RANMA 1/2
Roku-bun No San (3/6)
by A-kun the Superfan
Part 1
Here's my first fanfic. I got to thinking what might happen if...well, I'll just let you read.
Disclaimers:The usual for any fanfic.
Shin Saotome: Think Ranma without the pigtail.
Ranko Saotome: Think Ranma-chan with a ponytail instead of a pigtail.
Any other unknown characters I'll explain later in the story. I'll also be putting in poems, commercials, etc. in the story. However, I may get too caught up in the tale to put them in right away.
I am also a cameo freak, so watch carefully for mentionings or appearances by unusual characters.
And I must warn that it will be serious first and will degrade even further than Miss Takahashi would permit.
I know other people have made stories involving Ranma having family members, but this is MINE AND ONLY MINE! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
And I reserve the right to use semi-profane words. Example: rearend, butt, thigh, nudity, jello, squishy and pop.
Later, I decided to throw something together with vampires.
Enjoy! ^_^
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Opening Theme Song - "Don't Make Me Wild Like You"
A-kun's attribute to the story (A-kun:seemed appropriate)
Yappa paa, Yappa paa - don't know what to do
My heart is not a game - it's Mah-Jongg to you
Yappa paa, Yappa paa - feel like such a shrew
Who needs boys? Don't you dare - make me wild like you
Before you, boys got on their knees
Ranma, Ranma - it's me you always tease
Since the day I ran into you
Ranma, Ranma you - stole my heart and you -
Don't you dare go and - make me wild like you.
Somebody tell me why it's so hard
To say those three words, "I love you"?
If I let myself give into you
I'll become just as - wild as you!
Before you come in like a breeze
Won't you stop and ring the bell, please?
Before you make my heart a home
Why not let me love you on my own?
I'd better off without you -
But just tonight it's all right...
Until tomorrow, all right.
Everytime your eyes turn to me
Ranma, Ranma, you - make me feel dizzy
Someday we may be more than "friends"
Ranma, Ranma you've - gone and done it true -
Can't you see that you've - made me wild like you.
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Prologue
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-"Grasshopper, if you are ever put into jail, never call me. I don't want my rep destroyed."- Happosai to his first student.
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"This had better work." the business man said.
"I told you that you wouldn't waste your money and I'm a man of my word." the scientist replied.
"Are you sure this won't create any paradoxes or nothing?" the assistant asked.
"This machine takes the energy pattern of the person designated and reproduces it, then sends the first back to the time and place it was and the copy appears on the platform. I'm not stupid! I know the possibility of causing a temporal loop or a paradox. This way, we don't have that problem because the person is still technically there." the scientist answered.
"And the possibilities are endless! Think about! Being able to not only preserve endangered species and restore extinct species, but being able to make sure that we never lose valued scientists and engineers to accidents!" the assistant said, excitedly.
"Enough babble! Let's test this machine." the business man said, irritated. The machine posed the intresting idea of pulling advanced technology from the future.
"I believe we should try something close to our own time for trials before trying for something deep in the past." the scientist replied.
"Alright. I just want to make sure I get my investment's worth." the business man replied.
The scientist smiled.
"Do not worry. Although we've done inanimate objects and basic plants and animals, bringing a human will prove that ANY mammal may be transported."
He set the computer to finding a suitable human subject. The computer beeped as it found a suitable test subject. The scientist and assistant flicked a number of switches and pressed a variety of buttons.
The scientist wrapped his hand around the last switch and took a deep breath.
"This is for all of science!" He cried.
Shin Saotome sat with his two fiancees and couldn't help but smile. He was lucky that Akane and Ukyo never fought, otherwise it would seriously stress him out. The way it turned out, the three of them were close friends.
They sat on a grassy hill on a blanket.
"Akane, is that your delicious lunch I smell?" Ukyo asked.
Akane blushed.
"Yeah." Akane said, obviously embarrassed.
"Hey, the mistake was a simple one last time. You mixed up, that's all." Shin said, smiling.
"Hey, Shin!" Ryoga yelled.
The three turned to see Ryoga, Nabiki, Kasumi, Dr. Tofu, Shampoo, Aloe (Think Shampoo with shorter blue hair and blue eyes), Mousse, and Gosunkugi walking up next to them.
"You wouldn't believe it, but Ryoga got us here all by himself without getting lost once!" Nabiki said, hugging Ryoga's arm.
"Great going!" Shin said.
