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KEEPING UP OUR STANDARDS June 13 Once upon a time, throughout the length and breadth of the fair city of Westmount, one found graceful cast-iron streetlamps - lamps with ornate bases, fluted shafts, and decorative globes. Since the identical model graced the city of Washington, they were known as Washingtonian lamp standards. In scale and style they matched our traditional architecture.
You may have noticed over the last few years replicas of these old lights showing up on our streets. This is the story of how they got reincarnated.
In the middle of the 1950s, it was judged that the original Washingtonian light standards with their incandescent light source did not give off a sufficient standard of light. Not really for the pedestrian, mind you, but for the car. The enlightened burghers of the day called for the gradual extirpation of these relics, starting with the main arteries. Forests of the old-style lights were felled, getting replaced by cobra-head highway-type lights that were twice as high. They were trademarked "Styletone". Ah, the triumph of the engineer over the architect - although I suspect the architects of the day found the Washingtonian too historical, too full of furbelows, too (horrors!) decorative. To add to this aesthetic cleansing, the new light source was mercury vapour, which made nighttime citizens look purple - thanks to this one-eyed purple-people creator. So by 1976, two-thirds of our streets had been "modernized" by highway lights. Then, when their turn came, the doughty residents of Parkman Place refused to accept the tall intruders. The programme was suspended.
In March 1981, the relighting programme, converting the "poorly-lit" remaining one-third of the city, was to be restarted. This is where I came in, dear reader. My street, Rosemount Avenue, was the first on the hit list - our original Washingtonian lights were to go. I got wind of it and got all my neighbours to write to city hall. We got a reprieve. I wrote a report.
In reading my files to do my column last week on the W.M.A. In 1986, Westmount again restarted the relighting programme, but this time with replica Washingtonian lampposts. In fact, 100-watt high-pressure sodium lamps are to be installed every 75 feet. I was vindicated! Today, our policy is to replace the 30-foot highway-lights put in in the 50s and 60s with "my" lights, whenever a street is being reconstructed. The costs are similar, and, I think you'll agree, they look great.
And I never sent the city a bill for my report.
THE WILD ONES If you went by the articles in THE EXAMINER, or the questions of City Council attendees, or my mail, you'd think the only animal species found in Westmount was the dog. It's not true. Aside from cats and such domestic animals, we have a huge resident population of raccoons, skunks, squirrels, pigeons, crows, and seagulls - and other animals who are here because we're here. They've become a real problem.
Not that I suffer from anthropocentrism - the view that we humans are the only important species on Earth. On the contrary. Our species is so successful we have contemptuously regarded all other fellow travellers on this planet as being put there for our personal utility (the Bible tells us so!). I sympathize with Pierre Foglia, who, writing in La Presse, says that for his wife, cats come first, then dogs, horses, and birds. Far behind, after spiders, scorpions, and black flies, come human beings.
So it is out of respect for animals that I tell you we have to do something about the unnatural overpopulation of raccoons and pigeons in Westmount. While the pathological worldwide overpopulation of our own species - homo fecundus - had led to the eradication of some animal species, it's had the opposite effect in urban environments. Most feral, yet urban animals owe their very existence to our cast-off foodstuffs - not to mention those misguided humans who actually feed them. Only one-third of these animals would have any chance of surviving in the wild. So trapping that raccoon under your porch and letting it out in the country is not a long-term nor humane solution. First off, if it's a lactating female, her brood will die. Secondly, and most importantly, it will simply be replaced by another raccoon eager to take over its territory.
The only - repeat - only way to get rid of unwanted urban wildlife is to cut off their source of food. Put your garbage in an hermetically-sealed solid box, for example. Don't feed squirrels or pigeons.
Nick Auf Der Maur recently made fun of Westmount's by-law that says "every person who feeds any pigeon, seagull, squirrel, other wild animal or vermin shall incur a penalty". He just doesn't get it. Pigeon droppings eat away at our architecture, attracting fleas, ticks, and mites, and may even harbour fungi and bacteria. It's also disgusting.
Now, I was guilty of feeding pigeons in the Piazza di San Marco in Venice, and in Trafalgar Square. I'm told that in Trafalgar Square, you now have to buy pigeon food, food that's laced with birth-control pills. I guess they have not thought about simply moving Nelson's Column!
Closer to home, one of our neighbours has single-handedly caused a pigeon infestation on our street. She ignored our plea to stop feeding them. In Montreal, it's even worse. Homeless people feed pigeons, who are their only friends. They've given each pigeon a name.
But you can have too much of a good thing. Even wild things
MY VACATION, VOCATION, AND VEXATION Jun 27 Since the age of 25, I've always been my own boss. Still am, I suppose, since as mayor I don't have a boss. In the singular, that is. I have singularly 20,500 bosses - enough, you will agree, to water down bossdom to a pretty diffuse role. So I get to write my own job description, set my working hours (sort of), and take my vacation when I want - more on that later. Then there's the little matter of salary - and I mean "little matter".
I made an election promise that remains unfulfilled: to raise my salary. At the time, both the editor of this paper and city officials gasped at my bravado: imagine, warning citizens of a pay raise at election time!
But how to calculate an appropriate salary for the mayor: that is the question. By population? Then Laval's mayor should get ten times the salary of his counterpart in Lachine, when in fact it's twice. Montreal would pay 100 times the mayor's salary in Hampstead, instead of four times. How about, then, by the size of a city's budget? That simply rewards mayors for spending. By the citizens' capacity to pay? I'd make out like a bandit with that - Westmount has one of the highest average incomes of any place in Canada. Generally, the poorer the city, the more they tend to pay the mayor - that's because richer cities produce mayors able to work for a less-than-average salary. In Westmount, no mayor could afford to own a house here on $32,000 a year, plus $5-10,000 from the MUC. Only people of independent means or apartment dwellers need apply. (The British consul-general once asked me whether the city provided a house for the mayor. I could not immediately respond, as I was doubled-up with laughter.)
But, you know, if a few local politicians are underpaid, it's fat city out there for people in the private sector. The average NBA basketball player (whose only attribute seems to be a severe pituitary problem) pulls down $1.4 million - up from $232,000 in 1982. The president of Bear Stearns earned $16 million in 1992. Closer to home, the president of Maple Leaf Foods raked in $3.6 million in 1995 - a lot of which was in the form of a golden parachute. Their profits also plummeted to earth, down 158%.
These obscene salaries are unbalancing society's sense of fairness. Even dyed-in-the-wool capitalists are starting to ask themselves whether we'll see a modern Peasants' Revolt, now that 10% of U.S. households own 67% of the wealth. Hell, 1% own over 40%! And the typical CEO of the largest U.S. corporation makes 200 times that of the least-paid employee.
In Westmount, I make less than most city employees, unless you count my MUC pay. And I don't have job security. Or a pension. And no 35-hour week. But, since we're negotiating with the unions, I'll deep-six my own salary demands. For now. Besides, I feel less guilty about taking a month's vacation this July, especially since the MUC, Conference of Suburban Mayors, and Quebec Municipalities Union close down too. Cheerio! © 1997 by David T. Nicholson
June 13, 1997
u
, I came across this report that I researched and wrote as a W.M.A. director. The report said that the city should stop any further installation of the tall pole, and listed sources of replicas of Washingtonian lampposts. I recommended these replicas be placed every 60 feet, and have a 70-watt high-pressure sodium light source casting the light downwards. I calculated this would give excellent illumination, and the lower height would eliminate obscuring by mature trees. The relighting programme was stopped dead in its tracks.
June 20, 1997
June 27, 1997
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