May The Force Be With You, Jareth

Dramatis Personae/Chapter 1

(A/N)My first crossover. Also, very self-insertion. Be kind.*G* By the way, ~something~=Force talking, *something*=thoughts. Also, standard disclaimer applies. I don't own anyone or anything but myself.*G*

Dramatis Personae

Jareth:King of the Goblins, hottie in tights. Need any more be said?

Luke Skywalker:Jedi Master.

Mara Jade Skywalker: Luke's wife, Jedi, ex-smuggler, ex-emperor's hand. Expert at killing.

LeAnn:Daughter of Melody, who is the third Skywalker triplet, making LeAnn Luke and Leia's neice and Jaina, Jacen, and Anakin's cousin. Same age as Jaina and Jacen. Labyrinth obsessed listian who enjoys torturing Jareth.

Chapter 1

LeAnn ran down the corridors of her school as the goblin King appeared in front of her. *Oh, no,* she thought, coming to a halt in a place where several other students, some of them ITS pledges, filled the hall. *Traffic jam!* Not caring that most of the other students didn't know her secret identity, LeAnn let go of her holo disguise and quickly pressed a button on her belt, disappearing just before Jareth reached her.

Landing at the Jedi Academy on Yavin IV, the young listian dashed into the office of her uncle, the Jedi Master Luke Skywalker. She then hid behind his desk, trembling. "He's after me!" she screamed. Luke only chuckled slightly. He was quite used to his neice going on about some King named Jareth wanting to kill her. "What did you do to him that he wants to kill you this time?" he asked. LeAnn looked up at him. "Just a song. Really! I didn't think he'd hate it that much!" Luke raised an eyebrow at her.

"Alright!" she screamed. "First I stalled long enough for Mel to sing Who Let The Bog Out, then goblins jumped him, then I sang my Laby version of The Bum Bum Song. Then me, Unicorn Lady, Mel, and Northstar and our dates to the ball turned on the sprinkler system in the ballroom and his bedroom and THEN I sang She Ate The Peach. Luke chuckled. "Is that all?" he asked, an amused look on his face. "No..." LeAnn whimpered. "I also put a pink harem costume on him and made his castle into a replica of Cinderella's castle, decorating it in pastells and filling his closet with harem costumes!"

This only made Luke laugh harder. That was when his wife, Mara, walked in. She took one look at the scene and started laughing. "Let me guess," she said. "You messed with Jerry-" "Jareth!" "-Jareth, again, and now he's mad and you're running from him?" LeAnn nodded, then her eyes grew wide. So did Luke's. They were both staring at Mara. No, they were staring behind her. The ex-Emperor's Hand spun around, not knowing what to expect. Whatever she expected, it wasn't what she saw.

Jareth, King of the goblins, was tall, blond, handsome, and, apparently, well endowed. LeAnn glanced up, nervously. "Hiya, Tights. How's it goin'?" she asked, her voice trembling. Jareth just gave her a stony glare. "That was some ball wasn't it?" she continued, rambling on, trying to stall. "Although, next year, maybe you should ban the vamps? After all, you, Hoggle, I, and several other listians almost got turned into Happy Meals." Jareth yawned before finally speaking. "If you're quite finished rambling on like a bumbling idiot," he said, "would you mind turning my castle and wardrobe back?"

LeAnn nodded meekly and, with a wave of her hand, turned the castle and J's wardrobe into its origional form. Unfortunatly, for J's wardrobe that meant bell bottoms, hippy stuff, and polyester jumpsuits. It also turned Jareth's hair into a huge blond afro. LeAnn raised an eyebrow. "So YOU'RE the genius behind disco!" she cried. Jareth nodded slightly. "Just don't tell anyone" he told her. "Now, however, about the rest of your punishment..." This last was said while producing a rather murkey looking crystal. *Oh no! A bog bomb!* LeAnn thought. She recognized them all too well.

