For any of you bachelors who have had yer friends set you up with the "perfect girl for you" (or say they say...) sometimes its hard to interpret the girl that they are describing to you. So here are a few interpretations [how many times am i gonna say interpret?!] that may help you:
dandy little house keeper:
fine character:
knows how to handle money:
spotless reputation:
strong family ties:
loves children:
wonderful personality:
great sense of humor:
the outdoor type:
ready to settle down:
likes to have a good time:
lots of fun at parties:
mature woman:
has the appearance of a young school girl:
casual:
decorated her own place:
a great dancer:
not overly emotional:
doesn't chase men:
understands men:
a good sport:
looks and dresses like a model:
been in show business:
traveled a lot:
knows a lot of interesting people:
wonderful disposition:
She has been married three times and kept all the houses
She's ugly
She's a spendthrift and great at spending yours
She's ugly
She's a Mafia Princess
She's pregnant and needs a husband
She's fat
She's fat and will laugh at anything you say
She hunts, fishes, chews tobacco, and shaves just like the guys
She's thirty-five, in a state of panic, and dying to marry
She gets drunk a lot
Often makes an fool of herself
She's at least thirty, but looks at least forty-five
She's at least thirty-three, but dresses like a teenager
She dresses like a slob
Her apartment resembles a pig sty
She'll wear the soles right off your shoes
She only cries twenty-seven times a day
She's more of a mousetrap or a black widow spider type
She's been married and divorced four times
She knows two hundred jokes and can drink you under the table
She's five eleven and weighs seventy three pounds
She's a former porn movie star
She's searched high and low for a husband
None of whom would marry her
She's ugly
