Since I wrote this Bio in 1997, I have discovered that I am a transsexual. My friends told me this already but since I had been so late coming out of denial, it took me a while to figure out how I truly felt inside. In 1999, I had gotten married to the "girlfriend" mentioned below and was so for four years. When I finally decided that I wanted to transition, we both came to the conclusion that it would be best for both of us to divorce. I now live alone. So without further ado, here is the original unedited story...

Why am I a transvestite? I've asked myself this question several times. I don't know. But then I've often wondered why we have five fingers on each hand... That's just the way it is! I don't know if my circumstances are common but I do not feel like a woman trapped in a man's body. I enjoy being a man. I also enjoy wearing sexy feminine things. Sometimes I just want to look pretty! If it were an option, I would choose to be able to go back and forth between male and female at will. Since that is not possible, I choose to be a man... A man who is truly in touch with his feminine side and not suppressing it. I wish transgenderism wasn't treated by society like an infectious disease that needs to be cured instead of just dealt with. A hundred years ago, a woman wearing pants would have been a crossdresser. Today, that same woman is just a woman in pants. So why is a man in a dress someone who has a problem?

Okay, before I get too much into that, let me get to the point. Why am I a transvestite? When did it begin? I'd like to start at the beginning but it's hard to say exactly when my story begins, so I'll do my best. From the very start I liked both boy and girl things, cars and dolls. At the age of 12 I started becoming attracted to girls. At 14, I began to get curious as to what being a woman was like. I've always liked being who I am, but the girls always seemed to have fun too. Why? What did they feel that I didn't? I've always had as many female friends (just friends) as male, probably because I enjoy doing the things that girls like as much as I enjoy doing "guy things".

As you may have guessed, the first picture on my home page is not my body, it's my creative handiwork. In fact, that's pretty much how I got started.

I started out drawing sexy portraits of myself with a female body until I had a rather large collection. I also wrote several paragraphs featuring me transforming into a woman, which I rarely kept. These stories were usually very descriptive, telling in detail how each part of my body changed. The drawings too were very detailed.

For years, the drawings were only viewed by me... until the beginning of 1997 when my girlfriend happened across them. At first, she didn't know how to feel. Eventually she decided that it made her happy but she didn't know how to tell me. When she finally told me that she had found my artwork, I got angry. I wasn't sure if it was because she had snooped through my things or because she found my secret drawings. In any case, I was upset and not exactly sure why. Days later I calmed down a bit, thought about our situation, and tried to explain to her the reason why I was so upset about her discovery. I believe my exact words were, "Now we'll never have a normal relationship". Since then, we've had a great abnormal relationship. In fact, we're married now!

Eventually, the subject became a little easier to talk about and she asked me if she had a name. Her name popped into my head like it had always been there. Somewhere inside me I knew her name was Rachael!

My girlfriend picked out some of her clothes that she thought would look cute on me and I put them on. For the first time, Rachael was no longer just in my mind or on paper, she was here!

Together, we grew. We shopped for Rachael, we talked about Rachael, we even bought her gifts. When my girlfriend wanted to spend time with Rachael, I would transform and we would have dinner, watch movies, or sometimes just talk. We did everything behind closed curtains.

One night, my girlfriend said, let's go out dancing. I told her maybe on Halloween.

When Halloween finally arrived, I wore a sexy silk dress and we went to dinner and then went dancing. For the first time, Rachael was out. And what a reaction she got! I got flirted with, whistled at, I loved the attention. But most of all, my girlfriend and I had a great time!

So, why am I a transvestite? I don't think I will ever know why. I just know that I am, and I have accepted it. Once I did that, it became a whole lot easier to understand and deal with. It has even been quite fun! Nothing in this world is black and white, there are many different colors in-between. From the full-time transsexual to the guy who enjoys the occasional feel of panties, we're all simply people trying to be happy.

If you can relate to my story and you need someone to talk to, E-mail me at:

Best Wishes,