a story
OK kiddies, Im gonna tell you how the world was made.
It all happend along time ago.....
a story
Once apon a time there was a large mass of energy. In this large mass of energy, there was a thing.
It looked like a human, but wasn't one, because they didn't exist then.
And it was bored. How would you feel if you had been sitting around for who knows how long (it really couldn't tell, because time hadnt been made yet) ?
I bet you'd be bored too.
So it did stuff. Of course, to normal people this stuff would have seemed amazing and wonderful, but to the thing it was just stuff.
When you dont have any experiences to base things on, everything is normal.
So it made things and put them on another thing.
The things it made were just little shapes, but they were alive.
The shapes died pretty quickly after that. If your just a little square, its hard move around and eat the other shapes. The circle had a better time of it, but didn't have a way to eat stuff so it died too.
The thing that had made all this stuff figured out (after a while) that the things kept dying because they couldn't get any energy.
So the thing made different things (not shapes this time, but blobs) but they died immediately because the thing that the creator of the stuff put them on had no atmosphere so they just imploded. It was quite messy.
'This is really frustrating,' the great thing thought and went off and sulked for a while.
After it had finished pouting it made an atmosphere on the thing that the other things had been living on. The creator named it Valhalla.
Then it made slime.
The slime died because it was to cold.
So the creator made the sun and night and day, all that sort of stuff. Night and day didn't work very well because there was no time, so the thing made it.
Then the slime dried up and died. The creator was getting really annoyed with this picky slime so it made water, mountains, volcanoes, et.
So after all this, the slime lived and was very happy and eventually evolved in to things like humans, but wernt. They were gods.
But since the creator had a very short attention span, it missed out on all this.
After a while it looked down on Valhalla, and was surprised to see that the slime had changed.
So it went down to talk to the most intelligent creatures. They knew who she was (of course its a girl! Creation *is* a female function.) and brought her to their king.
His name was Thor. She didn't much like him because all he did was suck up and secretly wish for more power. It bothered her.
She noticed that all the gods had names, so she named herself Lilith.
But, she had made a mistake.
When she had made the slime, she gave it to much power, and now the gods had to much power, and she was to inexperienced to keep control of them.
She became very angry at there treachery, and abandoned them. The gods had enough power to stay independent, but now they had to do exactly what Thor said.
Missing Valhalla, Lillith made a new plane of existence.
She didn't give the beginning creatures as much energy as before, and she did something else.
Lillith made many dementions within one. It was like a pie, with an almost infinite amount of pieces.
But, the new little slimy things were too dumb to figure out how to switch around dimentions, so Lilith made 3 planes of exsistance.
There was the human thingy level, the ghostie level, and the weird sorta blobby level. But then the blobbys annoyed her so she shot purple death rays at them and they all died. She liked death rays.
So then the smarter humans could get in contact with the ghosties. And when humans died, went to become ghosties. And when the ghosties died, they went to be humans.
So Lilith was quite pleased with herself, and decided to have a nap.
When she had woke up, things had changed. There was this god thing. He kept babbiling about sin so she used green death rays on him. She was afraid the red would only make him rant more.
Valhalla was gone, and so were most of the smart humans. The dumb ones belived in this god thing she had killed. So she went and read alot of bitter aithest pages and was glad she used green death rays.
Then she saw a guy called Pat Robertson. He also liked to talk about sin. So she picked him up and threw him at a wall for a while. Then he died. Lilith was proud.
But then the little human police came and took her to 'jail'. It was very amusing when they freaked out about how the door to her 'cell' kept opening.
They asked her if she was on drugs. She asked what drugs were. They asked if she was on pills. She asked what their problem was. She went back to the 'cell'. 'Human words are fun!' She thought.
So then she went to court, and the insurance companys were mad that the act of god excuse woulnt work anymore, but then with the act of Lilith thing, if someone named Lilith torched your house, they wouldnt have to pay.
So there was a big trial and was found guilty on 12 counts of murder, because she kept killing the jury and lawyers out of bordom.
After 5 minutes in jail, she decided that the manish looking girls were scary and left. The police came after her, so she shot aqua-marine death rays (she would have used ornge-red, but she didnt want to destroy the world.) The army came after that, and when she was done with them, the power rangers came. It was quite amusing to see them explode when filled with the 'TNT' stuff the army was throwing at her.
But then, the awfulest thing happend, The Invation of The Butch Dykes!
Damnit! The stupid Shauna's father thing is yelling for her to go to bed! Sleep is for the day! He will be the first to die.