KINDERGARTEN TEACHER:
To get to the other side.
PLATO:
For the greater good.
ARISTOTLE:
It is the nature of chickens to cross roads.
KARL MARX:
It was a historical inevitability.
SADDAM HUSSEIN:
This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified indropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.
JACK NICHOLSON:
Cause it fucking wanted to. That's the fucking reason.
RONALD REAGAN:
I forget.
CAPTAIN JAMES T. KIRK:
To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.
CAESAR:
It came, it saw, it crossed.
DARWIN:
It was the logical next step after coming down from the trees.
SIR ISAAC NEWTON:
Chickens at rest tend to stay at rest. Chickens in motion tend tocross the road.
ALBERT EINSTEIN:
Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road crossed the chickendepends on your frame of reference.
SHERLOCK HOLMES:
It crossed the road because it was going to catch a train at VictoriaStation at 3:15, to Edinburgh. And how did I know that? Observe, Watson,the patina of dust on the chicken's feathers, which indicates that it hadbeen spending time in a library, reading about Scotland. And observe alsothat it was humming "Bonnie Lassie" as it waited to cross. Finally, andmost important, observe the train ticket marked Edinburgh, stuffed under one wing, and the fact that Victoria station was where the chicken crossed the street, and finally that the only train to Edinburgh thisafternoon is the 3:15....
NEIL ARMSTRONG:
One small step for chickenkind, one giant leap for poultry.
THE CHICKEN:
I am crossing the road to block traffic as a protest against ... (thump).
CALCULUS LECTURER:
The road, if expressed in the form (y2-y1)/(x2-x1) is approximate forcases where lim(y2-y1)/(x2-x1) as (x2-x1) -> 0, is represented by thederivative, or rate of change, of the road with respect to the chicken,such that the value of the chicken may be assumed equal to the value of(y2-y1)/(x2-x1), for small values of roads.
Tang Liang Hong:
The chicken crossed the road because it was runningfor it's life from a gang of vultures.
Philip Yeo:
The chickens have a MORAL responsibility to cross theroad. If they don't, we'll name them.
Machiavelli:
The point is that the chicken crossed the road. Who cares why ?? The end of the crossing justifies whatever the motive there was.
Lee Kuan Yew:
Every chicken should be given the opportunity to realise itsfull potential to cross the road. The brightest chickens should lead.
Deng Xiao Ping:
A chicken that crosses the road is a good chickenregardless of whether it is a black or white chicken.
Bill Gates:
I have just released the new Chicken2000 Office which will notonly cross the roads but lay eggs, file your documents and balance your check book.
Mahatma Gandhi:
It's a non-violent way for the chickens to gainfreedom and independence.
Dr Richard Hu:
DON'T PANIC. We'll monitor the situation and startworrying if the chickens get run down while crossing the road.
Admiral Teo Chee Hean:
We'll teach the chickens to think for themselves,how to cross the road in the most effective way.
Mah Bow Tan:
The chickens must pay before they use the roads.
BG George Yeo:
In this age of information and technology, it is inevitablethat the chickens get to cross the road.
Sim Weng Hoo:
Don't give up if at first you fail. The chickens shouldthink of creative ways to cross the road.
Lee Kong Chian:
The chicken crossed the road because there are plenty ofworms on the other side and it should help as many chickens aspossible to cross the road.
Tao:
It doesn't matter if the chickens crossed the road or not. Whatmatters is that the chicken realised why the road is there in the first place.
Buddha:
The chicken should cultivate good karma so that it can crossto the other side of the road safely. If it gets run down, this is dueto bad karma and should try again in the next reincarnation.
Bill Clinton:
I've met so many chicks. I can't remember.
Mahathir:
We should let our own ethnic chickens which are slower cross the road first.
Einstein:
Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road moved beneath the chicken depends on your point of reference.
Darwin:
Chickens over great periods of time have been naturally selectedin such a way that they are genetically disposed to cross the roads.
Shakespeare:
All the world's a stage for the chickens to cross the road.
<<Back/Home