This will be my fourth holiday season behind bars. I thought that as time passed being separated from my family on special occasions would become easier to deal with, but this is not the case. Each Christmas it is getting harder and harder to be separated from my loved ones. Every New Year it becomes more and more difficult to show the people I care about how much they mean to me.

Death row lost its hobby craft privilege before I ever arrived here so now all I can really send any one is a Christmas card the Chaplain passes out or a card I paid someone to draw for me. To me just sending a card does not feel like it relays fully how much someone being in my life for another year means to me I guess I could send a person more than one care but that seems more stupid than special.

Only being able to send cards at Christmas really hurts my heart. If I was free I would not even be worried about this. I would have every day to show the people I care about how important they are to me. But I can only blame myself for my incarceration. Instead of being able to spend each Christmas with my family , watching as their faces light up at the presents they received, I am forced to use my imagination to guess the words they spoke through picture I received.

Instead of watching each day as my sisters, nephews and nieces grow older I can only be amazed at the changes in them when I am lucky enough to get a visit. Loving through prison walls is a very difficult task. I would not wish it upon my worst enemy. But I will continue to give it my best efforts as long as prisons walls separate me from those who are dear to my heart.

Mark Duke Z-655
Holman 3700, 3-D-ll
Atmore, AL 36503
USA

Written Christmas 2001

Something to think about

Words from death row......

For a full list of articles written by Juveniles on Alabama's Death Row, go to the complete list of titles at Stories.