| Welcome to
Advanced Dungeons & Dragons The Humor... AD&D.com |
Every campaign needs a bit of humor. So does each webpage. Even though this humor is no exactly AD&D-related, it still is funny because it relates to the Internet; it is my satire on the Internet if you will, following the stlye of the almost immortal Dave Barry, whose weekly syndycated column I have not missed for a very long time. So, enjoy what I wrote, I have another one coming sometime later. |
| You think you can go anywhere on the web now, don't you?
There are links on every page and search engines to find what you can't
link to. But that's the web bills itself as, a user friendly, free environment.
But not so. Everywhere you look, there's an advertisement, a little electronic
billboard
drawing your attention to it. Imagine, if you used cars to "drive" the web instead of surfboards to surf it, these little billboard would distract you and you would rear-end the driver in front of you. Q: Can't the government regulate the speed of the cars, thus preventing fatal rear-endings? A: Yes it can. Q: Then why doesn't it? A: Because we don't use cars to drive the web, we surf it using sharp edged surfboards. Q: Don't these dangerous surfboards cause any fatal accidents? A: No. Q: Why not? A: Because we don't really use surfboards to surf the net. Surfboards are really euphanisms for browsers. Q: Can't the government regulate the browsers? A: Yes it can. Q: Then why doesn't it? A: Because the browsers have not caused any proven fatalities. But they have made people disappear into the cyberspace void. Q: What's the cyberspace void? A: Its where one sock from each pair put in the dryer goes. Q: I thought they were eaten by the monster under the dryer. A: That's a common misconception. Its really the fault of the cyberspace void. Q: How does it come into my house to eat the socks? A: Throught the Internet. Q: What if I don't have access to the Internet? A: Your socks are eaten by the monster under the dryer. Q: What if I don't feed it enough socks? A: It will go hungry and I suggest you feed it more socks unless you want to begin losing one leg off each pair of pants. Q: Can the cyberspace void hurt me? A: No. Q: Then why did you say it can abduct people? A: Abduction doesn't hurt. Q: Does the cyberspace void ever eat the files I send and recieve over the internet? A: Yes. But only when it runs out of socks to eat. |