1.Make race car noises when anyone gets on or off.

2.Blow your nose and offer to show the contents of your kleenex to

other

passengers.

3.Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut

up, dammit, all of you just shut UP!"

4.Whistle the first seven notes of "It's a Small World" incessantly.

5.Sell Girl Scout cookies.

6.On a long ride, sway side to side at the natural frequency of the

elevator.

7.Shave.

8.Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside

ask: "Got

enough air in there?"

9.Offer name tags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear yours

upside-down.

10.Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without

getting off.

11.When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors

open,

then act embarrassed when they

open by themselves.

12.Lean over to another passenger and whisper: "Noogie patrol coming!"

13.Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake and ask

them to call you Admiral.

14.One word: Flatulence!

15.On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it stay

open

until you hear the penny you

dropped down the shaft go "plink" at the bottom.

16.Do Tai Chi exercises.

17.Stare, grinning, at another passenger for a while, and then

announce:

"I've got new socks on!"

18.When at least 8 people have boarded, moan from the back: "Oh, not

now,

damn motion sickness!"

19.Give religious tracts to each passenger.

20.Meow occassionally.

21.Bet the other passengers you can fit a quarter in your nose.

22.Frown and mutter "gotta go, gotta go" then sigh and say "oops!"

23.Show other passengers a wound and ask if it looks infected.

24.Sing "Mary had a little lamb" while continually pushing buttons.

25.Holler "Chutes away!" whenever the elevator descends.

26.Walk on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.

27.Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce "You're one of

THEM!" and move to the far corner of the elevator.

28.Burp, and then say "mmmm...tasty!"

29.Leave a box between the doors.

30.Ask each passenger getting on if you can push the button for them.

31.Wear a puppet on your hand and talk to other passengers "through"

it.

32.Start a sing-along.

33.When the elevator is silent, look around and ask "is that your

beeper?"

34.Play the harmonica.

35.Shadow box.

36.Say "Ding!" at each floor.

37.Lean against the button panel.

38.Say "I wonder what all these do" and push the red buttons.

39.Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope.

40.Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the

other

passengers that this is your "personal space."

41.Bring a chair along.

42.Take a bite of a sandwich and ask another passenger: "Wanna see

wha in

muh mouf?"

43.Blow spit bubbles.

44.Pull your gum out of your mouth in long strings.

45.Announce in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host

body."

46.Carry a blanket and clutch it protectively.

47.Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.

48.Wear "X-Ray Specs" and leer suggestively at other passengers.

49.Stare at your thumb and say "I think it's getting larger."

50.If anyone brushes against you, recoil and holler "Bad touch!"