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Wee Anders was born in Haugesund Norge to Tor and Elísabet, two proud parents who couldn't have known that this little pink being would turn into such a complete weirdo. Dad and mum were keeping each other warm on a cold December night when one of his wigglies wound up in that curious place where I began, and after nine months of planning an all-out assault on the sanities of those who would be my friends and family, I exploded into this world on the 5th of September, 1987. So far I've enjoyed being here. There are things I can't understand, such as people bombing on other people to 'create peace,' and there are things that amaze me, such as how we have developed the arts and sciences to the point where the common person can learn much and express much. I enjoy how someone invented the recipé for oat and raisin cookies, too. I've never tried another one, but I still think my family is the best one for me. Mum and dad are good people, and the more I think about it and the older I get, the more I realise how true that is. I'm not sure what I think about my brother and perhaps that's 'cos the heart I feel about him is so giant that there isn't room in me for the mind to think about him. I have always lived in Haugesund and that's fine with me. I like our town for most possible reasons. Our house is in the north part beside a lake. Jori lives here too. He's our hound who we sometimes call Edgar Allen Poe 'cos he dug up our dead cat twice and still digs all over to see if he can get the jackpot a third time. He's a morbid weirdo! We like to travel and our best times have been at St. Petersburg, Iceland, Scotland, Tromsø and the mountains in Telemark. I have good friends who are real individuals. In his mind, Jostein is Arnold Schwarzenegger, and if a Jostein fan club existed, he would be president. Terje is good with people and can talk you into believing anything if you're not careful. Magnus is great at sports and technical thinking, and if Terje ever persuades the nation into making him prime minister, I hope Magnus is his first adviser because he's most intelligent. He's also dead gorgeous. Sondre's one of few who can hug me. He earned the privilage from being a kind friend for so long that I even began to want to hug him, shock gasp! Bendu has the funniest, most clever ideas. He's notorious at school for his bad marks and his ability to improvise great raps on the spot. Morten is so quiet that people think he is depressed! He's a good person, and creative! I'm weird about music, I hate almost all that I hear. I like «Pride» and «Beautiful Day» from U2 and «Biko» from Peter Gabriel a lot, and I like the Velvet Underground records and David Bowie's Hunky Dory record. But the music I love is Dmitrij Sjostakovitsj's music. He's a Russian composer and something in his music makes me feel like I'm crashing into life itself! Books and films are much better for me than music, I think because books and films are more about characters than moods, and most music captures some mood and nothing more. Films I'm most fond of are «Wicker Man», «Roman Polanski's le Locataire», «Dr. Strangelove», «This Sporting Life», «Being There», and «F. est un salaud». The books I most love are «The Loneliness Of The Long Distance Runner» from Alan Sillitoe, «Lolita» from Vladimir Nabokov, «Lord Jim» from Joseph Conrad, «The Catcher In The Rye» from JD Salinger, «Grendel» from John Gardner. So far I've liked all the books I've read from Salman Rushdie, EM Forster, Neil Gaiman, and I can't forget the Calvin & Hobbes stories! Mum and dad are obsessed with being Christians and I think Jesus was one of the coolest men who ever lived, but I'm not a Christian and I'm atheist. Being ethical and kind no matter what is most important, and although the religions are meant to help people be ethical and kind, I think most people get caught up in their religions and stop seeing what is ethical and what is kind and start seeing only what is or isn't part of their religion. I'm still learning about politics, so I'm not sure all of what I believe, but I know that President Bush is not my friend, and as much as he claims to be a Christian, his actions are nothing close to Jesus Christ's actions. People like Mandela and Václav Havel remind me how great some leaders can be, and things would be so great in the world if all the nations followed the United Nations Universal Declaration of Human Rights. In some nations, telling someone you're homo seems to be equal to telling them you kill old women with rocks, but trust me, I'm thus far innocent of that crime! I like chaps, that's all. Lots of people online ask what made me homo. I have no idea. What made them straight, I have to wonder. I have had a boyfriend called Kristian since 11 December of last year. It's the first boyfriend for each of us. Interesting so far. The kisses are good! Here's a homo filmguide I made for Liam and whomever else is interested. Other interests include football with the mates, swimming, learning English, improving what miniscule talent I have with paints and pencils, being online to meet and learn from people of different ages and backgrounds, getting the most sun possible soaked into this white bum of mine, and writing the continuing sagas of Beega the self-loathing hermaphrodite slug. In autumn 2001 an uncle gave me a computer and that's when I started spending time online. First I hung out in Norwegian chats, then moved to English chats last summer. Now I have a good crew of mates I talk with in person-to-person chats and I seldom go to public chats anymore. The first online mates of mine were Petter and Kjersti from a nice regional chat, and Lars and Síg from a Norwegian homo chat. I still talk with Síg all the time and he's a genius. Måns is the best Swede that ever lived and an honourary Norwegian, a title he cuddles. Dieter is this sweet German bloke who can be a bit deranged, and Katarina and I will be married in my next lifetime, provided I'm not homo twice in a row. Rob's earned a P.H.D. in kindness from Universitetet i Lindstadland after overcoming his initial homophobia and becoming such a nice mate! One of the best ever if I'm down, takk. Then there's charming Ivar and that interesting Manhattaner who throws his voodoo nets into me and comes up with loads of personal thoughts and feelings that seldom surface. There are others such as Usman, Ponku, Fima, M. Peace, Kate, her turtle Sam, Kushel, Shea, and even some Mir character. Nice I'm knowing them. The future? Let's hope I'll have a great love, good health, the sense to appreciate the good that might come, and lots and lots of toffee, thanks!
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