MeddaLosesMind

     “Hellloooooooooooooo. My name is Medda Larkson, or the Swedish Meadowlark, and I have a really corny name. Aren’t you the cutest little thing that ever was?” Medda asked playing with her feather. She sat down on a pink sofa, and begins her life story. “Once upon a time, there was a little girl, who was me, and she grew up to be me. Isn’t it surprising dears?” Medda laughed.

   “Have you ever met Jack Kelly?” she continued. “I had never seen him before in my life, until he came backstage. He is actually older than I am, and I am 42. As for little Les, he is actually my sister! And Racetrack was my husband in my last life, when I was a ground hog.” She got down on all fours and begins to snort. “It was fun being a ground hog, but not as fun as when I was snail.”

   "You know Kid Blink’s eye patch? It is actually edible.” Then she got up and began to do tai chi. “The dying swan,” she explained, and collapsed on the floor in a heap. “I had marmalade for breakfast this morning,” she said and stuck out her tongue. “Do you know who I’ve had a crush on ever since the rally? Warden Snyder,” she said in a whisper. “He looks so good in his uniform,” she said swooning.

    “Do you remember Spot Conlon? I taught that boy how to fight! He was in one of my shows once, he was a tap dancer. Remember his key? It actually opens a closet in the back of the stage which is full of clown costumes he used to wear, back in the day, when he was called Toby.”
Medda stands up, gets a cup of coffee, and pours it down her shirt. Then she gets a doughnut and places it on her nose. “Sarah is my mother, and she the strongest person in the world, she was very strict with me and 17 brothers and sisters back when we lived on the moon.” She got up and began howling at the moon.

   “When I was a ground hog, Mush was my son,” she wipes away a tear. “He’s all grown up now. Kloppman is my daddy, he used to be married to Sarah.”

   “Boots was the principal of my school when I was younger, and he appeared in the movie Bye, Bye Birdie with me. Crutchy is my grandfather, he spoils me rotten, and he’s very rich, much richer than Pulitzer. He hurt his leg in the revolutionary war, the poor thing.”

   “As for Bryan Denton, he is actually only two years old. I gave him his first pencil, and I taught him everything he knows,” she looks very proud as she displays the last place award out of his whole class. “Isn’t it wonderful? He’s really making something of himself.”

   “Snipeshooter was sent down from heaven to be my guardian angel, bless his soul, he died back in the 17 hundreds. As for David, well he’s a pain, so I won’t even mention him,” she said frowning momentarily, before getting up and skipping around the room, going, “Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

    “Bumlets, Itey, and Skittery, are my Icelandic parrots. I am their flock, and be careful of cats, and Jack Russell terriers, one scratch from them can be deadly. Give them these next time you see them,” she hands you a bag of fruits and vegetables cut so that they are exactly one centimeter. “It took me 10 days to chop these.”

   “The other newsies are just me in disguise, so don’t believe a word they say,” Medda said firmly. “I have a show to rehearse for, you may watch, consider it an honor.” She goes up to the front of the stage, and begins to sing, ‘I’m A Little Tea Pot,’ while do-si-doing and banging into everything.
Then she fell under the stage, and nobody ever saw her again. It is said that she still haunts Irving Hall, and sometimes if you listen hard enough you can hear ‘I’m a little tea pot short and stout…’