GAYGLFGIRL GETS
?$PON$ORED!?
N O T I C E this!
Bi-Polarized Golf Gear is a new sponsor. They use the complex technology of magnetism, along with some rogue chemicals, to produce equipment that can keep golfers from losing their composure on the fairway. (They drug you and make you cheat is all...) They say there's perscription strength Lithium in every club, ball and visor they sell, but we're a little skeptical. Dr. Jeanne has picked up a few hitchhikers to help her test that out. We should be getting an update on just exactly what B.P.G.G. puts in their products and how deadly it is soon. Our rating: 3 Bad Bogeys*
*Scale from Best to Worst: 3 Eagles; 2 Bagels; 1 Beagle; 1 Bad Dog; 2 Bird Dogs; 3 Bad Bogeys

Cool Clear Fruit of Queer is thinking about sponsoring us. While this may LOOK like a refreshing beverage, preliminary lab tests have revealed frightening shit! Not only does this stuff Peel Paint off the wall, but I spilled one drop on the floor last week and it hasn't stopped smoldering yet! Of course, this could have just been a bad batch, so we are not going to pass judgement yet. Why not enjoy a nice glass of your favorite flavor today? (Let us know what you think!)

I Still Don't Play Golf, But I Need The Money & The Attention. Any Questions?

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