"Yay!" Ukyo cheered.
Dr. Tofu and Kasumi sat down together next to Nabiki and Ryoga. Gosunkugi and Aloe sat next to each other with Shampoo and Mousse.
"Maybe it was because of his workout with you last night. I mean, the floor boards were squeaking!" Shin said, grinning.
The two blushed. Kasumi giggled.
"Oh, Kasumi? Can you and Dr. Tofu be a little louder? I think someone in Tokyo actually fell asleep." Shin commented, obviously trying to embarrass the nearly married couple.
Kasumi and Dr. Tofu blushed. Gosunkugi and Aloe laughed.
"You should laugh! After all, Shampoo and Mousse had to move in with us because you two keep them up all night." Akane said, smiling slyly.
"Aloe should be happy that great-grandmother go back to China." Shampoo said.
"You're picking up japanese pretty well." Ukyo said.
"Mousse is teaching Shampoo to speak properly. Shampoo speak much more goodly japanese!" Shampoo said proudly.
"Speak better japanese. It's speak better japanese, Shampoo." Shin told her, smiling.
"It doesn't matter really. I mean, she speaks better japanese than most of the deliquents in our school." Ukyo commented.
"True." Akane and Shin replied.
"Listen, I forgot something, so I'll just go grab it." Shin said, standing up.
"Hurry back!" Everyone told him.
"I will!" Shin yelled in replied.
With that, Shin ran down the hill.
Ranko Saotome sat in her room, sighing as she sadly looked through a photo album of her mother. It was all she had left ever since her mother had died after giving birth to her.
Tears filled her eyes. She had never gotten to see her mother. Then, a few months ago, her father and Mr. Tendo's master, Happosai, had shown up. The two had waited until Happosai was asleep before.....
She shook her head. The two had slain Happosai and didn't even defend themselves in court, only repeating "The demon is dead. The demon is dead."
Idiocy! Her father left her all alone. Sure, the Tendos could take care of her, but no one from her own family was there. She sighed, closed the book and began to cry.
Shin felt a warm light surround him. Within seconds, the light faded and disappeared. Shin shrugged and went on with his life.
Ranko didn't notice the light at all. She just continued crying.
"The energy is out of control! It's going to-" the assistant never got to finish the sentence.
The room was engulfed in flames.
============================================================-"So it all falls out, that what we have, we prize not the value while's we enjoy it; But, by being lack and lost, why then we find the value and then we find the virtue that possesion would not permit us, while's it was ours."- Famous speech I decided to throw in.
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It Begins....
Shin woke up.
"What the hell just happened?" He asked.
He stood up and looked around. It looked like an explosion had occured.
He looked for something that might explain what had happened, who he was or who the strange girl who the same height as him with the nasty looking katana standing next to him was.
Ranko was trying to figure out who she was and who the boy with the bo across his back was.
They recalled their names, special techniques and other basic information, but they didn't know how they knew it or
even recall the simplest memory. From the look on the other's face, they got the impression they were in pretty much the same position.
"Uh, hi. I'm Shin Saotome." He said, extending his hand to her.
"I'm Ranko Saotome." Ranko replied.
"Are you my sister?" Shin asked.
"I don't know." Ranko replied.
"Well, if we don't want to get in trouble for this, we'd better get going." Shin said.
"Hey, a car!" Ranko said, pointing to a red car.
They reached the red american sports car quickly.
"Is it ours?" Ranko asked.
"Do we care?" Shin asked.
Shin opened the door, saw the keys in the ignition and grinned. (Hero law: The keys on any car that the hero(es) must use, will always have the keys in the ignition or in an obvious place.)
"Let's go." Shin said.
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-"You're really pissing me off!!!!!"- Odin to A-kun, just before A-kun and Loki are thrown out of Vahalla.
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"Where'd you learn to drive?!?!?!" Ranko asked/ screamed.
"'Ace Ventura 2: When Nature Calls', why?" Shin asked, looking at Ranko.
Ranko screamed as the car went on two wheels as they turned the corner.
"Oh, don't worry. I know that I was in a stunt driving class...or at least I think I was." Shin told her.
Her confidence was not boosted. In fact, it was at an all time low.
"Pull over! I'm driving!" Ranko yelled.
Later, with Ranko driving, they arrived in Tokyo. Shin sighed as Ranko wasn't driving as fast as he would like to go.
