THE FOUR LOVERS: AIR ON A COSMIC STRING
 
                Pre: A Dream 
 But sometimes when the day is through
 And all my work is done
 And Scarlettown seems far away 
 Beyond the setting sun
 I've lived my new adventures
 I've had my chance to roam
 I'd never thought I'd ever miss home
 I wish that we were travelling...home.
                          --A Song Whose Name
                            I Forget, But Its
                            Surely Not Mine

 It came without warning, unprovoked, and struck.
 No, that wasn't quite true.  There'd been warnings, 
but they weren't the normal kinds of warnings.  They 
were slim, exist for a seconds type warnings, the 
type that sensitives are trained to understand and 
respond to.
 Serena was a sensitive, but untrained.  Despite her 
four years with just the crystal--no Luna, no 
Senshi, no Tuxedo Mask to guide her hands and feed 
her words--she still did most of the things by 
instinct.  The Serenity side of her that she'd come 
closer to in these last years was just as baffled 
sometimes; it was the blood of the White Moon that 
sung to the crystal, and that same instinct that 
sometimes propelled her.  
 So the discomfort she felt on a beautiful spring 
day was chalked up to just a mood swing, and not to 
the subtle pressings of the crytal on her mind.  It 
was trying to tell her, trying to warn her in its 
unique, unobtrusive way that she was about to get 
slammed by Destiny, and she WASN'T going to like it.
 She didn't know how to listen, and so couldn't.  
Which is why awakening from the dream sprang upon 
her unwary mind was both pleasing and painful.  
Pleasing because it brought her back to reality, 
away from what she'd seen--painful because she knew 
what she had to do.
 It started when she'd returned home from work.  The 
boys, she knew, had gone out for the night; they 
were 21 to her 19, and occasionally enjoyed a Friday 
night plastering.  She, on the other hand, had a 
headache, and didn't care for drinking anyways.  
 
she humorously reminded herself.
  she 
thought with a near out loud sigh.
  her mind quickly stepped 
in.  The thought caught her so briskly, so swiftly, 
that she nearly stumbled, and her slim hand touched 
her forehead.  To her surprise, it was slightly 
warm, and with that, she decided that going to bed 
was the best possible thing for her to do.
 Before, though, she stopped in front of her picture 
of Tuxedo Mask.  The boys had never asked, and she'd 
never said, appreciatingly their rein on their 
curiosity.   she thought to herself 
as she ran a finger over the shockingly clean glass.  
 she thought.  Her eyes knew every precise 
detail, even if it was a little blurred; Tux in his 
tux, top hat, opaque mask, rose in his hand.  
Instinctively, she hugged it to her chest, the glass 
cold through her blouse.  Setting it down, she ran 
her finger over it once more.
  she thought sadly as she walked into 
her bedroom, letting her hair down.  
  
she quickly amended as she began to slip out of her 
clothes.  As a gag, she and the guys had rented it 
one Saturday, months before.  None of them knew that 
three girls who'd once been her best friends, her 
Senshi, had been extras in the movie.
 And that one named Mina had a rather large cameo.  
She showed up as a model walking down a runway, walk 
perfect, mood perfect, hair swinging just right, 
stopping to give the "V for Victory!" sign to the 
camera.  
 Serena had nearly died right there.  She couldn't 
bring herself to tell the guys, but Zach had 
approached her later after checking out the credits.  
And Jade had pried a confession of out her as well.  
Yet Nathan and Kevin...she couldn't tell them.  
Confront them with their beauties and say she 
wouldn't go back?  They'd fight it, but they'd 
always stay with here.  They were her Generals now, 
her Guardians, and they weren't going to leave her 
for anything but death.  Kevin had told her that.
 She sighed, mentally and physically, as she 
rummaged through the drawers to find something 
comfortable for bed.  It felt warm in the room, so 
she chose something thin and got herself a glass of 
water before letting her hair down.  It was what she 
did every night before she went to bed, to relax 
before her head hit the pillow.
 This night she stared at the moon, the white, large 
moon, not completely full, that hung outside her 
small window.  And she addressed it.
 "I miss them all," she whispered as her fingers 
skillfully undid the bindings of hair upon hair.  
"Even Raye.  I miss them like CRAZY! but there's 
nothing I can do.  I can't go back."  She took a 
breath, but it sounded like a choked sob, and she 
cringed.  "Even him.  Oh, I miss him the most.  Why 
can't I stop...loving him?" 
 "But I can't stop loving him...ever.  I wish I 
could see him...just once.  My love, my Darien...but 
I can't go back.  I'm dead to them, I have a new 
life here, and I'm happy."
 Her voice turned low and fragile, and one more 
whisper escaped her lips before her hair fell 
completely free.  "I miss them so MUCH..."
 Then she leaned back, head hitting the pillow as 
she smoothly covered herself with the lumpy quilt.  
And fell into a deep, deep, sleep...
 /"NONONONO DON'T HURT HIM!"/
 /What...what was...she was somewhere, somewhere 
dark, and it seemed like her eyes were glued to a 
television set as sound and picture blared at her 
from them....no escape, no escape...can't escape../
 /All she could do was watch./
 /Venus...Mercury...Jupiter?..yes, Lita it had to 
be! and Mars...all four Senshi, her friends...and 
all terrified, skin liked bleached cotten, eyes so 
wide and bright and teared it killed...it swooped 
down on her soul and wrenched it../
 /Green eyes, glittering emerald gems set into 
feminine skulls...two different women, same emerald 
eyes, same laugh...terrifying laugh on their 
lips.../
 /oh no...Darien?  Not Darien! No, 'twas Tux, only 
it wasn't Tux...he had no hat, and no jacket, but 
the mask was there...as the whip savagely curled in 
the air and flicked downwards, snapping in unison 
with his cry of pain...pain!/
 /blond hair...clear, no NOT clear blue eyes! Jade 
it was, but his eyes were so...clouded, so 
painful...to Kunz, to Kevin, the strong one, whose 
face was so contorted and eyes so weak with 
pain...with anguish...that she nearly burst into 
tears/
 /Tried anyway, but couldn't.../
 /What..it seemed like she'd just seen the last 
frame of a...something...the word was gone...as a 
woman's green hair whipped around, thin strands of 
green laced with purple...purple eyes?/
 /Not Darien again! No, Tux, completely together, 
but maskless...face such a rage, so much anger 
and..HATRED?  LOATHING? that she nearly lost her 
breath gazing at him...a few fine aqua hairs flirted 
with the edge of the picture, and strong, gloved 
hands teased Tux in the frames, eluding his 
guard...but no face...only Darien's hate.../
 /The pictures vanished, and she was in the dark, 
totally in the dark, and alone...always 
alone...until the faint stirring of speaker beside 
her caused her to lean closer and listen to someone 
speak what sounded like their last, dying words.../
 /"I love you, Serena."/
 She leaped upwards from her bed, screaming her 
heart out, tears running down her cheeks.  
Immediately she fell back downwards; the room was 
ice cold, so much that there was no condensation on 
her glass.  She sobbed into her pillow and her long, 
blond hair for a few minutes, utter anguish over the 
tormented pictures she'd seen, her soul heaving the 
sorrow up like emotional puke.  
 Her sobbing cut off abruptly, and she rose slowly 
from her bed.  Again the white moon was in view, 
though not quite as much as before--the world had 
turned as she slept.  She wiped her eyes of some of 
the tears, and then, with soft, harsh spoken words 
that had to be peeled away from her throat, she 
whispered, "Home." 


    Source: geocities.com/tokyo/shrine/1721

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