"OHOHOHOHOHO!"

A chilling sound indeed.

Kodachi laughed manically as she hopped from roof to roof, her newest creation in a package in her hand. "Soon, you will be mine!"

***

Ryouga was lost. This was nothing new. Suddenly he spotted a familiar figure. Of course, Ryouga not being the swiftest of the Ranma cast, he put 2 and 2 together... and got 9. "Hey, Ukyou! Whatcha doing in Nagasaki?"

***

Ukyou sighed as she shooed the last customer out, going outside to take down the Ucchan's sign for the night. She stood outside for a minute, enjoying the sight of the deepening sky and the feeling of peace that washed over her and let herself indulge in a familiar daydream of being married to Ranma in the future.

She knew as soon as she returned inside that she would have to clean, to count up the day's profit and subtract living expenses; discourage Konatsu's attentions and try and get undressed and into bed without anything negative happening. For now, though, she could close her eyes and imagine their children...

"Hey, Ukyou-" She heard someone start, and then a chilling sound. "OHOHOHOHO!"

***

Kodachi was so caught up in her daydreams she didn't see the okonomiaki chef until it was too late. They collided, the package exploding. Kodachi had enough sense not to breathe in the powder that erupted into the air, but the okonomiaki chef wasn't so lucky. Choking on the powder, she blacked out.

***

When she woke up, someone was calling her name. "Ukyou! Ukyou!"

Ukyou blinked awake, her vision clearing to reveal a familiar face. It took mere seconds for Kodachi's concotion to take effect.

"RYO-CHAN!" *GLOMP*

"Eep!" Suddenly a soft female body was in very close proximity to his own, a female body that wasn't Ranma's.

It was Ryouga's turn to black out, blood fountaining from his nose.

***

"Did you hear something, Akane?" Ranma asked suddenly. They were in a rare state of not fighting, both on the sofa, doing schoolwork. Or at least, Akane was doing schoolwork.Ranma was reading manga.

Akane looked up, startled. "Oh shoot! I was in the middle of an equation. What is it, Ranma?"

"Nothin', nevermind."

*Wham* Ranma became a vaguely Ranma-shaped pancake. He peeled himself off the floor, glaring at his fiancee. "Hey, I didn't do nothin'! Violent tomboy!"

"Baka," Akane stuck out her tongue. "You made me mess up my homework! now I have to start all over!"

"Well at least I have more of a life than school!"

"Yeah, like what? Dates with Shampoo?" Akane's eye was beginning to twitch slightly.

Ranma, not the brightest guy, decided to goad her further. "She's not bad looking, actually..."

"RAAAAAANNNNNMMMMAAAA..." Akane was beginning to glow. She raised her mallet threateningly. She was interrupted when someone crashed through the wall. Again.

"Waaaaaaah! How are we going to find the money to repair that?!" Soun wailed, coming into the room from nowhere and leaving again.

"Oh, grow up, Daddy," Nabiki's voice could be heard.

Ranma and Akane were too busy staring at the sight that greeted them:

Ryouga, a panicked expression on his face, running away from an amorous Ukyou, who had let down her hair, unbound her breasts and had put on a DRESS, of all things. "Come BACK, Ryouga honey!" She called after him. "Why are you running away from me? I love you!" They ran through the remaining walls and out of the house.

Ranma, one big ego, got a strange expression on his face. "Ukyou...loves...him...and...not...me???"

Akane began to glow again. "Fine!" She yelled, malleting him in the direction that Ukyou and Ryouga had gone. "Follow her then!"

Slipping her mallet back into hammerspace TM, Akane dusted her hands off and stomped upstairs to her room.

***

*Thunk*

Ranma landed on Ukyou, knocking them both out. Ryouga stopped running and looked back, to see her on the ground unconcious, his rival on top of her, also unconcious.

"Ukyou!" He rushed to her side, shoving Ranma off of her and pulling her into his arms. "I'm so sorry...you were such a good friend...even though you were always mean to me I'll miss you....*sob*" Ryouga went into full wail, tears streaming down his face.

Ukyou blinked. "Ry-Ryouga?"

"You're awake! I thought you were dead! I was so scared, Ukyou! Who would help me get Ak-"

*GLOMP*

"Oh, Ryouga honey! You were WORRIED about me! I KNEW it! You DO love me!"