"Come on, Ranko. We're in a sports car. Why do you think they're called sports cars? Because they're used in sports like baseball! I mean, haven't you ever seen a sports car on a baseball field?" Shin asked.
"No." Ranko replied.
"Well, I have. Or was that in 'Naked Gun'? Aw, who cares." Shin said.
"Look, we've dicussed this and I, for one, want to live to get to the Tendo dojo." Ranko replied.
"Do you have a driver's license?" Shin asked.
"No." Ranko replied.
"WHAT? I"VE BEEN DRIVING FIFTY MILES WITH A GIRL WHO DOESN'T HAVE A DRIVER'S LICENSE?!?!?!?!?!?! PULL OVER!!!" Shin yelled.
"Do YOU have a driver's license?" Ranko asked, pulling over.
Shin pulled out his wallet and produced a driver's license.
"Shin, this says you're thirty-five." Ranko said.
"Your point being?" Shin asked.
"My point being if a cop pulls us over, this ain't going to be any good!" Ranko replied.
"And if a cop pulls us over now, he'll think you're joyriding! It's safer with me at the wheel. And I promise to keep it under 100 mph this time." Shin said.
"65 mph." Ranko stated.
"Alright, 65 mph." Shin replied.
The car screeched to a halt in front of the Tendo dojo.
"Did you have to do the 180?" Ranko asked, her stomach refusing the food she ate earlier.
"Like-a-glove!" Shin said, imitating Ace Ventura.
"More like an airplane slamming in a control tower." Ranko replied. (Author's note: Big and graceful, and leaves a mess. Same thing can be said about a new puppy, A-chan, and Loki.)
"Hey, we're here in one piece, aren't we?" Shin asked.
"Not the car." Ranko said, pointing to the numerous dents and scratches along the sides and front of the car.
"Well, I'm glad it ain't ours." Shin said.
"How do you know?" Ranko asked.
"Says in the paper work that I was reading, it belongs to some other guy." Shin replied.
"When did you have time to read that?" Ranko asked.
"When I was driving, of course." Shin answered.
Ranko's right eye twitched and sweat drops appeared behind her.
"I think we need to restore YOUR memory first. Then maybe you'll realize what you've done." Ranko said.
"Not likely, but possible. I don't know why, but I really like driving. There's something about racing down a street at 120 mph, wheels squealing, people lunging out of the way, axles nearly snapping, it's so exihilarating!" Shin said.
With the mentioning of 'axles snapping', the axles groaned and broke, startling the two.
"I think you just like the sound of an engine going full throttle." Ranko replied.
"I guess so. Anyway, it ain't my car, so it ain't my problem." Shin said, ignorantly.
"You've seen too many action films." Ranko muttered as they got out of the car.
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-"Do NOT go in there! Hwoo!"- Ace Ventura.
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Ranma-chan was sweating profusely. Nodoka had shown up a day ago, and was bugging Ranma-chan to try on some dresses.
Of course, having Akane, Kasumi, and Nabiki there was no help as they had proded Ranma-chan into trying the dresses on. So, Ranma-chan sat in the somewhat spacious women's changing room with a bunch of dresses in front of her.
The frilly dress Nabiki had given her to try on was WAY out of line. The dress Akane had chosen was a light pink, so no way was she wearing that. Nodoka had given her a strapless black silk outfit. Only Kasumi had been kind enough to give her a practical outfit, which was a lot like Kasumi's standard outfit.
Ranma-chan frowned. She NEVER liked dresses, after all, she was really a guy. She sighed and since the three Tendo girls had given her an ultimatum, she had no choice but go along with their demands or buy and wear the most embarrassing red.....thing that a girl could wear.
They had also threatened to tell Nodoka that she needed undergarments to match if she didn't choose at least two dresses. Ranma-chan just never thought that Kasumi would be the one to threaten Ranma-chan with that.
The strapless outfit and the outfit that looked like Kasumi's were the only acceptable choices. The others would be too...too...girly. At least she could looked all right with the ones she had already chosen.
She grab the two from the four and walked out with them.
"I've decided." Ranma-chan said.
"RANKO, we have to see you try them or the deal's off." Akane said, smiling evilly.
Ranma-chan was about to complain when she realized that Nabiki stood ready to tell Nodoka. She sighed and walked back in, after giving Akane the two dresses she didin't want.
Ranma-chan walked out two minutes later wearing the Kasumi-esque outfit. The girls admired Ranma-chan, then pushed her back in to put on the other outfit.
