Untitled Poems

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As a spring rain wets my face
I search in vain for your embrace
As if no one can take your place
For you all other names erase

Though time has passed and we're no more
I feel for you in the depths of my core
And yet your love I can't implore
We've both been down his road before

In traveling we lost ourselves
In the tale we tried to sell
The truth to ourselves we didn't tell
Until we heard the ringing bells

And by then it was too late
It was gone, we could not save



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When in sweet remembrance, I
Gaze into into a ruby memory
And try to find the moment I
Fell in love with thee

Was it the night I held you in my arms
'Til long past the midnight hour
Was it the night I looked deep into your eyes
Upon that ancient lofty tower
And there the sunrise did I see

The crisp winter's eve with fresh fallen snow
With soft the candle burning slow
And I said all I thought
The sky a lazy hue did cast
Upon the mountains far dispatched
From our world, our little part

I know not when I fell
Nor did I ever stop?
I still hear the ring of morning bells
Of the day from me you dropped



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I tell myself to hold my tears
I tell myself not to cry
I tell myself that it isn't my fault
I tell myself to walk by

I tell myself there is no reason
I tell myself it's her choice
I tell myself love the season
I tell myself it's her voice

I tell myself that I broke her trust
I tell myself I chased her away
I tell myself that I caused the rust
I tell myself I made it this way

I tell myself to sleep and dream
I tell myself to lie awake
I tell myself to stand up and scream
I tell myself not to break

I tell my heart to beat no more
I tell my mind not to think
I tell my lungs The heat makes you sore
I tell my throat not to drink

I tell myself to stop my crying
I tell myself don't sing that song
I tell myself there's no use in dying
I tell myself to let her walk on



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My mind clouds with thought
Dark and stormy memories
I kicked, I clawed, I fought
When I fell in love with thee
And now my fortress iron-wrought
Has fallen to it's knees

I wish I'd never loved you
You don't ever leave my mind
The stories you told must be untrue
Or why am I behind?
The women I have loved are few
Were YOU just being kind?

But when you call I run
To be right at your side
I hate that you love me none
After all I did confide
And now the ending has begun
Marked by the tears I cried

I hate you becuase I love you
I love you so much I hate you



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I sit remembering the velvet
Of your skin as it rested on mine
How deep inside my soul you crept
And I thought you'd stay for all time

But all I see is your memory
The phantom of your face on my heart
And my shadow is all that remains of me
My soul has left and took the art

Pathos of my sorrow full
Where your eyes once filled a starless night
Grey, cold Automn days dull
Where your smile once sunned my sight

But now my summer in gone
And cold, betrayed I sit
Worst fears of being alone
Are all the fil my hearts pit

An empty boat to cracked to sail
Along those seas it claimed as home
A quest in vain for my own grail
Has left me cold as stone

So as I sit and see you
As my eyes are closed so tight
The velvet that I briefly knew
Fades out of my sight

No longer do I feel your hands
They have turned to briars
No longer do I kiss your lips
They burn me hot like fire
No longer do I say I love you
For then, I would be a liar

For if alone I am to be
I cast thee off eternally



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We walked hand in hand
Beneath the cherry tree's limbs
But our fires, no longer fanned,
Burned out in the blowing wind

While slowly we walked, together
While our love blew away like a feather

And while away from our hearts it flew
On that Cold September morn,
My mind lost its sight of you
My dreams of you now airborne

But so has been this life of mine
And so shall be throughout my time

As on this world I walk alone
Hard as winter, cold as stone



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When in Darkened spirits I
Turn my head up to the sky
And, there, engraved upon the Heavens

As if innumerable fire flies
Sparkling as your gentle eyes
An image of your face I am given

All the beauty which surrounds
My loneliness with Nature's sounds
When I thought there's naught to believe in

Tolls your ghost so long and loud
As a bell's dark droning sound
And reminds me of our love deceiving

Deviled memories cloud my sight
Upon the chilled autumn night
When I alone so mad and sickened

Screamed your name with no delight
And jumped far away in away into the night
Living as my life would end



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I sit, staring out a window
To the darkness of the night
And it seems as if so long ago
Before my egress flight
I knew all there was to know

But now, I sit alone
Drinking a bottle with no name
In what I have made for home
While day and night which are the same
Revolve around me, cold as stone

I know not half as much
As I thought I knew
In fact through this dark Quarry, such
I found I have nothing left to do

But cry, alone, in this darkened night
Mourn for dead still living and I
More dead in spirit than any and all
Just waiting for my bells to call



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I sit here in candle light
For that is what I am to you
And as much as I tried to fight
There is nothing anymore that I can do

You know how you hold me
And that makes you hold me more
My love for you can not be seen
Or I shall throw the score

For although I love you true
I could never again love you
Despite that path which leads my heart
We must forever stay apart
To do otherwise would be murder
We can never be where we once were



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As I feel the life escape me
Through the puddle on the floor
I see you weren't there with me
And that made me want you more

And the more that I wanted you
The farther away you went
The only thing for me to do
Is live now with the love you left

You lie and say you miss me
Despite my pleas for honesty
The pain you caused and do not see
Racks my body constantly



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Sit I on the banks of a river
Beneath the boughs of a willow
My eyes, they join in it's weeping
I gasp, your name do I bellow

For I miss you to the greatest degree
I wish merely to hold you
The cards have said you'll return to me
There is no time too soon

But still you stay so distant
We ne'er talk when we speak
I miss the nights I looked to your eyes
My spirits are down, my body weak
As the water flows on down the creek
Beneath the willow where I weep
These tears that won't be heard.
Overhead there flew a bird
It perched itself upon my arm
Cocked its head to one side
I stared into its avian face
And once again I cried
How I wished that I could be
A bird, with wings so strong
I wish to fly away from here
When I feel I don't belong

I see these people so happy
Drunk upon the liquor of love
I wish that I could join these ranks
With the woman I think all of
But she wants it not
So should I now let go?
That's the question I have pondered
I guess I just don't know

What can I do?
To turn away is much too hard
All I ever wanted was you
As if reaching for a distant star
But when I started to get close
You moved away from me
I hope you like the path you chose
It's best if I leave you be.
Let the dust settle behind us.



This way to the Throne Room