Buddhism: If shit happens, it isn`t really shit.
Hinduism: This shit has happened before.
Protestantism: If shit happens, it happens to someone else.
Catholicism: If shit happens, you deserved it.
Judaism: Why does shit always happen to us?
Taoism: Shit happens, so flow with it.
Hinduism: This shit happening is you.
Islamism: Shit happening is Allah`s Will.
Existentialism: Shit happening is absurd!
Zionism: What is the sound of shit happening?
New Ageism: A firm shit does not happen to me.
Atheistism: I don`t believe this shit.
Voodooism: Shit doesn`t just happen, somebody dumped it on you.
Televangelismism: Your tax-deductible donation could make this shit stop happening.
Jehovah`s Witness: Knock, knock! Shit is knocking.
Mormonism: Hey, there`s more shit over here!
Baptistism: You are shitting all wrong, and you`ll be punished for it.
Iraqi Baathistism: Oh, shit! What I'm looking for.
Unitarianism: Go ahead, shit anywhere you want.
Communism: It`s everybody`s shit.
Capitalism: Shit happens, and it`ll cost you!
Socialism: Shit happens, and it's all our's.
Tai Chi: Shit happens. Now think about it.
Narcissism: Shit, I`m so handsome!