"No, no, that's not what I meant! Ack! Get offa me!"

Ranma chose that moment to moan and get up, rubbing his head. "Uncute tomboy," he muttered. Then he spotted Ryouga, trying in vain to get released from Ukyou's sucker-like embrace and laughed. "Pig boy's got female problems!"

"SHUT UP, Ranma! Help me out here, okay?" Ryouga said through gritted teeth. Ranma took his time getting over there to knock Ukyou out.

Ryouga caught her as she crumpled.

"Let's get her to Tofu, okay? He'll be able to figure out what's wrong with her."

"Are you saying there has to be something WRONG with her to fall for me?? RAAANNNMMMAAA!!!"

"Yeah, maybe," Ranma laughed and leaped out of reach of Ryouga. "But seriously, bacon-breath, this is more Shampoo like behavior than how she usually acts...come ON, can you honestly say she's normally like this?"

"Well, no..."

"Right. Now let's get her to Tofu's. I can carry her, if you want."

"No!" Ryouga had a strange expression on his face. He pulled Ukyou closer and stood. "I-I'll carry her."

***

"Yup, there's defininitly something wrong here," Tofu observed, straightening his glasses.

"What does she have?" Ranma asked impatiently. "Why's she suddenly all over the pig, here?"

"Shut up, Ranma!" Ryouga glowered at the other boy.

Tofu cleared his throat. "I'm not exactly sure. Did she eat anything from the Nekohatan in the past couple of days?"

"Of course! Shampoo! Why would they give anything to Ukyou?" Ranma wondered aloud.

"I don't know," Ryouga said simply.

"Hmm....did she have any accidents? A fall, maybe?"

"No, wait-" Ryouga stopped and thought for a minute. "There WAS that run-in with Kodachi earlier today...."

"Tell me what happened." Tofu leaned closer, face intent.

"Kodachi was running with something," Ryouga began. "She slammed into Ucchan, and-"

"Ucchan?" Ranma wondered aloud. Ryouga blushed. "U-Ukyou."

"Go on." Tofu prodded.

"Well, there was this big cloud of something, a bluish grey powder, and Uch-Ukyou collapsed. By the time I could get to her, the cloud had disappeared, leaving Ukyou uncouncious and Kodachi missing."

"She ran home, you idiot."

"Don't call me an idiot, Ranma!"

Tofu held up his hands. "Back to the girl, here."

"So, do you know what's wrong?" Ryouga asked eagerly.

Tofu shook his head and both boys' faces fell. "But-" he said quickly, "I CAN make a pretty good guess, if you want to hear it. My suspicion is that that powder was for you, Ranma. Ukyou's collision with Kodachi only did to her what would have happened to you."

"Then why'd she fall for Ryouga and not Kodachi?"

"These potions and things can only work with a base emotion."

"What's that mean?" Ryouga scratched his head in puzzlement.

"It means that she had to have some sort of feelings for you, Ryouga. All they do is intensify what's already there and remove inhibitions. The good news is, though, that the effects wear off after a few days."

Ryouga sat back down heavily. His mind was whirling with the possibilities. "you mean- you mean-"

"She couldn't have liked pig boy! She's in love with me!"

Ryouga was too involved in his thoughts to hear Ranma talking. <<She had feelings for me. She had feelings for me!>>

Ukyou sat up at that moment, her eyes scanning the room. "Ryochan? Ryochan!"

"Right there." Ranma pointed at Ryouga, a smirk on his face.

Ukyou smiled cutely at Ranma. "Thanks."

"Ryouga honey!" *GLOMP*

Tofu's words were finally sinking into Ryouga's rather thick skull. "A few DAYS???"

***

"Are you hungry, honey?" Ukyou asked Ryouga, fluttering her eyelashes at him.

"No, I'm not hungry, Ukyou! I ALREADY ate 6 okonomiakis."

"You're a growing boy!"

Ryouga groaned. For the first time he could remember, he actually hoped Ranma, Kuno, Shampoo or one of the havoc-wreaking Nerima regulars would show up.

"Is there something wrong with my cooking?"

"No, no," He hurried to reassure her, "It's just that I- I mean, it's-"

"It's me, isn't it!" She wailed, sudden tears springing to her eyes. "You don't find me attractive!"

"A- erg- um-" Shoot, she was crying. What the hell am I supposed to do now??

