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Alabama . . . At Least We’re Not Mississippi

Alaska . . . 11,623 Eskimos Can’t Be Wrong!

Arizona . . . Dehyd-rific!

Arkansas . . . Litterasy Ain’t Everthang

California . . . As Seen on TV

Colorado . . . If You Don’t Ski, Don’t Bother

Connecticut . . . Like Massachusetts, Only Dirtier and With Less Character

Delaware . . . We were the First! Damit! and don’t you forget it!

Florida . . . Ask Us About Our Grandkids

Georgia . . . We Put the "Fun" in Fundamentalist Extremism

Hawaii . . . Haka Tiki Mou Sha’ami Leeki Toru (Death to Mainland Scum, But Leave Your Money)

Idaho . . . More Than Just Potatoes... Well Okay, We’re Not, But The Potatoes Sure Are Real Good

Illinois . . . Gateway to Iowa

Indiana . . . 2 Billion Years Tidal Wave Free!

Iowa . . . Land of James T. Kirk

Kansas . . . First Of The Rectangle States

Kentucky . . . Five Million People; Fifteen Last Names

Louisiana . . . We’re Not All Drunk Cajun Wackos, But That’s Our Tourism Campaign

Maine . . . Cheap Lobster, but don’t stick around

Maryland . . . A Thinking Man’s Delaware

Massachusetts . . . Our Taxes Are Lower Than Sweden’s (For Most Tax Brackets)

Michigan . . . First Line of Defense From the Canadians

Minnesota . . . For Sale... Ahsuppose

Mississippi . . . Come Feel Better About Your Own State

Missouri . . . Your Federal Flood Relief Tax Dollars at Work

Montana . . . Land of the Big Sky, the Unabomber, and The Best Darn Militia

Nebraska . . . Ask About Our State Motto Contest

Nevada . . . Whores and Poker!

New Hampshire . . . Go Away and Leave Us Alone

New Jersey . . . You Want a ##$%##! Motto? I Got Yer ##$%##! Motto Right Here!

New Mexico . . . Lizards Make Excellent Pets

New York . . . You Have the Right to Remain Silent, You Have the Right to

an Attorney

North Carolina . . . Tobacco Is a Vegetable

North Dakota . . . Um... We’ve got... Um... Dinosaur Bones? Yeah, Dinosaur Bones!

Ohio . . . Don’t Judge Us by Cleveland

Oklahoma . . . Like the Play, Only No Singing

Oregon . . . Spotted Owl, It’s What’s For Dinner

Pennsylvania . . . Cook With Coal

Rhode Island . . . We’re Not REALLY an Island

South Carolina . . . Remember the Civil War? We Didn’t Actually Surrender

South Dakota . . . Closer Than North Dakota

Tennessee . . . The Educashun State

Texas . . . Se Hablo Ingles

Utah . . . Our Jesus Is Better Than Your Jesus

Vermont . . . Yep

Virginia . . . Who Says Government Stiffs and Slackjaw Yokels Don’t Mix?

Washington . . . Help! We’re Overrun By Nerds and Slackers!

Washington, D.C. . . . Wanna Be Mayor?

West Virginia . . . One Big Happy Family-Really!

Wisconsin . . . Come Cut Our Cheese

Wyoming . . . Wynot? >>