Ranma-chan walked out ten minutes later with the strapless outfit, feeling dirty and slimely.
"Oh, Ranko. You're so pretty." Nodoka said.
Nabiki and Akane were on the verge of breaking out into laughter and did so. Kasumi just smiled. Ranma-chan marched right back into the changing room and walked out wearing her normal outfit and carrying the two dresses.
"Alright, let's just get outta here." Ranma-chan said.
After paying for the dresses, Nabiki and Akane grinned like maniacs.
"If it's this funny, let's just do it." Akane whispered, obviously having fun in torturing Ranma-chan. Nabiki nodded.
"Hey auntie, I think Ranko needs some undergarments to go with those outfits. I mean, all she wears is boxers. That's not right that she shouldn't have female undergarments." Nabiki said, grinning madly.
"Hey, you promised!" Ranma-chan said.
"We agreed not to inform her in the store." Nabiki said, still grinning.
"You're right, Nabiki. Come on, Ranko. By the time we're through with you, you'll be a whole new woman." Nodoka said, dragging Ranko off to other stores.
"And a whole new pervert." Akane whispered to Nabiki, who giggled.
They followed, laughing and smiling all the way.
Ranko and Shin were laying on 'their' futons trying to remember more about their lives than the movies they've seen, etc. They both were obilivous to the sound of Genma-panda and Soun playing Shogi downstairs and the sound of the five women coming home.
Shin sighed, got up and went to the upstairs bathroom. (Author's note: I'm assuming there's an upstairs bathroom.) Shin turned on the cold water and splashed his face. Shin then looked up into the mirror to see something unexpected, well, for someone who has few memories outside of movies anyway.
Shin looked at the redhaired female that was the same height as he was in the mirror and after looking at him...er, herself to make sure, she fainted.
Finally, after three minutes, Shin-chan woke up. And after regaining more of her memory (through the natural shock to his....er, her system), she calmly walked back to 'her' room with two glasses of cold and hot water.
Ranma-chan and Nodoka walked upstairs to put Ranma-chan's new purchases away. As they walked into the room, they both noticed Shin-chan and Ranko facing each other, and talking.
"Why, Ranko. You never told me you had sisters, let alone identical sisters." Nodoka said.
Ranko, Shin-chan and Ranma-chan looked at each other for a while. Not moving, not even blinking. Suddenly, Shin-chan decided to act.
"Sis! It's been so long!" Shin-chan said, zipping up and hugging Ranma-chan.
"I can't believe it! We're finally a family again!" Ranko cried, as she followed Shin-chan's lead and hugged Ranma-chan as well.
If it caught on a camera, it would have been THE Kodak moment. If it were on film, it would have won an Oscar for performance. As none of these were present, it was just a very touching moment.
Nodoka sighed, wishing Ranma was there. (Ah, if only she knew.)
"We've got a LOT to talk about!" Shin-chan said, pulling Ranko and Ranma-chan off.
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-"Sure. Bite me!"- A-kun when asked if he would comment on camera.
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"Hold it. You mean, you're both from another dimension, you can't remember very much, and you have no idea of how you got here?" Ranma-chan asked.
Shin-chan and Ranko nodded. Ranma-chan groaned and began rubbing the bridge of her nose.
"As if my life wasn't complicated enough." Ranma-chan said, sarcastically.
Shin-chan rapped her over the head with her bo.
"Look, we don't like it either, but we had no choice in the matter. It doesn't matter whether your life is or isn't complicated, because whether or not you like it, it's happening. The best way to handle it is to accept it and try to find a way BACK to our home universes." Shin-chan replied.
"Besides, that lady thinks we're you're sisters, so we're stuck here." Ranko told Ranma-chan.
Ranma-chan sighed.
"By the way, who was that lady?" Ranko asked.
"Mom? You don't know her?" Ranma-chan asked.
"Mommy?" Ranko asked in a a small voice.
"What do you remember?" Shin-chan asked.
Ranko burst into tears and hugged Shin-chan, who was uncomfortable.
"I'm going to make an assumption here, Ranko, and I'd like you to just nod or shake your head if I'm wrong. Okay?" Shin-chan asked softly.
Ranko nodded.
"Did you lose your mother?" Shin-chan asked quietly.
Ranko cried harder and nodded. Shin-chan hugged her closer. Ranma-chan, who can't stand seeing girls cry, put her hand on Ranko's shoulder, hoping that it might comfort Ranko.