"I was right! You don't like me! WAAAAAAAAHHHH!" She ran away sobbing. Ryouga sighed and let his head rest on his hands, too exhausted to think. Well, at least she won't be bugging me for a little while.

Mentally and emotionally exhausted, he fell asleep.

***

"Ryouga..." Someone was calling him, someone female.

"A-akane?" Half awake, Ryouga stood and stumbled to the source of the voice.

"Come here, Ryouga-chan..."

After a few wrong turns, he made it and stretched, yawning and rubbing his eyes. As soon as he could see, he gaped, blinking in shock.

"U-Ukyou?"

Clad in a really short, slinky black dress that revealed all, hair up in a bun, wearing makeup that made her appear dark and seductive, Ukyou took her time approaching him. "Hi, honey..."

Faced with a noseful of cleavage, Ryouga did what he does best at times like these: passed out, a fountain of blood erupting from his nose.

***

When he woke up, he was on his back. Blinking awake, he sat up and looked around. The room was dark; the only light provided were from twenty or more candles placed at strategic locations around the room.

The bed had been laid with black silk sheets which shimmered slightly in the candlelight. A bottle of champagne was sitting on the nightstand, two wineglasses placed near it. Suddenly, Ryouga realized he wasn't alone. He turned to look at Ukyou, sitting nest to him on the bed.

She flung herself into his arms, crying again. "WAAAAAAAHHHH! I thought I'd killed you! I thought I'd never see you again!"

Awkward, he patted her on the back. "Um- it's okay, really."

"No it's not! You could be dead!"

"Really, it takes more than that to kill me." Ryouga grinned despite himself, the corners of his mouth lifting to reveal his fangs.

Without warning, she lunged forward, knocking him over with the force of her exuberance, and pressed her lips to his.

Ryouga's first kiss.

It took a minute for him to realize he was being kissed at all, another to realize he was enjoying it. Not sure what he was doing, he cupped the back of her head in his hands, pressing her lips more firmly to his. She responded with enthusiasm, wrapping her arms around his shoulders and pulling him closer, running her tongue along his lips.

That's when he felt the change in her.

Suddenly, she broke the kiss.

Ryouga pulled her back. Now that he was being kissed, he didn't want that experience to end!

She kissed back for a second, then realized who she was kissing and shoved him away with both hands. "WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING, YA JACKASS?"

"I- ah- you were-" He had a look on his face that was usually reserved for Akane.

Ukyou softened for a second, looking into his eyes....why hadn't she realized before how cute he really was?....then she came to her senses.

"YOU PERVERT! I'M ENGAGED!"

Whipping out her giant megaspatula of doom, she punted the lost boy into orbit. It was only then that she looked down at herself and then around the room, a look of genuine shock on her face. "What the...??!"

Ryouga crashed into the Tendo's dining room as they were sitting down for dinner, landing just left of Akane and started bawling.

"Oh my," Kasumi stated finally, breaking the silence. "Won't you stay for dinner, Ryouga?"

He rubbed his head, and sniffed, suddenlt realizing where he was. "Sure, Kasumi." He sounded resigned.

Hmmm....Ryouga getting punted into orbit...it could only mean one thing, Ranma decided.

"Ukyou's back!"

"Whaddya mean, she's back?"

"Just that! She couldn't stay in love with you without some magic potion or somethin', P-chan."

"Who are you calling P-chan??"

"Who do you think, pig-boy?"

"DONT call me that!"

Yet another fight erupted and Kasumi sighed as her hard work exploded in dish fragments and food splattered all over everything.

"Raaaaannnnmmmmaaaaaa!" Akane was beginning to glow blue.

Uh-oh, Ranma thought, holding off Ryouga with a foot in the face.

"Stop picking on Ryouga!" *BAM* *BAM* *BAM*

"Ryouga!" The lost boy cringed. "Stop encouraging Ranma!"

"A-Akane-san?"

*BAM* *BAM*

Utterly incensed, Akane stormed off to her room, leaving the two unconcious martial artists on the floor.

"Oh my," Kasumi commented with her usual vacant smile. "They get along so well!"

***

In another part of Nerima, an okonomiaki chef stared gloomily out a window, wondering what to make of her life.

"Oh well," she said brightly, turning away from the window. "I think I'll go make some okonomiaki!"

***

And so another day in Nerima ended.