked. "When you’re done doing that, stop by the writers office and help rewrite the rest of the season. And after you’re done doing that, pick up Sarah and David and go party!"

When they were gone, Joss turned back to us. "As for you two, you should really go celebrate for being able to change my view point so quickly. Now scat!"

"Yes, sir." I replied, grinning.

We exited the set and walked to a lush shady green park that was right across the street from the production area.
I plopped down on a green bench that was underneath a tree and Sarah joined me, comfortably settling her head on my shoulder.
It was twilight, and stars were just beginning to pop out. I gazed up the sky in awe. The night seemed to swallow me whole. It was all around me.

"Wow." I said. "It’s so beautiful."

"Yeah." Sarah softly agreed.

I put my hand in my pocket and gently fingered the thing that lay there.

On my shoulder, Sarah was yawning.

"Sarah?" I asked softly, rocking her slightly.

"Hmm?"

"Can I ask you something?"

She looked up into my eyes and said, "What is it, David? You sound funny."

"I was wondering if you- well maybe if it’s not too much trouble-"

She chuckled, which caused her to wake up. "Spit it out, honey."

"Will you marry me?" I whispered cautiously, looking into her eyes nervously.

Sarah gasped sharply and asked, "Oh my God, David are you sure?"

"I am more sure of this than I have been of anything ever." I said honestly. "I love you. Will you marry me?"

"Do you even have to ask?" Sarah said.

I tilted my head to kiss her. It was a serene, hopeful kiss, full of passion, adventure, and a new beginning. And, as it always did when I kissed Sarah, the rest of the world just faded away.

The End