A Yuu Yuu Hakushou fanfic
by Cresent Star
Disclaimer: All Yuu Yuu Hakusho characters belong to Yoshihiro Togashi. I don't know exactly who owns Duo Maxwell of Gundam Wing EW, but I hope that person is kind and magnanimous and willing to forgive this poor (literally) otaku.
Ps. **.....** represents a thought, or monologue.
[In a small dark room illuminated by a single lamp, a braided young man brooded.]
Duo: **That facts stood for themselves. Urameshi Yuusuke was dead again and there were several parties looking mighty guilty. Kuwabara Kazuma, best friend... or was he? Kurama, aka Minamino Shuuichi, fellow team mate, trusted and loyal... but that was to be proven. Hiei, the hot tempered Forbidden Child who could kill on a whim. So who was it? It is up to I, Duo Maxwell, to find out THE TRUTH!
I turned the hot light on the orange haired punk. He was sweating like a coney dog in summer.** Tell me Kuwabara Kazuma, DID YOU KILL URAMESHI YUUSUKE???
Kuwabara: I have no reason to! Besides, why would I kill my own friend?!
Duo: I hear he's been your long time rival. With him out of the way, you'd be the top terror at Sarayashiki High. A quick shot to the head and he wouln't even have time to fire the Rei Gun. Simple as that. As a matter of fact, you were found to be drunk in the vicinity of the murder scene at the time of the crime.
Kuwabara: That was a coincidence! I was with Yukina! Ask her! I think he's a real stinker sometimes, but I wouldn't kill him for it! Honest!
Duo: Really...? Yukina? I'll have to check on that. Anyway, you could just be a very good liar, that's all. Look what we found in your room. **I threw suspected murder weapon on the table. A 3.8 Smith and Wesson.**
Kuwabara: I... uhh... hey... That's not mine! I've never seen it before!
Duo: Then what was it doing in your house???
Kuwabara: Er... some one must have planted it! Anyway, I have my rights! I, the Great Kuwabara Kazuma shall not be subject to such insolence!
Duo: This ain't a tournament buddy. This is the LAW. I am questioning you, therefore you have not right to remain silent.
Kuwabara: I didn't do it! It wasn't me I tell you! Some one is trying to frame me!
Duo: Is that so? Well then, care to tell me who this person might be?
Kuwabara: (Thinking extra fast) It could have been... uh... Kurama! Yeah! Kurama! Why don't you go question him??? Hey, I hear that youko form of his is really unpredictable!
Duo: I'll let ya off this time buddy, but if the other guy's story checks out, I'm gonna haul your ass back here and grill you twice as hard. Hear me???
Kuwabara:... Can I go now?
Duo: Ugh... alright... Botan, get him outta here.
Botan: Yessir!
Duo: ** I looked at him real smooth. There was a cold expression in his eyes, eyes that twitched only marginally when I gave him the hot light treatment. This Kurama fellow looked pissed, but that wasn't going to stop me.** You are Minamino Shuuichi? That's your human name, isn't it?
Kurama: Yeah.
Duo: Tell me honestly, *Shuuichi*. DID YOU KILL URAMESHI YUUSUKE???
Kurama: No!
Duo: Don't lie to me! That Kuwabara guy told me all about it.
Kurama: Kuwabara-kun?? That bastard!
Duo: So you admit it?
Kurama: I certainly do not!
Duo: **I slammed my fist on the table.** YOU KILLED URAMESHI YUUSUKE SO YOU COULD BE THE TOP BISHOUNEN OF YUU YUU HAKUSHO!
Kurama: What the hell???? I already am!
Duo: Wha.. oh, yeah... damn. Well then, where were you the night July 18th, at 11 pm?
Kurama: I was... I was...
Duo: Yeah?
Kurama: I have an alibi! I was with Hiei!
Duo: Hm, that's questionable! What were you doing?
Kurama: That's none of your business!
Duo: Isn't it? You have to SPILL. So do it!
Kurama: It's private!
Duo: Hah, that puts you under immediate suspicion then!
Kurama: You can't do that!
Duo: I can if you don't say.
Kurama: ALRIGHT, ALRIGHT, WE WERE HAVING SEX, HAPPY NOW???
Duo: Hm. Okay. ** Yeesh, some people can get so touchy.** Alright. You're off the hook for now, but I heard from Kuwabara that your youko form is a totally different personality. Get him here so I can question him too.
Kurama: (mumbling) I'm going to get Kuwabara for this... (louder) The youko doesn't like being disturbed.
Duo: Big doozy!
Kurama: (curses and shifts into youko) What do you want?
Duo: ** Yeeks! This guy is scary! Not to mention he kinda reminds me of Trowa...** You sound familiar some how... but I'm not going to let that stop me from uncovering the truth! Did you kill Urameshi Yuusuke?
Youko Kurama: What for?
Duo: He was destined to inherit part of the Makai. You'd naturally be interested in *that*.
Youko Kurama: Look kid, if I wanted part of the Makai, it would already be mine. And also, the murder weapon was a gun. What would I, in fact, what would Shuuichi, do with a gun?
Duo:... umm... It's a clever ploy to rid yourself of suspicion!