This was not the first time LeAnn had been hung head first over the Bog of Eternal Stench. This would be the third, and by now the routine was getting old. LeAnn told Jareth as much. Jareth smirked. "Well, there is an old saying that says "Let the punishment fit the crime," he said. LeAnn cringed as he grabbed her. Luke finally spoke up. "Now wait just a minute," he said. "What gives you any right to punish my neice?" he asked as LeAnn faded from sight. Jareth smirked. "I'm her King. As a listian, she's under my command." "And what if Luke and I wish to challenge that command?" Mara asked.

Chapter 2

Luke and Mara both looked past Jareth, who was pointing out over a vast stretch of land. "She's there, in my castle." he said. "Is that the castle beyond the Goblin City?" Luke asked. "Do you still want to look for her?" Jareth asked in return. "It doesn't look that far," Mara stated. "It's further than you think," Jareth replied. "Time is short. You have thirteen hours in which to solve the labyrinth before your neice becomes one of us forever. Such a pity."

With that, Jareth disappeared, and Luke and Mara started down the path towards the labyrinth. "Ok," Luke said. "According to LeAnn, there should be a dwarf around here to tell us how to get inside the maze..." "Could that be him?" Mara asked. They walked towards the dwarf they saw. "Excuse us," she said. The dwarf jumped slightly and spun around. "Oh, excuse me," he said. "I'm Hoggle. And who might you be?" "I'm Luke, and this is my wife, Mara. We're searching for the entrance so we can rescue our neice..."

"Cor, I think this is the first time Jareth has ever had someone wished away by two people at the same time," Hoggle said. "We didn't exactly wish LeAnn away..." Mara started. Hoggle's eyes lit up. "LeAnn? You're her aunt and uncle? Well why didn't you say so? C'mon. Ya gets in there." he said, opening the doors for the two Jedi. "Oh, and here's a hint. Go right and just keep goin'. There's all sorts of doors hidden in the walls of the outer coridor, but if you just keep goin' down to the right, you'll get straight to the castle, even if ya do gots ta go through the Bog of Eternal Stench. Just don't step in the water, there, and you'll be fine." Luke and Mara thanked him, and headed on their way.

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Meanwhile, in the castle, LeAnn had managed to get out of Jareth's sight and start running amock. She was currently in the library, an area she hadn't gotten a chance to explore during the Villian's Ball. She quickly used the Force to scan over all the book titles until she came to the one she was looking for. She carefully took it off the shelf, and used her thespian magic to cast the spell that would give her Fae magic. She then replaced the book and dashed out of the library.

Jareth, on the other hand, had grown tired of looking for her. Why did she have to be so much trouble? Just thinking about her was giving him a headache. He looked at the clock. 12 hours left. It was plenty of time in which to make a short visit to an old friend. The goblin King pulled out a crystal, threw it up, changed into an owl, and flew Aboveground. He then went to see Sarah, smiling to himself, knowing Sarah wasn't expecting a visit from him, friendly or no.

Chapter 3

Sarah jumped, startled, as Jareth appeared in her living room. She had been enjoying her day alone until now. "What do you want, Jareth?" she growled. She did not like uninvited guests in her house, and Jareth was definately uninvited. The Goblin King actually looked hurt at her greeting. "Why Sarah, I just came for a short visit. Is it so wrong of me to want to see you?" he asked. Sarah gave him her best "Don't-give-me-that-bs-I-can-see-right-through-you" look. Jareth sighed.

"Alright. I admit it. I needed a bit of a distraction from the game currently being played out in my labyrinth. That and the listian running amock in my castle is giving me a headache," he said, showing Sarah a crystal which held LeAnn's image in it. Sarah raised an eyebrow, saw what was going on, and had to laugh. "Looks like she's been into your books. You might want to find her and check up on her. She may have put some spell on herself that you'll have to reverse..."

Jareth looked well defeated. "Which will be impossible if she used the thespian magic she's already got to put it on herself..." He sighed. He was really starting to regret ever taking LeAnn. Now she was running amock in his castle doing God knows what. He just hoped he got rid of her before the goblins started to act like her. "I'd better get back before she tears my beautiful labyrinth apart," he said, standing again. He then kissed Sarah's hand lightly. "However, if ever you wish to visit, Sarah, you're more than welcome." With that, he disappeared.