Ranko's crying slowed and finally after a while, she stopped, but she was still red-eyed and sniffing.
"For what it's worth, we're your brothers now. We'll take care of you." Ranma-chan said.
Ranko smiled slightly.
"Thanks, Ranma." Ranko said.
"If she's mom, why isn't she calling you by your first name?" Shin-chan asked.
"Cause she doesn't know about my curse or any other." Ranma-chan replied.
"You'd better give us the run down of your life. Who knows, maybe'll it'll spark our memory further." Shin-chan suggested.
"This'll take a while." Ranma-chan said.
"We're listening." Shin-chan replied.
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-"Put a spoonful of wine into a barrel of sewage and you get sewage. Put a spoonful of sewage into a barrel of wine and you get sewage. But, put a spoonful of Akane's cooking into either and you get Akane's cooking."- Ranma's twist on Murphy's law.
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Ranko, Shin-chan and Ranma-chan finished explaining the situation to the Tendos and to 'Mr. Panda', when Nodoka walked in. (It took a while to calm Ranko down and understand that Mr. Tendo and Genma had NOT broken out of jail, and yes, she did recall that.)
"Come on, Kasumi. We'd better start on dinner. And after dinner, you can introduce me to your sisters, Ranko." Nodoka said, smiling.
After Kasumi left, the trio of cursed inhabitants let out the breath they had been holding.
"We'd better come up with names and quick." Ranko said.
Ranma-chan and Shin-chan nodded.
"How about Gina and Brianna?" Akane asked.
"We're trying to sound japanese, Akane. Though I kinda like the names." Shin-chan replied.
"How about Azusa and Kodachi?" Genma-panda signed.
"We don't want to be named after psychopaths." the trio said in unison.
"I think we'd better use unusual names. Ayeka and Sasami." Shin-chan said.
"I like 'em." Ranma-chan said.
"I'll take Ayeka." Ranko said.
"Sasami and Ayeka Tendo?" Akane asked.
"Yep." Shin-chan replied.
"Well, SISTERS. What are we going to do?" Ranko/Ayeka asked.
"What do you mean?" Ranma-chan asked.
"She means 'what are we going to do all day?' I guess we could go to school posing as cousins of yours." Shin-chan/Sasami suggested.
Ranma-chan shrugged.
"Like anyone pays attention to stuff like that." Ranma-chan replied.
"Pig-tailed girl!" Kuno cried as he raced in.
Kuno promptly stopped.
"What is this? Three of my goddesses?" Kuno asked.
"Their cousins of mine." Ranma-chan told him.
"I would give my love to you and Akane alone, but I cannot allow such beauty to be defiled by that sorceror Ranma Saotome. Therefore, I shall date with all of you!" Kuno said.
Kuno didn't notice Shin-chan/Sasami's blazing aura, the fact that she had pulled her bo and was currently preparing to smash his skull in.
"Come to me, my loves!" Kuno cried, lunging forward with his arms wide.
Shin-chan/Sasami's bo smashed into Kuno's forehead and sent him into the wall surrounding the dojo. Shin-chan followed, her eyes blazing. She grabbed Kuno and with a jab to his nose (which broke under the first hit despite the fact that it wasn't hit), sent him flying.
"COME BACK AND I'LL KILL YOU!!!" Shin-chan screamed.
Kuno vanished and became a star in the night sky. Ranma-chan and Ranko walked out to her.
"Yo, what's up....Sasami?" Ranma-chan asked as Nodoka walked out.
"What's going on?" Nodoka asked.
Shin-chan/Sasami noticed Nodoka had come out to see what the commotion was.
"Nothing." Shin-chan/Sasami replied.
She walked to the dojo.
"I have a feeling that it's not nothing." Ranko/Ayeka commented.
Nodoka watched Shin-chan/Sasami's departure worriedly.
"What happened?" Nodoka asked.
"Uh, a boy that she doesn't like came in and asked her to date him. She didn't take it well." Ranma-chan replied.
"From that screaming, I'd think she hated him to the core." Ranko/Ayeka muttered.
Ranma-chan nodded in agreement.
"I'll go see what's up. You go help m...auntie in the kitchen." Ranko/Ayeka told Ranma-chan.
"Okay." Ranma-chan replied, walking inside as Ranko/Ayeka walked to see what was going on.
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