• Ballad of Stainless Steel
• .
• In the night, a gleam of light comes streaming off the stage
• .As if florescent melodies were tearing off with rage,
• ..Then, through the vast cathedral came a rumbling from the floor
• ...As Stainless Steel waited for the start of rocking war.
• .
• His body stood eight feet or so, a towering work of art.
• .His gleaming armor reflected all the courage in his heart
• ..And on his mount, moved silently and swiftly through the night
• ...To the place, that all had chosen, waiting for the fight.
• .
• The crowd was mostly warriors, but peasants soon abounded.
• .By morn, the forests filled with life they never once surrounded
• ..And in the air, a trumpet sound stilled all existing noise
• ...As Stainless Steel prepared to battle all the Oak Ridge Boys(R).
• .
• In jousting, he maimed one of them, in hammers, he killed three
• .With only one slight wound to Steel, a slice above the knee.
• ..Then Steel screamed, with all his might, to all there in the crowd,
• ..."Don't ever try to tell me when I can't play music loud!"
• 
  
• .......You can't feel Stainless Steel
• ........As he cuts right through your soul
• .........For his wounds refuse to heal
• ..........Leaving scars of Rock and Roll
• .
• (c) 1984
• David Brager
• 
  

• ..............................The Ballad of Joe Momma
• .................(Sung to the tune of "Ghost Rider's in the Sky")
• .
• The street was fairly empty when the bus stopped for the train,
• The driver, to fulfill the law, opened the door again.
• And as the crossroad signals blared, the barricades came down.
• And that was when a man got off, and staggered into town.
• .
• His stature was five feet or so, his fingernails clean.
• The shirt was rather dirty; He was much more stout than lean.
• And as he looked into the sky, he saw a raindrop fall.
• He said, "I think its raining." From then he knew his call.
• .
• CHORUS:
• Doin' his job,
• .best as he can
• ..Joe Momma, The Weatherman
• .
• Twenty thousand weathermen had left the job before
• But the boss has patience for another thousand more
• 'Tis then that Joe walked in the station from the parking lot.
• He said, "I think its raining." He was hired on the spot.
• .
• They sat him in an office with a microphone and chair.
• They told him in one minute they would put him on the air.
• The light began to flash, and as the microphone came down.
• He said, "I think its raining." It was broadcast to the town.
• .
• CHORUS:
• .
• The boss walked to the window to behold the wondrous day.
• A flash flood hit the city; washed the station site away.
• And as Joe Momma drifted down and floated out of sight,
• The city sank in awe, the weatherman was right.
• .
• CHORUS:
• .
• LAST CHORUS: (Joe Momma, ACE Weatherman.)
• .
• Words (c) 1990 David Brager
• Ace Development and Integration
• Character "Joe Momma" was created and is
• used with permission of Greg Allen Kronlund
• Blue Ribbon Winner at Benton-Franklin Country Fair 1990

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