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Luke and Mara had just entered the Bog. The smell assaulted their senses quickly, and both looked as if they were about to gag to death from the stench. "Yuch..." Luke said. "I didn't think it was possible for there to be a worse smell than the inside of a tauntaun..." Mara was about to make a snappy comeback, but decided the effort was better being put forth to breathing. "Look," she said. "There's a bridge. Maybe it'll lead us out of here." They headed over, and were about to step onto the bridge when a small orange fox jumped in front of them.

"Halt!" the fox cried. "No one may cross this bridge without MY permission!" Luke frowned, then decided to use the trick he had seen Obi-Wan use on the stormtroopers. He passed his hand infront of the fox's face. "We have your permission, and may go across the bridge." The fox only blinked. "You're related to LeAnn, aren't you?" he asked. Luke nodded as Mara chuckled. It seemed their neice had several friends here. "Jareth decided to finally get back at her for all the trouble she and some of her fellow listians have caused. We're here to rescue her." Mara informed the little fox.

Mara and Luke told the fox the entire story. The fox told them, in turn, of all LeAnn, Norma, Kim, and Melissa had done at the Villian's balls and through their stories. Even though LeAnn had already told them about it, Mara and Luke were doubled over, laughing. This fox had a certain dramatic flare. "In the quest to rescue your neice, I, Sir Didymus, and my loyal steed, Ambrosius, are at your service." the fox said, bowing. He then whistled for Ambrosius, and the four of them set off for the castle.

Chapter 4

LeAnn, in her wanderings around the castle, had somehow managed to make it into Jareth's bedroom. She smirked. She wouldn't do anything major. She wouldn't do anything J would notice immediatly. But it would still be devious. Not to mention it would probably get her in major trouble with Tights and gain brownie points for bravery from her friends. She snatche all of J's best pouches, conjured up a crystal, put the pouches in the crystal, then put the crystal away in her bra for safe keeping.

She then dashed out before Jareth to catch her. Seeing him, she dashed into the next door she saw. *Damn. Ballroom. I gotta get outta here before J turns the sprinklers on me...* She turned to leave, and bumped into a very familiar body. She glanced up to see Jareth, who had a very good grip on her arms. "Well well well," he said. "If it isn't you. And what, may I ask, are you doing?" LeAnn looked up at him innocently. "Nothing," she said. J smirked. "Nothing? Nothing? Nothing tralala?"

LeAnn frowned. She knew that tone. She'd seen the movie enough times to know she was in trouble. "Your aunt and uncle are going through the labyrinth this moment trying to rescue you," he said, pointing to a clock. It showed they had maybe 10 hours left. "If you don't behave," Jareth told her, "I'll move time. I'll move it so they'll never have a chance of getting to you on time. And to make sure you behave, I'm locking you up in one of the spare rooms. Not even this little toy," he told her, taking her lightsaber away.

"Oh no you don't. NOBODY takes my lightsaber away..."LeAnn growled, attempting to draw the weapon back to her own hands with the Force. She looked shocked that she couldn't do it. Jareth snickered. "I see you've finally found a new property of my realm. No Force ability. Magic only." LeAnn raised an eyebrow at him, then smirked. "Fine. If that's the game you want to play, then I'm willing to play it," she said, pulling the lightsaber to her hand with the Fae magic she'd stolen. She grinned as Jareth's eyes went wide in shock.

"Nice library you've got, Jareth. Very interesting books in there. Well, I'd love to stay and chat, but, I've gotta go find Uncle Luke and Aunt Mara," she said, grinning. Jareth only smiled. "Go ahead. I don't want you around anyway," he told her. LeAnn wasn't quite sure why he was smiling. She didn't trust him. Still, she made the effort to do the translocation.....

And failed. She glared at the goblin King, who was laughing. "Undo the anti-translocation spell," she told him. He didn't listen. He was too busy laughing. LeAnn was pissed. She used her thespian magic to put him back into the pink harem outfit. You realize, of course, Tights," she said, "this means war." Jareth raised an eyebrow at her, then saw what she had done. "You're right," he said. "This is very much war...." The battle between King and listian had begun.

