March '01

Quote of the Month:

"When you're conquering Europe, your embouchure goes to hell." -- Dr. Downing, about Frederick the Great, 3/19


3/1

Study Hours, I think

"You get weirder everyday!" -- Mary

3/3

In a poorly plowed parking lot

"It's like driving over Alaska." -- Sarah Bonds

3/4

Phi Sigma Pi meeting

"It's new business because it's MY business!" -- Jarret, during new business, so technically this is a breach of the code of secrecy.


Online

"Is your subconscious trying to warn you about something? Oh wait, you can't answer that." -- Kim, dream interpreting.

3/5

Sadler Hall

"I've been Bermaned." -- Mary, after being licked on the forehead by Andrew

3/7

Study Hours, definitely

"from mama nookie sexy the" -- Jenn's graphing calculator. It alphabetizes things.

3/8

Club Windstar (it's back)

"Cute things don't get rabies!" -- Sara's quotable and she knows it :)
"Oh, I DO amuse myself!" -- Sara

3/10

The Pariah Party, night one

"Whatever gets you off my ass." -- Hoter, to Andrew, who was literally on her ass.
"You have the hugest cleavage I have ever seen on a Hoter!" -- Disuhan, to the superlative Hoter (after all, she is the only one).

3/11

The Pariah Party, night two

Variations on a theme: expletives that grow on vines.

"Grape raping orgy!" -- Disuhan
"Rape a grape in half!" -- Disuhan was in a weird mood that night.

And then she just became dilusional...

Hoter: Sitting Bull was from what tribe?
Disuhan: Sioux! I was there!

3/14

The Bermatorium

Disuhan: That makes things go shooting up my leg.
Sara: Happy things?

"I'm sorry darling, do you suck?" -- Mikey to Disuhan during a game of Hearts.

3/15

The Diner

"We can't eat red meat or white meat ... or blue meat." -- Kathleen, being patriotic about Lent

Sara: I like pickles.
Mikey: I would LOVE to go swimming!
Sara: ?

3/17

The Disuhacienda

Ben: I talk to Margaret every day online.
Sara: Uh huh. And I bet you talk to Justine too.

"You're ribbed ... for pleasure." -- Kathleen, to Mikey who was, well, ribbed for pleasure.

Sara: I'll call you at 9:00, and then at 9:10 to make sure you're awake.
Kathleen: It's the Sara snooze!

3/18

Panda West

"The sauce makes this dish amazing and excellent." -- The menu's overzealous and enthusiastic description of "Chicken Amazing"

3/19

Music history

"When you're conquering Europe, your embouchure goes to hell." -- Dr. Downing, about Frederick the Great


Online

"I have to work at 12:30, so I have to eat beforehand. And Kimmel has some very good beforehand." -- Alyssa


Kimmel

Alyssa: I have a very attractive friend Jim who lives in Booth.
Andrew: Is he gay?
Alyssa: No. Andrew: Useless!

3/20

Club Windstar

"Damn those creepy Oscars!" -- Miriam, about the Oscars creeping up on her.


Hendricks Chapel, Handbells Rehearsal

Jess Halbert: Okay, everyone. We're going to be serious now.
Nikki: (starts uncontrollably laughing) I was fine until you said we were going to be serious.


online

Lee (Kelly's friend): I walked in to pee.
Andrew: Ick! ... oh. I thought you said you walked into pee.

3/22

Kimmel

"Fuck me if I'm wrong, but is your name Grizelda Pollock?" -- Dan Bennett
"Because if you're going to suck on something, it should taste like ice cream." -- Hannah Bee, answering a question.

3/23

Dan Bart's Car, en route to Niagara Falls

Andrew: (burps)
Miriam: Andrew, say "excuse me."
Andrew: I may burp again.
Miriam: Then you'll have to say "excuse me squared."
Andrew: Why? I'm not burping burp times.

"If you want some soda you can lick my butt." -- Miriam, who had been sitting on a soda-stained car seat.

3/24

Pulling out of the Beaver

"The Beaver is scary to pull out of." -- Jenga

3/25

online

"Explain your ideal night: ketchup EVERYWHERE!" -- Kathleen
"Oh dear! I can do scary things." -- Kathleen, using Photoshop
"I just got a free tan!" -- Kathleen, still using Photoshop

3/27

E-mail

"I WILL NOW AND FOREVER HATE THE WORD MAYBE!" -- Pat, about the responses to Phi Sig's interchapter weekend.
"I ALSO HATE THE WORD TENTATIVE NOW!" -- Pat, about the RSVP to Alpha Beta

3/29

Bird Library, Study Hours

"I never recovered once Andrew disrobed." -- Smatt, playing Scrabble

3/30

Varsity Pizza, Big-little dinner

Lindsay: ...Esther Williams.
Andrew: What was the question?
Lindsay: What would you fear most while swimming?

3/31

Club Windstar, en route to Spaghetti Warehouse

"If you have a black and white spiral of death, touch seven." -- Benny

Dan Bennett will heretofor be referred to as Benny.
Previous and future references to the name "Jenga" are to Jenn Gagliano.
Smatt is Matt Rouillard, duh.


Sara's Room

Matt: There were like a bagillion minivans from Ontario driving to Syracuse.
Sara: That's because we're hosting the New York State Ontario Minivan Convention.

"They're both things with lots of stuff." -- Sara