"Bessie, you can't be serious! You'll never be able to find Joey *or* Pacey in this weather. They couldn't have gone far-the best thing to do is to just wait it out, okay? They're probably fine-you shouldn't risk your own health by going after them. It's pointless. The negative outweighs the positive." Bessie looks at him, her face wrenched with anger.
"That is my little sister out there! In the middle of a huge thunderstorm! With the creek overflowing! There is no way in *hell* that I am going to sit here!"
She runs to the door and bolts outside before Bodie even has a chance to grab her arm. He looks defeated and turns to Dawson and Jen.
"Well, this means I now have to go after her," he sighs and takes his own coat from the rack. "You two do *not* leave under *any* circumstances, got it?" Both of the teens nod as Bodie takes a deep breath and opens the door. "Good thing Alex is at the sitter's," he mutters and storms off into the pouring rain. Dawson turns his attention back to looking out the window. Nervously, he grinds his teeth. Jen walks over to him and gingerly sets her hand on his arm. He doesn't even notice.
"I have to go after her," Dawson suddenly states and turns around, heading for the door. Jen frantically tries to grab his arm like Bodie did to Bessie, except she succeeds. Dawson looks at her, fire burning in his eyes.
"Dawson, you heard Bodie. We have to stay here. Going out after Joey *now* isn't going to help any way. I'm sure Pacey is with her and they're fine, okay?" Dawson looks at her for a second, then sits down at the counter angrily.
"I can't stand this. I am the biggest idiot on the planet. If anything happens to her..." Jen sits down next to him cautiously. He buries his head in his hands. "Jen, this is all my fault. If she gets hurt...or..." Jen sets her hand on his shoulder comfortingly.
"I'm sure they're okay, Dawson. This isn't your fault. Joey's the one who ran out into the storm..."
"Yeah, but it was because of something stupid I said...why don't I ever realize what's going on until it's too late?" He looks at Jen, hoping for an answer of some kind.
"What did you say to her any way?"
"I didn't say it *to* her...of, forget it, it doesn't matter now anyway...Jen, I can't live without Joey as my best friend, you know that. If anything happens to her out there I'll *never* forgive myself."
"Dawson.."
"When we were 8 years old, me and Joey were swimming in Pacey's swimming pool...and she jumped off the diving board into the deep end and she... just...didn't come up..." Jen starts to say something but Dawson shakes his head sadly. "Her dad was there and he jumped in...and my parents had run off to call an ambulance. Mrs. Potter just started to cry-I'd never seen her cry before-as her dad tried to get her to breathe and me and Pacey just had to stand there, and stay out of the way. It was so *horrible*, Jen...I wanted to save her but I didn't know how... and all these thoughts were running through my mind..."What if she dies...what if her can't get her to breathe...Joey can't die, she just can't die-I can't live without her..." When the ambulance came, she was already breathing again...but I vowed right then and there that I would protect her from anything and anything cause I couldn't lose her, not then, not ever..."
"Dawson, it's just a rainstorm. She'll be okay...so will Pacey..." Dawson looks at Jen.
"Will they be okay? You saw the news, Jen. This is *serious*. It's not an "april shower". People aren't supposed to be out in cars, and certainly they're not supposed to be out running around in this either!" Jen just sighs, not knowing any way to convince Dawson everything will be fine, since she's not all-together sure that it will be.
"Let's just hope that Bessie finds her..." Jen says quietly. Dawson anxiously runs his hands through his hair and gets up, walking towards the window.
"It's funny...the one thing that I should've protected her from I didn't..." he whispers as the rain becomes blur in his eyes. Jen looks at him, confused.
"What didn't you protect her from?"
"Myself," Dawson answers simply, glancing at Jen. She stares at him as he again focuses on the weather, his heart heavy with pain and worry.
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