Chapter 5

LeAnn wandered around the castle, trying to avoid Jareth and trouble at the same time. She didn't want to be the cause of loss of the game for her aunt and uncle. And, in truth, that was what it was to Jareth. A huge game. LeAnn turned a corner and stepped into Jareth's study. Big mistake. A bucket of peaches fell on top of her head, and Jareth was waiting there, laughing. "A bit lacking in imagination for you, isn't this, Tights?" she asked. She attempted to use the Fae magic to clean herself off, but found the peach mess in her hair and covering her clothes was enchanted.

"Please either take the enchantment off the peaches or show me to a shower, Jareth," she sighed. Jareth did better, using his own magic to remove the mess. LeAnn immediatly cast her own spell, turning his hair bright orange and making his skin blue. "Jareth, you make such a handsome smurf," she said, giggling. "But you're much better looking as one," he responded, as he turned LeAnn's skin blue as well. LeAnn tackled Jareth and, conjuring some theater dirt with her thespian magic, rubbed it deeply Jareth's face.

When she was done, she removed the smurf spell, looked at Jareth, and fell back laughing. "Forget Goblin King, J. You should try being the Oompa-Loompa King!" It was true. Jareth did look like an Oompa-Loompa, as LeAnn had known he would after having watched her friend Landon rub in the dirt too well for Fiddler on the Roof. This was getting too good. But the glare in Jareth's eyes was dangerous. LeAnn took off running, His Royal Tightness chasing her.

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The chase finally ended when King and listian realized how silly and childish they were acting. They both fell down laughing. "Truce?" LeAnn asked, holding her hand out to Jareth. "Truce," he agreed, taking it. "Well, cease fire until Uncle Luke and Aunt Mara get here to rescue me," LeAnn amended, a small smirk on her face. "Of course," Jareth replied. "Meanwhile, why don't you join me for dinner? Your aunt and uncle still have seven hours, and dinner is in one. We'll both have time to clean up." "Sounds good, J," LeAnn said, as they got up and Jareth showed her to a room she could clean and dress in.

After LeAnn finished her shower, she found her clothes were missing. They were a mess. Maybe they were being washed. She looked in the wardrobe, deciding to borrow one of the dresses in it. They were all tasteless. Low cut, sleeveless or strapless, and high slits. She used her thespian magic to turn the dark blue one into something with 3/4 sleeves, higher cut, and no slit. Atleast now she could face Jareth at dinner without blushing feriously.

Chapter 6
Just as LeAnn and Jareth sat down to dinner, Luke and Mara burst in, lightsabers humming. They looked at the scene in surprise, which caused both LeAnn and Jareth to chuckle. "What happened here?" Mara asked. "Your neice and I have a truce, at the moment," Jareth replied. "Just until we're outta here, though," LeAnn added. "Then I go right back to torturing him along with my fellow peach sisters." she said, grinning. "We were just about to eat dinner. Would you like to join us?" Jareth asked.

"No, thanks," Luke said. "We really should be getting back to the Academy before anyone misses us. And you, young lady, need to get home before your mother starts to worry." Mara said, giving a scolding look to her neice. LeAnn only looked innocent. "Alright. Bye, Jareth. See you in the next peach war," she said, an evil glint in her eyes as she, Luke, and Mara faded out.

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Late that night, in her room, LeAnn held up a crystal, looking into it. "Why didn't you tell her? I wished myself away, Jareth, just like you asked me to. And I ran, just like you asked me to, and ran to Uncle Luke and Aunt Mara, just like you asked me to. We had it all planned. Why didn't you tell her the truth, like we planned?" Jareth sighed as the young listian's barage of questions. "I could sense the time wasn't right," he replied. "Soon, though, it will be, and I shall tell her," he said, his voice much calmer than LeAnn's. He knew the girl had never been patient.

"When will the time be right, Tights? I need some signs so I'll know when to get you two together again so you can tell her, dammit!" "Look for physical changes, crystals, anything," the King replied. "But trust me, you'll know, because I'm going to keep an eye on her, now, and when the time is right, I'll send you a....pink crystal, that glows just like your lightsaber, yet is as cool to the touch as granite stone." LeAnn sighed. "Fine. I'm just tired of keeping this secret," she said, before throwing the crystal down in a shower of glitter.