Youko Kurama: Damn, you're thick! I did *not* kill Yuusuke.
Duo: Hm. Looks like you're not guilty after all. But I still have to check on your alibi. Who was on top?
Youko Kurama: (shifts back to Shuuichi) What the hell does that have to do with anything????!!!
Duo: Plenty! Besides, I'm curious.
Kurama: You little pigtailed poor excuse of a Gundam pilot!
Duo: No need for insults! Just answer the question!
Kurama:... Hiei.
Duo: Thank you. Botan!
Botan: Sir?
Duo: This guy is free to go... for now.
Duo: ** And I thought Kurama was tough. This guy looked as if he could burn a hole straight through to the eighteenth level of hell. He was going to be the hardest nut to crack.** Imigo Hiei, DID YOU KILL URAMESHI YUUSUKE???
Hiei: WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU SHOUTING FOR? YOU DON'T HAVE TO SHOUT YOU KNOW!
Duo: Hm, never mind. Kurama says that you were with him the night of July 18th, 11 pm. Is that true?
Hiei: Hn.
Duo: I'll take that as a yes. So, who was on top?
Hiei: What the bloody does that have to do with anything?!
Duo: This is to check out his alibi. And your own. WHO WAS ON TOP???
Hiei: I TOLD YOU, YOU DON'T HAVE TO SHOUT.
Duo: (rubbing his ears) Okay, okay, I get the message.
Hiei: Hmm... before or after eleven-thirty?
Duo: (stares) Uhh... before eleven-thirty.
Hiei: I was.
Duo: Hm... it checks out, but it could just mean that you two had a little rendevous to get your stories straight. One more thing to confirm... did he scream?
Hiei: Ye--I mean, WHAT DOES THIS HAVE TO DO WITH KILLING YUUSUKE????
Duo: Nothing. I was just curious.
Hiei: JAOU ENSATSU KOKURYUU--
Duo: Now, now, Hiei you don't want to torch this confined little interrogation room with yourself in it, would you?
Hiei: Fuck this.
Duo: You have the perfect motive! You work for Mukuro, who wants to get Raizen's third of the Makai!
Hiei: I wouldn't kill a fly for that bitch.
Duo: Doesn't mean you wouldn't want it for yourself!
Hiei: Hn.
Duo: You killed him, didn't you???
Hiei: Hn.
Duo: Answer me!
Hiei: Hn.
Duo: You little bastard!
Hiei: So what if I am?(manifests a sword of dark fire)
Duo: Er... put that thing down Hiei... I'm sure we can work this out...
Hiei: Let me out before you're sushi.
Duo: EEK! Botan!
Botan: Yes?
Duo: Hiei can go now...
[Outside, in the hall...]
Kurama: What is all this about Yuusuke getting murdered?
Kuwabara: I dunno! One minute I was listening to the teacher drone out the English lesson, the next minute, wham, I'm sitting in that crazy room being grilled by a Gundam pilot on a caffeine high!
Kurama: There's something fishy going on here... Hey, there's Hiei!
Hiei: Okay, just for the record, who bumped off Urameshi?
Kurama: You mean you didn't do it?
Hiei: (hurt) You suspected me?
Kurama: Of course not, koibito! (hug)
Kuwabara: (pauses to gag)
Duo: (bursting out of the store--er, interrogation room) I have it! I know who killed Urameshi Yuusuke! (grabs the blue haired Reikai ferry girl by the kimono)
Kuwabara: Botan???
Duo: No! (Tears off a mask to reveal Yuusuke in Botan's clothes)
Yuusuke: Er... hi guys.
Hiei: Yuusuke? Cross dressing? Hn, I thought only Kurama went for that sort of thing.
Kurama: Hiei!
Duo: To escape Keiko's latest malleting spree, Yuusuke disguised himself as Botan, Reikai ferry girl, while she went off to the Bahamas for a vacation.
Yuusuke: Yeesh, you saw through it the whole time.
Duo: But of course.
Kurama: How on earth did you come to that conclusion with our stupid statements?
Duo: Oh, that's easy. Botan is the only female here.
Kurama: That's hardly logical.
Duo: Doesn't have to be. This is a fanfic, remember? Anyway, I've got to be going. Heero's waiting up for me. (Hops into his waiting Gundam and sails off through the air)
Kuwabara: Gee, that was pointless.
Kurama: I'll say.
Hiei: Hn.
Yuusuke: Looks like I'll have to find a better disguise. Hey... is that Keiko? Er...Bye guys!
Kuwabara: Well, guess it's time to go that movie with Yukina...
Hiei: YOU STAY AWAY FROM HER!
Kuwabara: Yeah? Why should I?
Hiei: Because...because...
Kurama: Kuwabara, wy don't you go watch that movies of yours and leave Hiei to me?
(Kuwabara goes off too, grumbling like heck)
Kurama: (turning to Hiei) Now, *who's* turn is it to be on top?
THE END
Author's Notes: Damn, that was pointless. Anyway, you can email me if you hated it or if you actually liked it at cresent_star@hotmail.com.
Cresent Star (c) 1998 (This is definitely not worth copying)